Rank heresy. Twizzlers taste like delicious red with a snap and hard chew, and Red Vines taste like sad pointless red with a softer but still gummy chew.

Perhaps I'm silly but I think the President of the United States doesn't get a pass on "UwU poow Twumpie was TWICKED into waw with Iwwan WAAAHHHH" FFS I have to take more accountability than that, and I make video games, not life-and-death decisions.

This kind of content is why I won’t give up on the internet

I took a remarkably good if extremely introductory geopolitical theory class when I was 19. We discussed at least half a dozen easy ways Iran could do this and why that required careful treatment and planning should we engage them. We were high school kids. Not military pros.

I wonder if the drugs were pouring in through the same waters that California diverts from wildfires into the ocean because of smelt. Wouldn't that be something else? ... and because this is the Internet, I guess I should clarify: /s

Like many aging dudes, I have low T. Exogenous testosterone leads to infertility, and I was still trying to conceive, so that wasn't a treatment option. The option I settled on was off-label use of a generic drug, as prescribed by my urologist. I'd bet cash money nobody calls that a "conspiracy."

A reminder that there is no statutory or constitutional mechanism to suspend the midterms, even with a war. There were elections during the Civil War. States run elections, not the federal government. And any state that cooperates to not hold them would find it has no Reps as of Jan 3, 2027.

I was ejected from a full speed car crash on the highway and walked away virtually uninjured.

I'm not going to link the video of what appears to be a US Senator committing an assault that ends with breaking the arm of a servicemember, but serious question: Would any civilian in normal circumstances legally be permitted to cause that level of injury to make someone move from a spot?

I'd like to thank the monkeys who got us to this point. I mean actual monkeys, not being pejorative toward AI or legal people. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monkey_...

Admin: Free markets! Anthropic: has license terms Admin: WAIT NO NOT FOR US www.nytimes.com/2026/02/27/u...

Questions that need to be asked, *now*, by lawmakers, the media and the public: 1) Why is the Trump administration allowed to attempt to destroy companies they don't personally like? 2) Why does the DoD want unlimited surveillance of US citizens? 3) Why does the DoD want AI-driven killbots?

I feel a real civic duty to stay informed and pay attention, but I didn’t watch The Stupid and only skimmed summaries. Somehow, amidst all this crazy ignorance, I still have to stay sane and earn money to support myself and family. Some days I just have to tune out.

1. Donald Trump is an incurious idiot who can be persuaded by something as simple as a bad Photoshopping. 2. Tariffs replacing income tax would be massively regressive. 3. The techbroligarchy has developed and controls easy-use deepfake tools. And has seized seats of genuine political power.

If taxpayers will fund it, I am willing to have sex on only a $5M Cessna jet. This is now my official electoral platform. See, it’s already saving you tens of millions! reason.com/2026/02/13/h...

I remember a time when we didn't even know who the WH budget director WAS, much less need to steal money from global soft power efforts and cause hundreds of thousands of deaths to provide a 7-figure security budget for him/her. www.reuters.com/world/us/whi...

Any job can be stressful but I genuinely enjoy mine. As a bonus, it would never be a useful performance hack to inject hyaluronic acid into my junk so that’s one temptation I can cross off the list.

Age verification? This was my first software storage device.

I didn’t watch Bad Bunny (I had a class). I’m not especially a fan. I’m neutral. That’s totally OK. All art doesn’t have to be for me to be good. I hope his fans enjoyed the show. And I’m happy a wildly popular artist posted record viewership.

No new pictures. Where are you mentally?

I also love citing this line. And for more fun, now it’s often black!

I see occasionally-entertaining threads about "When It Happens" and I'm simultaneously struck with: 1. I don't wish death on anyone. 2. Some people will, however, improve the world most by leaving. 3. I've never seen this so... widespread on any socials before. 4. Fine, I'll stock some champagne.

Stop with these jokes if you’re a core fan. She’s just gonna boo ya, base.

