@jessicalanyadoo.bsky.social is back answering more listener questions on Part 2 of this AMA episode! Listen wherever you get your podcasts or watch the full episode on YouTube.

In this clip from my recent conversation with David Palumbo-Liu, we talk about the difference between identifying behavior in others and identifying it in ourselves. Listen to the whole episode of Speaking Out of Place wherever you get your podcasts.

Thank you to @zahrastardust.bsky.social for this beautiful review of Love in a F*cked-Up World in @overlandjournal.bsky.social. "Soft and fierce, utopian and practical, inscribed with beauty and strength, Love in a F*cked Up World is both an intervention and a guidebook."

Episode 10 is out! In this episode, I talk to Kelly Hayes, the brilliant journalist and organizer whose writing and podcast so many of us rely on to make sense of the world. Watch on YouTube or listen wherever you get your podcasts.

Join me in Linz, Austria for a mutual aid workshop tomorrow 12-6pm with maiz! Attendance is free and you can register at their website: www.maiz.at/de/bereiche/...

In this clip from Episode 9 of Love in a F*cked Up World, the podcast, the brilliant Weyam Ghadbian talks about whether the prevalence of insecure attachment might stem from the widespread forced displacement generations of people have experience because of colonialism, war, and ecological crisis.

The Berlin Poly Meetup is hosting me for a discussion of Love in a F*cked-Up World on Oct 26. Please join as at 5pm at Lovelite! ❤️

Morgan Bassichis introduced me to the idea that intentionally generating bad ideas for impossible actions, bad poetry, bad writing can loosen the rigid, critical mind that impedes our creativity. Find more content like this and join the conversation on patreon.com/deanspade.

Shuli Branson recently invited me on The Breakup Theory podcast to talk about a listener letter from someone who had a difficult experience with a community accountability process and was left feeling isolated and defeated. You can listen to the whole episode wherever you get podcasts.

Often times, when we’re having heightened feelings in a group or relationship, on some level it feels like life-or-death, even if we logically know its just the dishes or the money or the jealousy or the disagreement in the meeting.

I'll be with @interruptcrim.bsky.social for a conversation about how to advance narratives that undermine authoritarianism and increase solidarity. Join me, @dreanyc123.bsky.social and Lewis Wallen on October 15th, 3pm est! ❤️ ❤️

If you are not in London but want to attend, there is an online/livestream option. Please still register at the link below to get the link! Tickets are free :)

How can you tell when it's time to leave a relationship with a person, project, job, or group? How can you tell if you have a tendency to walk away too fast or to stay too long in relationships?

I'll be presenting some thoughts about work--wage work, housework, care work, organizing work, and all other kinds--at Birkbeck in London on October 10th at 6pm! www.bbk.ac.uk/events/event...

'Sticking Together in Tough Times' with Dean Spade 6 Oct 6-8pm Discussing the kinds of bold, rule-breaking, risk-taking resistance that people are taking up to care for each other and save lives right now. www.ucl.ac.uk/institute-of...

How do you balance love, friendship, and radical organizing? @deanspade.bsky.social's new book shows leftists how to build ethical, supportive relationships without losing sight of the struggle. Read the conversation with @emanabdelhadi.bsky.social: inthesetimes.com/article/love...

I'll be in Manchester on October 3rd at 6:30pm with Wu Tsang at @blackwellsmcr.bsky.social. Thanks to the Centre for the Study of Sexuality and Culture and the Centre for New Writing for co-sponsoring. Tickets: www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/love-in-a-...

Edinburgh!! I’ll be with @lighthousebks.bsky.social at the Great Hall on Wednesday October 1st at 7pm for a discussion on Love in a F*cked-Up World with Wu Tsang and Nat Raha! Come join us ❤️❤️ lighthousebookshop.com/events/love-...

UK book tour at the beginning of October! I’ll be talking about mutual aid, Love in a F*cked-Up World, and how to stick together in increasingly brutal times. Join me ❤️💛💗 Tickets and access info here: www.deanspade.net/2024/11/15/u...

There are over a 1000 copies of Love in a F*cked-Up World available for people inside prisons and jails! Request a book for someone through this link: airtable.com/app87WhX08mp... Prisoners can request a book by writing to: 1977 Books 1468 Woodley Road Montgomery, Alabama 36106

We so frequently shame other people and ourselves, hoping it will lead to change. @prentishemphill.bsky.social breaks down why shame does not produce insight or behavior change. You can listen to the whole interview wherever you get your podcasts, or watch on YouTube.

These are tumultuous times. Racial capitalism is the reason. It’s time to think outside the box. Listen and subscribe to the anti-imperialist video pod @makcapitalism.bsky.social — produced and co-hosted by the honorable @jaybeware.bsky.social. Pay as little as $1 a month for exclusive content.

