Tomorrow, potato salad.

My weekend plans.

My farming is coming along.

Same

Imagine hating me and I'm just in bed under the red light with a loops lip mask on, eye mask and loops concert earplugs in on a Friday night. Photo credit 22.... 😑

I have next week off and the first thing I did when I clocked out today was sleep for 3 hours.

I've been using crime/murder show lingo vs corporate jargon at work, I'd tell you more hut I'm keeping it close to the vest.

My new hoops if anyone wants to get in a good old American fist fight in an alley.

I just watched The Crash..... charge the parents too this time.

What kind of an asshole backs into a curbside pick up spot.....

Living in 2026 is not for the weak.

Pretty sure I am the only one in this Dairy Queen that doesn't have a felony or a black eye.

If assault had a taste.

Ordered this for my Dad, he's not the only one telling jokes around here.

Being loud in Barnes & Noble is like talking on speakerphone in Kroger. Trash.

My fridge died last night and that sums up the vibe.

Today is my work anniversary and I feel like I should have called in.

A man threw up on a zoom today, I'm not even sure what more needs to be said here.

I just asked 1942 if he thinks it's past his bedtime. I guess it's not because he's still giving me a run for my $ at 9pm.

I am old and I am tired and I cannot tell what is AI and what is not but so help me God if I go looking for a sweet treat that doesn't exist, there will be hell to pay.

🎶 Would love a Chicago Dog, can't stop thinking about a Chicago Dog

Five Guys is closing in my town, it could be that splitting the cost over 4 payments for a burger just isn't the current vibe.

Mouth tape but for meetings.

I'm not crying it's ragweed.

I just text someone to remind me to tell them why I'm mad. This is 41.

Just a carwash with ShepGK.

At this point I think my allergies have allergies.

All of 22's friends brought me candles for mothers day but I was sick so they left them at the door, my front door looked like an alter this morning, I felt dead, so it kind of worked. Day 2 of not rat virus, just summer flu.

Trying to figure out how many jobs I'll need to survive the next pandemic, 9, at least 9.

This girl at work calls me "babe" and another girl was like "why is she babe" the girl said fine and called her babe, the other girl was like why did you say it like that and this girl said Amanda is 💅 babe and you're babe like Ruth. I snorted like I was the Ruth.

Lately I've been telling men they look like they drive a Mazda Miata. I will not elaborate.

I'm wearing a tee shirt that says "It's a bad day to be a hot dog", of course I'd like to hop on a quick video call.

This was always essential. collider.com/prime-video-...

New CVS Provider Line hold music just dropped and it's a bop.

Hot Dog Summer > Hot Girl Summer

Ebay Posts: Vintage! Also, pick your size and color so we can print it off tomorrow.

Me IRL

So we are going to be poor and have no SSRIs?!

Might go stand in the tennis ball sized hail.

If they don't renew RJ Decker I'm can eling streaming (until Dexter releases.)

Hot Dog charging cord for Hot Dog Summer 🌭

If I have ever kept you from hurting yourself or anyone else or looked at a rash for you, you owe me a Mother's Day Gift and a Nurse's Week Gift. Plan accordingly, you have until Sunday.

Add an Uncruustable?!

Happy Nurse's Week, all I got was Pandemic Part 2 Training.

I cna already tell that it's going to be a bad summer to be a hot dog around me.

If you get on a boat, that's on you.

Please know the full tank of gas in my suv is not indicative of my wealth, I simply have no social life.

I will Anna Nicole before I ever work another pandemic.

Maybe if he stopped getting Starbucks, he could afford a ballroom.