okay these Starbucks positivity messages are out of pocket

USE YOUR SELF-REVIVE KYLER

The year is 2033. Daniel Jones is on his 6th team in 8 years. After defeating some young buck in a summertime QB battle, Jones wins. One year later they will be placing a transition tag on him, probably.

Yet* never been good yet* never won anything yet*

I think coming up with the bit is nature, and committing to it is nurture?

One of the cool parts about being a parent is that one day your kid will start a bit without you knowing, because you can’t imagine a world like that yet, but then the bit grows and the kid is committed to the bit and suddenly you realize your kid is funnier than you and you want to do the bit, too

For all the mock draft enthusiasts. March is your time to…shine? I guess? Presenting: “Chasing Mocks”

Feels relevant again. Don’t let them fool you with the watermelon seeds. comfort-moods.beehiiv.com/p/watermelon...

“This is fucking embarrassing. Get rekt you fucking idiot.” - me, who cannot parallel park.

I’m the only person over 8 wearing hearing protection at this monster truck show. Is this a bad time to tell everyone inner ear hair cell damage is permanent?

Saints can’t lose tonight, baby!

Make sure everyone around you knows about your hole in one

momma is going to her first monster jam tonight. unfortunately, I hate loud noises.

Perhaps there are no more drives for Carr.

Touchin grass

Talking trade seekers, Old-Head QBs, and Dynasty Keep/Trade/Fade with @peteroverzet.bsky.social youtu.be/tpZrb-RkUdI?...

This is a WR post if I've ever seen one...

The coffee percolates for me in the dark of the morning. Its drips drip drips are the treat and I am nothing more than Pavlov’s dogs.

The coffee pot beeps for only me.

Reading before bed but stopping yourself from falling asleep over and over again is intellectual goon maxxing.

The year is 2029. Children are on playgrounds. They mock and ridicule each other like children do. “Joe momma!” they say. Joe? I remember a Joe. I even loved a Joe once. What ever happened to Joe? But the playground brings me no solace. There are no answers in the swings.

really leaning into a non-monogamous reading style

Munich is 6 hours ahead of EST so the game will be over before we even get to see it, guys.

How Does Javonte Williams Getting Paid Affect Kenneth Walker? PLUS: How much does the NFL draft combine matter? www.fantasylife.com/articles/fan...

felt sleepy, but watched an entire episode of a show with my husband without snoozin a single time

“I’m being told if Canada wins, they’re giving us maple syrup. If USA wins, they’re giving us glyphosate-based herbicides.”

If CAN USA goes into overtime, do both teams get possession of the ball in the event of a touchdown?

my child paints my toenails black. the cold liquid chemicals coat my skin in abundance. she sings the song of our generation in decibels and pitches only known to the young. “gonna be gonna be golden. Gonna be gonna be golden”she repeats it like a mantra. My feet are ugly, but my heart is full.

the coffee knows me by name and it calls out to me in whispered tones

When someone named Duncan asks about the hot gossip surrounding the government ordered release of UFO records

“Every August, you draft way too many rookies above their ADP.”

Fucking tease

I found my home league on bourbon street

I found your mom on bourbon street

I found some gentlemen on bourbon street

“We’re not meant to live the 1-Person Walkman Experience.” comfort-moods.beehiiv.com/p/breaking-w...

I guess my kid set a reminder

10:48am: second hard seltzer cracked Mardi Gras mambo, bitches

Happy Valentine’s Day

Happy Valentine’s Day

The Dynasty Fantasy Football Pack. This will be updated constantly. If you know someone who should be on here (yourself included), let me know. go.bsky.app/FabMRvE

trying to stay locked in at work for 24 more hours knowing Mardi Gras break is about to hit

these discarded Mardi Gras beads have been hanging on for a year now. Left over. Forgotten. Ignored. But this weekend, they’ll be celebrated again. there’s a metaphor in there somewhere, probably.

BlueSky has drafts now!

I imagine this feels exactly like running from your back yard, to your piggy bank, and immediately out into the street to catch the ice cream truck before it exited the neighborhood