I really need some new pants which actually fit me with at least a decent quality, preferably baggy or wide pants in black!! does anyone have some recs for me? I’ve been looking for some subcul pants for a while now but my hips are too wide for most of them I fear.. ;-;

helloo im a lil away from my phone rn and trying to focus on gaming and my interests🤍 I hope y’all are doing well, I’m getting better and better and my antidepressant dose got increased so I’m hoping to get more things done again aahh

i wanna get hiiiiiigggghhhh

how can I heal my nervous system asking for a friend ~

See, I don't even want my idols to know I exist. I can like them from afar, consumimg their media is way enough

Yaoi vape

sorry for my inactivity lately.. I’ve been having a very intense bpd episode for a few weeks now but I’m slowly feeling better and more calm now.. ah.. I forgot how bad it can actually get, I feel so drained and exhausted now

aaaa sorry for my inactivity, a lot as happened lately and Im veryyy emotional in a good but also in a bad way and Ig Ive got a new fp.. a second one and well im very happy about that but also a little overwhelmed ngl I hope y’all are doing well !! 🤍🤍🤍

on days like these I’m giving up on the thoughts of ever getting through all the traumatic things that ever happened to me.. but I feel like I have no choice, I need to keep going even though I can’t really enjoy my life anymore, only when I’m far away from home at my partner’s place.. I can forget

tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired tired

I’m sadly not able to be that active on my socials rn because I’m very overwhelmed, stressed and burned out ;-;.. that’s also why I couldnt reply to some of your replies yet .. even tho I appreciate them very much and will answer asap, promise!! 🤍 hope y’all are doing well tho🤍

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when you can’t afford merch from your niche interests, so u have to make it yourself.. ;^; (Angel’s Egg’s left, Drakengard 3 on the right)

is anyone else recovering from a rly bad autistic burnout and kinda unable to do anything .. ;-;

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I really need to slow down today, I overdid it again and pushed myself too hard the last two days.. I can’t wait to lay down soon after work.. ;~;

its really frustrating if you’re open for recovery theoretically but you’re just not physically or mentally able to do it yet like to actually get better, break the habits and be more healthy.. being too self-aware really hurts sometimes, I feel like I’m in control but like.. also not really? .. ‹/𝟹

I rly wanna make a carrd or linktree but I’m so drained lately ;-; ..

good morning ~ 🤍

another food post aa~ I need to share it because I somehow managed to cook even though today was fully loaded and exhausting so pls pls be proud of me (ㅅ´ ˘ `) 🤍

I met up with a local transmasc today to get a few packs of tgel bc I’m running out soon and can’t get it myself rn (its delayed bc of complicated reasons rn ugh) and it lowkey felt like a drug deal lmao ..😭

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I think I wanna make a brother nier ita bag when my financial situation gets better aa I love him so much, he is one of my alltime fav characters and also my biggest kin 🤍

my tl on twt is going crazy about the new tnc figures (understandable) I think this is my sign to finally play the game, I only watched the anime as a preteen when it came out ..🧍‍♂️but I loved it soo much

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new moot calling me a doll just made my entire life ngl 🤍

I wish I had more money ;-;

I feel like everyone is getting better and I'm still stuck in this loop of depression and obbession

Friday Evening, I’m in a call with gf while watching stuff on watch2gether, I’m having Ramen n snaccs and playing Drakengard 🤍 never kill yourself fr 😭

oh my god I found one of my dream dolls on my local thrift side sksk- i’d be unstoppable if I can afford her hopefully somewhere next month 😭

moots with bpd pls help a boy out: I’ve been very depressed since I’m away from my fp again, its been weeks and I’m still not motivated to do anything- how do y’all cope the best? What’s helping me the most is engaging with my special interests but I cant get myself to start things ..😭 whelp

my qyute discord profile

this week was so goddamn exhausting I caaaant anymore

And so starts my 2nd year with HRT 🏳️‍⚧️ I'm so fucking proud of me that I was able to make that step last year and formed my way to the me I always wanted to be. It's still a very long way until I reach that point I feel happy in my body tho... But this year showed me that there is a way to reach it 💖

god I need to stay of twt its full of trans discourse, negativity and transphobia especially towards trans men rn Im just sick of it ..

Yeah okay now I kinda get what they meant with the phase “testosterone makes it impossible to cry” ..🧍‍♂️ I’ve been having silent mental breakdowns for months BUT it has gotten way less since I’ve started t

what a goddamn awful day 🧍‍♂️

wish my voice was deep already .. 🧍‍♂️ I only hear a very small difference after 4 months, I’m so inpatient.. My voice is very hoarse like basically everyday since I’ve started T but I read that it’s a good sign ;w;..

Save me subcul jirai, save me (╥﹏╥)

I dont wanna turn into a food blog but I dont have that much to post rn and I’m trying to recover from my ed so I’m very happy if I manage to cook sometimes for myself, especially after an exhausting day.. 🥲🤍

Ahh I got called sir by one of my bosses, that already made my day hehe..~

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can relate ..😭

I wanna meet with people, I wanna get into make-up again, I wanna play games and touch grass more.. but I’ve got 0 energy and will to do things.. I just wanna be with my boywife again..😭

how can I stop hearing the voices to get a haircut everytime my hair has grown out a bit and I plan on growing it out even more.. I wanted to grow it out for over a year now but the voices won everytime ..😭

regarding art: here are some of my low effort nier replicant doodles

I really need to leave twt behind and start posting here instead aaa 😭 but my tl is just so damn good, like I get posts from all of my special interests n hyperfixations there.. my tl is so empty here :(.. I wish more artists would start posting on here instead but I get it its hard to get reach

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