Harvard is “woke” while the Department of Defense wants you to use its new preferred name

I look forward to someday visiting Orange Emoluments Airport and Shit Myself During a Presser Station.

What almost annoys me the most about this email is that not only is Pokemon Go not the first location-based "augmented game," it's not even the first AR game BY NIANTIC! ingress.com/en

I present the current Winner of the Internet

Despite all that is bad in the US, at least this weekend will be the Winter Olympics, where we get to watch grown adults attempting things like riding cafeteria trays down ice pipes at subsonic speeds. There is hope for humanity.

I hear Renee Good and Alex Pretti can’t eat in restaurants either, due to some murdering snowflakes.

I went to a rural diner. Here’s what local patrons have to say about Philip Glass. “If I want music that’s going nowhere, what’s wrong with Kid Rock?” “I don’t approve of his getting political today but Einstein on the Beach ended up a sublime drum corps arrangement.”

I once did a minimalist musical arrangement of the play Philip Glass Buys a Loaf of Bread and despite the fact that I know the “Glass, minimalist” jokes are overdone, I salute his creative works and integrity. www.nytimes.com/2026/01/27/a...

I know when I'm investigating fraud, I also select staff who has been credibly accused of taking a bribe that I've chosen to stop investigating.

Oh no, the secret police are sad.

Tomorrow would be a great day to file articles of impeachment against everyone from Bovino to Trump for obstruction of justice and violation of constitutional rights. If the murders aren’t clear enough (I get law can be weird), the obstruction of investigations sure is.

I don’t want to hear anything from an elected official unless it’s a plan to defund the DHS and impeach Noem, Bovino, etc. No texts. No emails. No talk about the economy. Step up or step off.

This seems like a good time to remind folks that up to date iOS devices lock and require PIN before accepting Face ID again if you hold power and volume up for two seconds as though you were powering it off. Which you can also do from there.

It is important to keep repeating this, because these 23 people continue to get complete free passes every day while the fascism & incineration of American national security keep happening.

Reminder: All it would take to end the murder of American citizens by an untrained government goon squad is 16 Republicans in Congress voting with Dems to defund ICE (or 23 to impeach and remove Trump — 3 in House & 20 in Senate). That’s it. 23 Americans can vote for the public and end all of this.

I encourage ICE agents to attempt to avoid future criminal penalties by self-abolishing the agency. Since subtlety doesn't work online, I will clarify that this means quitting your dishonorable jobs.

A government that willfully disregards the law may still legally enjoy its protections but morally does not deserve them.

To repeat: Abolish ICE.

Articles of impeachment for aiding and abetting murder are a moral imperative. This government cannot be allowed to continue unchecked. Democrats must use the tools they have, however impotent, to try to stop it. If the thugs block it, history can show that they did something bigger than sad tweets.

I watched the video so you don’t have to. The murder victim, who may well have been carrying legally and was not brandishing his weapon, was beaten and disarmed before any shots are heard. ICE must be dismantled and the earth salted.

This is also a great reminder that based on the sum of all communications over the last year, we should by default assume the federal government is lying unless demonstrated otherwise.

ICE is now responsible for 66% of the homicides in Minneapolis this year.

By supporting murder in the streets, this administration shows again that it is fundamentally illegitimate and must be removed.

This raises a tangent for me. Hiring managers out there: if you work in a workplace that still values diversity, and someone with *these jobs* on their resume showed up on your desk, what would it take for you to believe that they could exercise good judgment in that environment?

I'm not a doctor or medical researcher, but isn't it a straightforward violation of medical ethics to withhold a proven-safe treatment as part of experimentation? I genuinely believe a sanctioned study would disallow this.

There is no reforming this. Abolish ICE. Impeach all the way up. I don't care if it's currently a doomed effort, impeachment is a goddamned privileged resolution and you can introduce it every Monday. The Bill of Rights is not a suggestion.

The Democrats should shut down the government on this sentence alone.