If you're on social media for reasons other than comedy, your mental health will suffer. There is no social media that is safe to take seriously, ever, and too many people take their socials seriously. If we aren't silly, we'll have to feel the weight of it all~

Depuralize a movie: Untine . . . . . (Quarantine)

You ever wish some of the right wing B.S. was true? What if the Impossible Whopper did feminize you? Wouldn't it be great if transitioning cost 3 weekly trips to BK?! No doctors approving that you really for sure want this, just buy some soy from the grocery store and grow F-cups in a year? Baller.

Does everyone refer to the hellsite as TwiX or is that just me? You get banned for upsetting any Elon fan. They keep getting new lawsuits against them, because that's all that AI is good for. They're TwiX not sponsored by Twix, but I dislike that corporation for other reasons

Airplane Beetlejuice Cool Runnings Dawn of the Dead Ender's Game Frankenstein Gridiron Gang Happy Feet In Bruges Jumanji Killers Love My Fair Lady No Country for Old Men O Brother Where Art Thou Pinocchio Quality Street Radio Speed Racer Three Brothers Us V WWZ X Yes Man Zootopia Yay they all fit!

Bad Bunny won the Super Bowl!!!!! #BadBunnyBowl #SeagullsVsProudBoys

You: *angrily* "F#%k this weather!" The weather: *unzips* "Very well."

My cat friend Roxy passed away, so this poem came out of me. Remember that surviving is hard, and let yourself feel things! This has been one of the best cries I've had in a long time, and I'll be fine, even if I'm not right now.

The #MTG nerds got me to make the most straightforward deck. Every card is a non-creature card that draws or exiles. Field goes from non-existent to giant in 2 turns

They warned us.

My gift to everyone, feel free to save the image and upload separately, as memes have always intended

In your will make sure you leave a clause stating that you want a web camera in your casket, so you can have a deadstream! Livestreams are so last lifetime.

This combo isn't the greatest combo in magic, but it is my current favorite. My goal in every game is just to make so many tokens that copy tokens thar create mice~ #MTG #MagicTheGathering #MTGShenanigans #Shenanigans #GamesAreForFun #CompetitiveIsBoring #Shenanigans4Life

Almost heaven, West Atlantic, Blue fin tunas, freshwater crabs in rivers. Crabs are bold there, walling cross the street! Crossing over blacktop, growin' like a breeze. Crab-tree road! Take me home, to the crabs, and sea foam! West Atlantic, crabby mama. Take me home, crab-tree road~

So the sequel to Small Soldiers is just going to take place in real life at your tech bro neighbor's house

Can BlueSky add the option to "continue seeing content like this, but just not literally this same exact meme I've seen 200 times" because that is the feature I need the most

As you drive along the road you see the city aprawling before you. It's bigger than any place you've been before, and it isn't just the buildings. You feel some oppressive force, warning you that this place won't give you second chances, but you feel the much stronger call of hope it offers. Ride on

This is forever my favorite magic the gathering card, because it just combos so beautifully with a few other cards. Have you ever hit someone eith 50 stacks of 7 entry effects?

Suggestion to all game devs. If animating all of those walk cycles is getting hard, consider giving your characters Heeleys! Jist pose and glide like the coolest kid in school

To answer the question, yes, you have to. The costume is the reason for the event. It's also your payment for the party. "Sorry, I know you put in the effort to put this on, but can I contribute nothing whatsoever? What's the least I can contribute to your enjoyment?" That's what your question means

I love the "misunderstanding how motion works" theory of time travel! Objects only move in relation to other objects! The Earth, and all other things in the universe, are moving at all speeds in all directions at all times! So, this time machine is anchored to the sun for some reason? Weird choice.

Voynich Manuscript hypothesis. It's not code or anything like that. The writing faded over time, and someone touched up the letters! Whoever touched it up either didn't know that language and "fixed" letters incorrectly or was illiterate and did the same. This solves most of the translation issues.

Most websites will accept PenisPen15Pen!$ as a strong password, and you already remember how to type it! This works with most vulgarities, or any other word that makes you giggle!

