martinelli incident tonight just hammers home the fact that arteta has managed to turn a team generally associated with pretty decent football in the premier league era into a team that goes about doing stuff that's both really unpleasant and ultimately ineffectual

westminster cathedral looking lovely for epiphany!

bought a baron bigod, forgot to take it home for christmas, did a little riff on a tartiflette for dinner and it turned out really very good

i love it when tfl decides that your destination is the true name of god

been a banner year for the festive pints

economic update: my fiancée has just called for price controls on london borough of jam products

KIM KITSURAGI - “You need to get your shit together.” YOU - “But I don't wanna get my shit together!” KIM KITSURAGI - “Then the world will turn away from you, and leave you behind.”

“hey do you want some labudu-“ You bolt awake in the mountains of Carthage. You are not online. It is 217 BC. You are the general Hannibal, and you have changed your mind. The future cannot come to pass. Rome must burn.

Really do love this fella.

Chiesa rapidly finding ways to become the absolute love of my life

the rat by the walkmen really is just an absolute all timer isn’t it

If you want a picture of the future, imagine a late Liverpool goal— forever.

quite laid back about my birthday until the colin the caterpillar comes out

late goals for liverpool… it can’t keep happening can it?

gravenberch is such a joy to watch isn’t he

SHIVERS - In a little alley next to Boogie street, a man in stained overalls steps out of a workshop for a cigarette. His hands are bruised and soaked with motor oil and dirt. He breathes smoke out of his nostrils and closes his eyes. The next five minutes are his and his alone.

my first ever 0-0 at five a side tonight. no subs, rainy whitechapel night, went in goal for the last bit and was going full neil warnock by the end

local bar having summer party, and the forest gate dads are absolutely battering interpol on the karaoke

Szoboszlai has just been so good. He’s covering right back, he’s been absolutely everywhere and then he does that. Absolutely incredible. Love him to bits.

single issue voter on the issue of outlawing refcam

i think because i grew up watching the wenger era of henry, pires, etc, i’ve just got a very firm idea of arsenal which is nothing like Actually Existing arsenal, who manage to be extremely physical and aggro off the ball and made of papier-mâché while on it

never wanted anyone to just put their foot through it more than i did virgil then

cruelly banned by my fiancée from buying this in the kew garden gift shop and wondering if this wedding malarkey is worth it

man united have gone to live on a farm far away, where there's lots of grass and space for them to run around in. no, we can't visit.

i've actually always been a grimsby town fan

if we can’t do something song-wise with that absolutely phenomenal lad and duran duran we should just dissolve the club

watching local non league team (beloved clapton cfc) and oppo centre back has just smashed it into someone’s back garden with a huge scream of ‘fuck off’ - the game has never been so back

having done a bit of work in sunderland over the last year, watched a game at the stadium of light etc, coming back in from a night out to them being first on match of the day is just really nice

football is so fucking back

I want the finest wines available to humanity. I want them here, and I want them now.

Was absolutely beaming when this came up as Thursday's album, made for a joyous commute.

just had to explain a bitter shandy to the lad behind the bar, game’s gone

Rio Ngumoha looks the absolute business doesn’t he. always boss when a youth player pops up with goals in pre season but ‘takes on half of bilbao’s defence and buries it’ feels significantly different from ‘scores a scruffy rebound’

by the end of this paragraph i was weeping and singing the national anthem

third time where we just need to pull it back to the edge of the box, going crackers here

bit muggy out? stick a bueno in the freezer for three hours, criminally underrated treat

Something something Ways of Saving by Ann-Katrin Berger…there’s a banger tweet to be written but I can’t find it.

that’s some save from berger that, bloody hell

i've actually always been a fan of the swiss women's team

just found out that you can get a colin the caterpillar wedding cake and he's got a little top hat on. updating the wedding spreadsheet at speeds you wouldn't believe.

I'm in this week's @schoolsweek.bsky.social talking about one of the key findings of the Commission into Countering Online Conspiracies in Schools: demographics aren't the place to be looking - but if we're going to, we need to look further than just boys. schoolsweek.co.uk/our-fight-ag...

'This should never be allowed. We would never tolerate this kind of risk in another part of a child’s life, so shouldn’t tolerate it for children’s education' The @childrenscomm.bsky.social on her blueprint to reform the unregistered AP system schoolsweek.co.uk/unregistered...

Copying @heatherlafferty.bsky.social and doing one random album a day from 1001 Albums You Must Hear Before You Die. Going to be posting them here. You can do the same thing, if you've got three years and you're a weird completionist and/or want less algorithmic curation: 1001albumsgenerator.com

A fantastic discussion - thank you to all panellists!

I'm at @educationfest.bsky.social today with other members of Public First's education team! You can find us in the Chapel, hosting the Public First Debates. These conversations are looking at four areas we know teachers, parents, and pupils are all concerned about, and important for our system.

i remember when it used to be just called ‘ingham’. not anymore though.

it’s extremely important, when finding yourself in a tiki bar in leyton, to ask for ‘one lager and the stupidest cocktail you have’

buddy i'm gonna level with you. your 3 for £8 selection is unhinged. totally unbalanced. flavour profile is honestly grotesque. i'm gonna have to ask you to leave the picnic

honestly had no strong opinions about foxes until i got into gardening and now i want some kind of ‘stand your ground’ law in defence of my hydrangeas.

overcome with a sudden need to ensure that ryan gravenberch knows that i, personally, love him