Want my stuff? ebay.us/m/b8GDd9

My view on relationships you ask? If her heart's not bespoke, I don't want it. No heart is truly bespoke.

It's so hard to feel Fall festive when it's 87⁰

I can't wait for this lady a few tables over to finish her chips 😡

🤣🤣🤣

You would think with how much I feed the birds at work, (not just crows, all birds matter) they would give my car a pass🤬

@mightymite.bsky.social I hope tomorrow's tots are made with extra love ❤️ and whoever makes them put a few extra in the bag. Sleep well and please think about taking a 3 day weekend soon ☺️

I love those giant skeletons.

A relieved mind made all the difference 😌

Everyday is a special occasion when you think about it. Enjoy every minute with those you love while you can ❤️

Was it considered cheating if you turned it upside down?

I take back my post about celebrating the day of the dead by thinking about my dreams and goals. Many have gone up in flames, but the game is far from over ❤️

I'll be celebrating dia de los muertos by thinking about my hopes, dreams, and goals.

Naughty nurses matter everyday, not just on Halloween!

Some nights you have to listen to Audioslave while plotting out the short and long term.

@mightymite.bsky.social I bet your mom loved the flowers you sent her. I know it made her birthday extra special! Sleep well and keep fighting the good fight my friend 💪

Not one of the numbers from my dream matched 😕

I'd watch this😁

Suspense movie, missiles are headed toward our position in a bunker. Close-up of my character just going to town on a piece of birthday cake.

I had a dream about 4 numbers and woke up and wrote them down. Naturally I have to play daily 4 today.

"To look at the animal is to confront another mode of existence, complete in itself and closed to ours." - José Ortega y Gasset Going to post one of these every day as a reminder. More at bit.ly/world-revisited #nature #biodiversity #veganism #animalethics

Girls may wanna have fun, but this guy wants to go nite nite 🥱

BBs 🥹

Me: That's not what your mom said last night 😡 Also me: Yeah she said you haven't been taking care of yourself

Rare moment when a deaf taxi driver picks up a deaf passenger. 😊 When a deaf passenger takes a ride with a deaf Didi driver, the moment they share a smile has touched many people! Source: 人民日报 via China Daily #smiles #instant #hapiness #taxi

One time, many moons ago, this guy had an issue with me going to Vegas over a weekend, without missing a second of work, by the way. Supposedly it wasn't good to be out there with all the sinners. All of my sins have been consensual. Too bad he can't say the same 🖕

INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE FOR THE DAY: PRACTICE WHAT YOU PREACH, OR SHUT THE FUCK UP.

My warranty is now through age 55🥰

I want to start a dating service where for a large fee, I'll secretly record how a potential partner shops. I'll rate them by how much aisle space they take up and how fast they get what they need. I'll also include if they don't put items and carts back. Any investors??

A photographer caught me with some friends in Omaha on Saturday, it looks like plausible deniability is out the window and I'll forever be known as Anti-Fascist.

One time, 15+ years ago, this girl I worked with got mad at me for not having a thing for feet. Seriously mad! I know 😐 and I thought you should know too 😆

They are out in full force this morning ❤️

There's a high number of truck driver serial killers?

😆😆😆

I must have a hidden kink for reading books that are so hard to take in 🤕

I made myself smirk today 😂 One of my hundred bosses loves talking politics. Today she's going on and on about leaning right. I thought, you have 4 kids by 3 men. The only leaning you do is over. It made me laugh 🤣 goodnight.

Does anyone else see it or do I just have a dirty mind 🤔

😁🐸🐸

🎶🎶 Take me with you 🎶🎶

Just let me play the halftime show I write lyrics like Dylan Play the guitar like Hendrix Have the voice of Gaye The stage presence of Plant Of course these are the names of 4 kids screaming in a playground 😆

The HR candy dish is back 🥰 I will not be addressing the rumors about taking the head of HR to a Coldplay concert at this time 😆

Would you rather of the night: Be the reason a slow clap starts Be the one that starts the clap

🥰🐶👻

Who doesn't love a lint roller across the tum tum😍🐶

I was just talking to the neighbor about how fast someone was falling a few weeks ago 😞 Las Vegas skydiver dies after ‘landing accident’ in Perris – Press Enterprise share.google/exw4UN42u03G...

🤞🤞🤞

beware the 🦄 hey just sayin y'all. 😆