Call me an old sentimental but I miss the days when war criminals faced repercussions and not promotions.

My little homosexual heart

Lidl here with an incredibly disappointing fruit to fibre ratio. First pour I genuinely believed we’d accidentally bought bran flakes, or that contents may have settled during transit. No such luck.

Does anyone know what time we’re getting raptured? Just need to know if I should get ready for work.

My kingdom for a simple smokey look that will embiggen my eyes 😔

‘Melania, stay perfectly still. It’s vision is based on movement’

Overheard on train platform Kid: Mum, I don’t know why some trains have the smoke coming out and some don’t. Mum: Well, I don’t know why you’re talking with your mouth full Successfully deflected Mama, scalp that kid.

I mean sure the hand, but literally nothing about how this man looks is normal. He looks like stewed tea with half a digestive dropped in.

Post a movie you like with a terrible Rotten Tomatoes score

Melania meeting Kate:

We don’t talk enough about how keysafes are some of the most appallingly designed things in existence.

Never seen Tate McRae and the flag of the Isle of Man in the same room. Makes you think.

When you text someone for the first time of the day, do you start with ‘hi’ or whatever? I usually just go in with whatever I want to say but I’m now wondering if that might be considered rude?

Zack Polanski tells voters there is no "time to wait around" for Corbyn party New leader urges left-leaning voters to "join the Green Party right now". www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home...

@zackpolanski.bsky.social pointing out that a household budget is nothing like a national economy.

"Zack Polanski said it was 'rank hypocrisy' for Nigel Farage to call for Angela Rayner's resignation and not to do so himself." inews.co.uk/news/green-p...

"Keir Starmer is doing everything he can to alienate people at every moment, from the two-child benefit cap, the disability cap, his refusal to attack the super-rich, and of course the ongoing genocide in Gaza.” @zackpolanski.bsky.social 👏👏👏 🟩 It's time to join the Green Party ⤵️

Can’t believe I did an accidental #fcf yesterday and none of you even noticed

Spilled beetroot salad down myself. That’s what I get for trying to be healthy after a night out.

Also I did a zoom interview for a new project last week and the lighting was chefs kiss.

New username because snoopers be snoopin’

I just really like green, ok

I’m too scared to do a skittle because I don’t think anyone in it would know who I am

I’ll always return to the streets I grew up on

Introducing a ‘box of charity shop tat’ bonus prize in my quizzes and I’ve just had the BEST time rooting through the bins at cancer research ❤️

RT if you also wish ill upon JK Rowling.

Gutted as we were not to see Rob Madge in Cabaret tonight (they were the reason we booked, after all), the understudies were INCREDIBLE.

Ah shit here we go again

Rihanna is Smurfette

Um. Thanks EE but I’m literally just laying on my bed; why do I feel like I’m being told off by an exasperated parent?

Behold. The rare tanned ginger.

Don’t kinkshame me, NYT.

‘This message has not been downloaded from the server’ Ok? So..

Club sandwiches are so bizarre. Not once have I been eating a sandwich and thought ‘You know what this needs? More bread’

Voted for @zackpolanski.bsky.social for Leader of the Green Party. I haven’t been this excited about a politician for a long time; I really think this could be the start of something huge for the Greens.

Is it just me or has there been a recent explosion of onlyfans bot accounts?

⏳Final week to sign up to the Green Party. 🗳️ Vote for Bold Leadership on August 1st.

People still defending that nurse:

Minute Cryptic - 28 July, 2025 "Please... shaken not stirred" (6) 🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣 I scored: 2 under par www.minutecryptic.com?utm_source=s...

Woah, that transphobic nurse the Sensibles have all come out to bat for has turned out to be a colossal, open & unabashed racist???

You should try Hero Assistant, a cool new assistant app to run your day: apple.co/4kvzwUp

Minute Cryptic - 27 July, 2025 "Business disinfected casino to conceal triple murder, perhaps?" (3) ⚪️⚪️🟣🟣🟣🟣 I scored: 1 under par www.minutecryptic.com?utm_source=s...

I just… I just think you boys are all so handsome

@codenamesgame.bsky.social ‘Because how much we care about irreparable harm being done to a marginalised community is directly proportionate to how much money we can make by doing business with a reprehensible fascist’ #savedyouaclick

Talking about first mobiles with friends and they’re like ‘omg I can’t believe my first phone was a 4S, like it didn’t even have WhatsApp’ Meanwhile here’s mine:

WHY HAVE I ONLY JUST DISCOVERED THIS

Minute Cryptic - 23 July, 2025 "Nineties freestyle icon known for his energetic MC work?" (8) ⚪️🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣🟣 I scored: 3 under par www.minutecryptic.com?utm_source=s... Ok this is one of my favourites ❤️

It’s weird that the implication was we somehow had an issue with biological ‘sex’ being taught. When was it ever not? You can see the fearmongering in this wording. The issue is the teaching that anyone who doesn’t fit within those boundaries is wrong.

Spending my morning researching which brand of fruit ‘n’ fibre has the best fruit to fibre ratio because I refuse to go gently into my late 30’s with a dearth of banana chip.