Just got more of these cute stickers that I've been handing out during my book tour to give out to people who join our podcast's new Patreon! Grateful to the artists who designed these with me--Sophie Lucido Johnson, Chris E Vargas, Calvin Burnap, and EM Frank. www.patreon.com/deanspade

In this episode, I got to talk to my friend and teacher, @prentishemphill.bsky.social. Prentis knows so much about love, organizing, and healing, this conversation was a gift and I have reflected on it many times since we recorded it.

If you’re distressed watching the transphobic nightmare unfold, a great way to support trans people is to become a penpal to an imprisoned trans person. @powerblossoms.bsky.social, @arcgenderjustice.bsky.social, @blackandpinkorg.bsky.social, @massamp1312.bsky.social, @tpride.bsky.social

Dean Spade discusses his radical self-help book, Love in a Fucked Up World, here: www.removepaywall.com/search?url=h... via @deanspade.bsky.social

I loved seeing what Reyanna James favorite ideas from Love in a F*cked Up World are—an honor to be read closely by such an excellent writer. www.radishliving.com/how-to-love-...

Bring your reading group to a live discussion of Love in a F*cked-Up World! Bring all your questions about crushes, friendships, open relationships, robust support systems, conflict, hard feelings. Tickets: www.patreon.com/c/DeanSpade/...

We launched a Patreon last week to raise money for the Love in a F*cked Up World podcast. The Patreon is a place for people who want to go deeper with all the themes in the book and the podcast.

Is sexting sex? In this video I respond to a listener question about whether sexting counts as sex for purposes of agreements about monogamy and nonmonogamy.

3/10: @deanspade.bsky.social in conversation with Wu Tsang for LOVE IN A F*CKED UP WORLD: How To Build Relationships, Hook Up And Raise Hell Together. www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/love-in-a-...

We are starting a Patreon to support the Love in a F*cked Up World podcast, and to create a place where people can go deeper with the ideas in the podcast and the book. New videos, live q & a's, community message boards and more. Join us!

In Episode 6, Morgan Bassichis and I talk about how to navigate communicating electronically a lot, having dates that are like little vacations, playing house during visits, and other dimensions of long distance relationships.

Join TanyaMarck + Nick + @deanspade.bsky.social for this juicy chat about what it means to liberate #love + #beauty + #queer #joy during challenging times. Link in bio OR find us on Apple Podcast, Spotify, YouTube, Amazon/Audible, or your favorite podcast streamer. Yay!

Conversation with @prisonculture.bsky.social about how the "conciergification" of our lives is de-skilling us for organizing with each other. Listen to the whole episode wherever you get your podcasts.

Talking to @prisonculture.bsky.social about her idea that hope is a discipline. How do we practice that discipline? From Ep 5 of my new podcast, which you can listen to here: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/m... Please subscribe and review--it helps others find us.

In Ep 5 I got to talk to @prisonculture.bsky.social about the dangers of putting ppl on pedestals, what to do when you are getting canceled, how to relate to the concept of hope, how norms about sex and romance influence resistance work, and more. Listen wherever you get your podcasts.

Watch the full episode 13-minute where Morgan and I talk about a tool you can use when you are fixated to get some perspective. Available on Youtube as a video, or listen wherever you get your podcasts.

Watch the full episode about how the "What else is true?" exercise can help when you're fixated on a conflict or interaction. Find it on YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts.

This new episode of Love in a F*cked Up World, the podcast, is also available as a video. Watch me and Morgan giggle about our overly serious efforts to transform ourselves and our conditions. www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHy-...

You can preorder from any bookstore. Here's the link to the book: wwnorton.com/books/978132... And shoutout to @deanspade.bsky.social for the idea!

Episode 4 of Love in a F*cked Up World, the podcast is out now! In this tiny 13-minute episode, I talk to Morgan Bassichis about a tool for getting perspective when we are tied up in knots about something.

My interview with Katie Dalebout on her podcast LET IT OUT was released yesterday!

Fireweed Collective just posted the videos from my Valentine's Day Breakup Webinar. Find the video with ASL and the video with Spanish interpretation at the link in my bio, and the previous four webinars on romance, friendship, and sticking together. www.deanspade.net/2023/02/22/v...

Our study group is over, but you can still watch the 5 sessions and read all the materials from the link in my bio. Best done with friends if possible.

From Episode 3 of Love in a F*cked Up World, the podcast, in which I talk with my dear friends Morgan Bassichis and Tourmaljne about a tool for finding nuance when we’re emotionally reactive and thinking in binaries.

Very much looking forward to this conversation with anarchist workers in Berlin in a couple weeks! berlin.fau.org/2025/07/14/3...