Zodiac Ted just boarded a plane so I guess Texas will be getting a pretty severe storm.

1 cup of beans looks like such a small amount of food when it’s dry but BOY HOWDY do I have way too much after doubling the recipe.

If anyone from Target on the executive team is following me, we do not want the creepy santa next year, we didn't want his this year or the one before either.

I feel like as a Country, we did not need new seasons of My Strange Addition.

My entire 90s childhood.

$13/mo for Peacock and all I got this week was a box dye DA?

Sometimes I watch the news and wonder is this public intoxication?

I don't trust Penn or Teller and I still don't know which one is which.

My team is out so I'll just be celebrating the Super Bowl for the nacho cheese.

Will the people passing Presidents be the same ones doing cognitive testing on Congress? Asking for a friend. Me. I'm the friend.

I just watched The Perfect Neighbor........

Not sure what the occasion is but very thrilled that my neighbors still have fireworks on January 18th.

Listening to Good Charlotte singing Lifestyles of the Rich & the Famous in Prada is literally so rich.

Shawn Hatosy, I'm waiting.

WT(Mc)F is this 🤣 I made 20 give me the little one.

Almost 22 just told me AF1's are the new old people shoes, like New Balance dad shoes. I'm going to be sick.

Melatonin took me out for 9 hours. Who knew?

2 people were killed and the killer went to Raisin Canes for chicken tenders after.

I'm making chili so I'm going to need like 30 of you to stop by with Tupperware at around 330.

Making French Onion Soup. The long way.

You don't know what to get me? I'm 41, get me liqi-gel advil. That's it, you'll never go wrong.

Workplaces should be marked intorvert or extrovert friendly. I would love to work somewhere that nobody ever spoke to me.

I've got 2 Education Days to burn, someone find me a 2 day crime event that's happening virtually that I can somehow make a health related topic.

Was the gluten free cupcake I had the worst thing I've ever had? No. Would I ever waste the calories on one again? Also, no.

You want me to watch Landman without Billy? No. No dice.

Pizza Combos should be a narcotic based on addictability.

Tonight's the night!

Gia is ready for Valentine's Day

Watched the cops walking a guy around in handcuffs while he pointed around earlier this week towards the woods, now I'll have to wait 3 years for the Dateline.

I'm watching Murder Tapes and they pick the most unflattering photos of the victims. If anyone ever needs a photo to use of me, you have several here you can use any of those and y'all better not use my angry DL photo.

Super short staffed at work today. I am spraying everything at any desk I am working at with lysol.

This packaging is sending me. They are store brand Thin Mints.

The weather in Texas is absolutely unacceptable today.

The time I was in an elevator with Cruz and he thought I was starting struck but I had just never been in an elevator with the zodiac killer before or any other serial killer.

At brunch today I said that the Pope needs to bring back actually excommunicating people just for Vance. Go full, mid-16th century Europe on him.

World Market loves to show you the items they don't have in stock.

If The Pitt is setting us up for a Robbie motorcycle trauma, I'm out.... not really, I'll watch but I'm going to be mad.

Bauer let me try their new heated skates and I'm not sure these are for people who truly skate. It's very Chrsitmas in New York skating.

If we are going to "aquire" countries, can we at least get ones that have universal healthcare and keep that too?

#LGRW #FedorovRetirement #91

I need to report fraud. Never in the history of this franchise has any thing ever come out of it that could even be a distant cousin that looks like this.

My meal menu for the week has Breafast For Dinner for tomorrow night, this just means I'm having a mimosa.

Eye Doctor: It will be just a little puff of air. Little Puff Of Air:

I don't trust a perfectly round burger.

Wearing vintage Coach western/witchy boots today and I just know I'm going to be an absolute menace in them.

Should have called in so I could binge The Pitt.

I have text alerts for the school closings and delays for the school my Dad volunteers at so he doesn't go out on bad roads if he doesn't have to, I called him to tell him about a 2 hour delay and this man says: "Nice, more time for pancakes!' Parenting the elderly, a hopefully long story ❤️

Every Tuesday I clip my Dad's digital coupons for his local grocery store and every Tuesday he calls me to see if I've done it yet.