When I was 13, my parents got hardwood through the entire house. I had on thick soccer socks because I had practice in an hour. I ran & slid down the hallway, all the way into the bathroom, banged my knees & shins on the tub when I fell in. Practice sucked that day 🥴

Lmaoooo this is very me coded 😆

Bruhhh. Even when I took the one to confirm lil mama, I was shook to my core like I ain't pray so hard for that child, & wasn't married lmao 😆 I now love saying emphatically, "I don't have the equipment to be pregnant again"

That man Harlan Coben can WRITE a book & the British can ACT DOWN in a limited series!!!

Turn. This. Up. Asking about their relationship with their mama is one of the first questions that I ask to weed them out

I cut my hair like this MYSELF. (after I let them people down to the hair school play in my hair & fried my shit OFF)

Me & Panda Bear Jermaine during his last potty break of the evening 😑

peek = 🫣 peak = 🗻 pique = 👀

"You better put some respect on my sisters name!!!! She's a doctor so she deserves the best!!!"

This is probably the most accurate explanation

Im going to bop you upside the damn head.

Spoiler alert: they might for a little while but the truth will ALWAYS come out

Wanting a married man to leave his wife is so foolish. Actually, apply that to women leaving their husbands too. Do you really think they will treat you better? Absolutely not.

I don't even enjoy sending the nudes to a man I'm attracted to because I'm a very adorable dork...UNSOLICITED TO A MAN IDK OMGGGGG

Baked chicken thighs, boxed mac & cheese because I aint grating a MF thing, & collards that were in the freezer

The moment I realized reagans father had moved on while WE were still married & hadn't separated yet, that's when I said, BET. Now I'm aware folks be lying but I didn't

While I can't speak for all formerly married people, imma tell you like this in this video: we don't claim that person as soon as we decide we are getting a divorce. Yes by law we're married, but most separated folks EYE know, did not like their soon to be ex lol www.tiktok.com/t/ZThR9gDNt/

I'm trying to remember when my hand was broken back in 2022/2023. I aint eem gone hold you...I think I did but I had graduated to the removable brace lmao

I think $215 is all imma get for the GFM which is more than I thought I would get. I hate feeling like I have to post about it constantly to get traction. So I'll leave it be for a while.

Did I tell y'all that my parents GROWN ASS FRIENDS & FAMILY are sending my TikToks to my parents!? People truly do not grow up & I hate that for them

I will be asking That Man in about a week that same question after we have met. Will report back with his response lmao

Hey friend. Hand the phone here right now because why did you bring Flounder into this? He aint eem do nuffin!

As a former Jeep Grand Cherokee driver...no I couldn't see lmao

I feel seen, heard, & loved.

Being kind to others

I'm not great at a lot of things, but I'm a damn good mama!

How they made others feel in their worst moments

Time alone in silence.

Yes, because I always assume I've done something wrong.

My divorce & the situationships I've allowed myself to be in

Triple chocolate with caramel & pecans

Learn something

Getting in the bed after a long day

Bread, pasta, potatoes, rice. Keep in mind, id fuck these up no matter what

My daughter. No notes. God did His biggest one with her.

A blanket & bed, crochet hooks & yarn, socks, & a doggie that looks like PBJ

Lmaoooo the fact that I have said this exact statement before is FRYING me. Boiling hot with bleach.

My best friends Nicole & Ally. That Man. My daughter would have made her dad bring her to the house to put eyes on me.

2020-2024

Ironically, my 35th year has been the best. Looking forward to my 36th year

Chartreuse because the name makes it seems like it would be shade of white but it's a shade of green & ion like that deception

About a 4

My brain is fried hard like some wings. I took 3 days off from taking vyvanse AND IT SHOWS.

I know #TheWretchedMarriedPastor bet not eva bring his fluorescent beige ass back on this here app. The ONLY reason I ain't put him on the Jumbotron because of the children & his wife, because she reminded me of myself. But if he comes back on here...it's up & stuck for you, nigga!

Questions for the married niggas out there: 1) is your marriage based on traditional ideas of monogamy? 2) do you have shame? If you answered yes to either of these questions, maybe you shouldn’t get too comfortable in that lady’s inbox…

Im gonna try again tomorrow because HOLEE SHEET.

I have been trying to work all day & I even took my vyvanse & my brain is like...

6.

5.