Apparently Inktober 2 is Weave, even if Rachel says her hair is totally real! @raccoongirl.bsky.social #webcomics #racoongirl #DatingScottWouldGetKinky #inktober #halfassedinktober #5minutesOrLess

The first day of Inktober was Mustache, and I'm only a meme artist! Read Raccoon Girl! Rachel is cute and deserves more fan art! #raccoons #raccoon #raccoongirl #raccoonappreciation

When you’re bringing the warmth and love like the ray of sunshine you are and someone STILL has to test you

Repost with a character that would make for an excellent shitposter. He works ONE day per year as far as anyone knows. Maybe a few weeks of planning and logistics, but he has the free time

What's your favorite plot hole people like to leave in their comics? I for one, love when people forget that Dare Devil and Superman both know who's under any mask. Super hearing means your mask hides nothing, and most people physically cannot change their voice to be unrecognized reliably!

Slightly diminish a book The Canterbury Tale (just the one)

Slightly diminish a book Baron of One (1) Ring.

So, someone should get Gangle into 3D printing so she can make her own masks out of flexible bio-plastic or the wood-resin kind so it doesn't feel fake. Plus, she would be GREAT at designing once she got used to the software! #TADC

Sinner is playing Auger-Aliassime at the US Open, and after his movie did so well in March. This guy must be busy between Tennis and working with Michael B. Jordan

Happy patLabor day to the giant mech fans out there who celebrate! youtu.be/V4ZikoCwqOA?...

So, do people know that most stores are actually designed to keep you in them for a certain specific amount of time? Smaller stores shift items up and down, but never big changes. This makes you look at everything, but quickly! Larger stores shift everything so you have to check the whole place!

Why? What did I do wrong?

Every time someone posts a thirst trap or fetish content with no adult tags, I assume they want children to see it. They aren't nudity tags, they're "this is intended for adults" tags. Who do you want seeing them?

Wendy's is out here stealing Taco Bell's official slogans like it's nothing. This is written on every taco 12 pack in invisible ink, but we all know it's true and it's there.

I shop this lonely road. The only stores that I have ever known. Don't know where their sewn. But they have my size, and I shop alone. I shop this empty street To the Boulevard of Broken Seams Made from fresh sheered sheeps. And I'm the only one, and I shop alone I shop alone, I shop alone

To every ant in the world, you are unfathomably ancient. For every greenland shark, you 6 at most be a young adult. And to every redwood, you will never be more than a child. We are all ancient infants within this cosmos And these edibles are HITTING

Which one do you prefer, dried bananas, or moistened bananas?

LMAOBTAID (laughing my ass off because the alternative is despair)

A parliament of owls gathered to start a conspiracy of ravens to begin a murder of crows. Though a single ferret ignored this, as this wasn't the business of ferrets. . . . I hope it's not the worst pun you've herd

One time I followed someone and they immediately followed me back so I got scared and blocked them. This may have been an overreaction, but I am roughly 20x more scared of things on the internet than in tral life

The most likely death in the world is dying of heart disease on a Tuesday. Tuesday is statistically the most stressful day, since you have almost the whole week ahead of you, but you've had a day of losing whatever the weekend helped you gain. Basically I'm saying Tyr is killing people. It's his day

Every cat owner has the cutest cat. Just ask them! This sweet old lady is Roxy and she prefers to sleep on top of humans whenever she can.

Keb Mahal playing with Tajmo and sounding great!

Does every webcomic artist know that the Butts represented Tooting for 70 years? @zachweinersmith.bsky.social @xkcd.com @ass.golf @danshive.bsky.social @oglaf.bsky.social Add any other web comic artists. They'll use this information better than I am able to.

Is setting a gingerbread house on fire arson, or just burning calories?

People keep following, but no one liked the music meme so I have to keep the real weird ones in my mind. We could have avant-jazz and Smurf rock, but no, only one like means we only get a modern bard who sings with the voices of a cadre of frightening children.

Sure, for every like I will spread chaos and confusion in the form of "music"