Happy (late) IWD 👠 ❤️‍🔥 I wouldn’t be who I am today without the abundant love, support and community I’ve found among other brilliant SW. If you haven’t already, consider sending a tip to your favorite worker or making a donation to a SW-led organization today. 🥂

Gift idea: a bottle of particularly nice champagne for me to have on hand for When It Happens 🙏🍾

See you soon, Seattle ❤️‍🔥🌲☕️

Am I “available now”? No, I’m baking a rhubarb cake. Alice Coltrane’s “Journey in Sachidananda” is playing on vinyl in the other room. A summer thunderstorm is passing over and the screen door to the kitchen is open to the breeze. In other words I am Locked In

You were never looking for ordinary - neither am I.

Correction: I’ll be visiting Seattle 5/31 - 6/4! You know how to reach me 💌

Reminder to check your ✨spam folder✨ if you’re waiting on a response from me! Sometimes things end up over there despite our best efforts !

Pleasuremaxxing

Y’all heard her! Chop chop! 🤞🏻✈️😍

Seattle! I’ll be visiting for the very first time next month, 6/1 to 6/3 - show me around? Duos available with the one and only @crystalchambers.bsky.social and @lillyarlette.bsky.social 💘✨🌹🥂

Does having a 38lb pitbull as a daughter mean I qualify for Mother’s Day gifts? (Yes)

Just girls doing girly things, nbd @lillyarlette.bsky.social

🫣🫠

It hasn’t even been a month and I’m already missing NYC like crazy. Need a hottie to fly me back asap so we can try the MSG martini at Bonnie’s together.

I think a seafood tower would fix me

Babe, wake up, hot girl newsletter just dropped 👀

Everyone say hi to my extremely hot friend!! Or else!!

The one night I pass on meeting friends at the dive bar and decide to tuck myself into bed early is also apparently the night that David Byrne is hanging out at said bar. Please respect my privacy during this difficult time. 😭

Thinking about Anthony Bourdain’s slutty little earring

Just found out about an apparently incredible omakase spot in… Metairie?? Okay, who’s taking me?!

If you recognize this bathroom, you’re automatically sexy. I don’t make the rules.

The rumors are true

happy taurus season, let’s indulge 🕯️ 🍇 🦪 🥂 🌙 🍓

DJ on my local community station is either glitching or vibing tf out right now because they’ve played Warm Leatherette 3x in a row, not mad about it in either case

Lily and I look extremely good lounging in dappled light together btw

it’s National Dine Al Fresco With a Beautiful Woman Month, have you celebrated yet?

Good morning ✨🌿

I fear I’ve acquired yet another sexy hobby… someone take me back to the archery range as soon as possible. 🥵 🏹

Still getting my ass handed to me by seasonal allergies back home in New Orleans, but the difference here is everywhere smells like jasmine and magnolia so I am not even that upset

That was fun. Already looking forward to my next visit to my favorite city 🍎 🌆

As a avid garbage TV enjoyer, I cannot believe it took me this long to discover True Blood. Speechless.

Unbelievably perfect first date spent yapping about our nerdy little mutual interests (tabletop roleplaying games, the making of a perfect old fashioned, immaculate taste in sci fi) at Odo. Can’t wait for round two 🥵😍

had my eye on this girly forever and now she’s on sale… u know what they say, good things (exclusive sneak peek photos) happen to good people (boyfriends who send AP gift certificates)

the real reason I come to NYC this regularly is because I finally found the best eyebrow threading place on the face of the earth and it’s in the East Village

the Capitol One Cafe is a low vibrational space

He really gets me 🥹

NYC: I have a severe caviar deficiency and no plans Saturday… just some information for you…

Just went into the Diptyque store to browse and now I’m walking around Manhattan smelling my wrists every ten seconds

I love my life

Feeling really, really proud of myself - last month I met a major personal savings goal I’d been working toward, as well as completely redesigning my website from scratch! 🥹😊 If you’re proud of me too, my wishlist is in my bio 😘

Reading “Sky Daddy” at the airport lounge right now and somehow simultaneously praying someone asks about it and praying no one asks about it ✈️ 🥵

Happy spring, angels 💐

I’m so strong and independent until it’s time to put the duvet cover back on

😇

Wish you were here 😇

Given the projected (extremely frustrating) new changes to this app’s TOS, now seems like a great time to remind you to keep in touch by following my newsletter on substack if you haven’t already! ⚡️⚡️⚡️I hate this game 😒 substack.com/@averysimone

I don’t want to be glued to my phone ! I do not dream of creating content! I want to be in each others arms, hand feeding each other room service in bed, is that so much to ask?!

What’s your beach read?