Wait, is the only umbrella I own in my car?

Putting on slippers to walk 10 steps to the closet to get your shoes is kind of crazy

I want to learn to love soup again

I need to get a card for my friend, probably some adhesive bandages, too, and maybe some (real) canned soup if I remember

I can't tell if it's dark because it's cloudy and threatening rain or if it's just getting later in the day Probably both

Hmm.. it's thundering, but not raining? This doesn't seem to bode well with Easter being tomorrow and all that

Also, finally getting wireless headphones so I can listen to Critical Role (something I exclusively watch on my computer) and wander the house doing chores (they will also help with cable management)

Anyways, now that I don't really play video games anymore, I feel like a real gamer because I bought a mechanical keyboard (for work, eventually/hopefully) that made me restructure my desk so now my big ass monitor is front and center and I can fully utilize my mousepad for its intended purpose

And by “last night,” I do mean in the past three hours because that’s when I’ve been not-quite-awake-or-asleep enough to a) dream and b) remember it

I dreamed a dream last night

All this “I need someone to match my freak” going around and I’m out here like “I need someone to match my lifestyle, my lived experiences”

Does daylight approach? Yes Am I just now going to bed? Yes Did I get home almost an hour and a half ago? Yes Did I do anything productive between then and now? Kind of, yes Did I do anything productive in the household? No, absolutely not

The knees are.. bad

SUCH HEAVY LOVE

Reading the news in a drive-thru line because it’s the only place open this late

Hey what if the problem just.. solves itself?

“Oh, I’ll get food after dancing; I don’t have (read: didn’t give myself) time for it before” *Gets hungry as soon as the second lesson starts*

Wait.. I think I have one more load of laundry in the dryer.. and I should probably eat, too UGH

This is what I get for sleeping until noon(ish)

It feels like the day just started, too

I think I need to go and get ready to go dancing..

One of the potentially problematic things that I do in my head is that I hear people say less instead of fewer and my little rat brain just steps in and says "fewer" as a correction in my head

I need to steal a cookie tin.. or just buy some cookies in a tin Either way, I need a place to put my sewing shit; it's starting to become too many things to just have out and about on my desk

We love not playing any video games for so long that you try to launch a game and Steam itself has to update

Ugh, travel day

Look, all I’m saying is that if your boots come off easily, they’re not snug enough There are no laces, you have to have snug boots or else you’ll get blisters because the boot will be rubbing everything

*Fool of a man complains about getting blisters etc. from his new boots* Me, internally: Are we sure the boots fit?

I forgot that fresh leather soles have functionally negative traction on carpet

(I don’t care specifically about using company money to pay [too much money] for gasoline)

I don’t care, y’all voted for the bastard

Technically, we were asked to not purchase fuel from a specific station “as you’re paying 4.00 per gallon” However, comma, I am (the company is) paying $3.999 at a totally different gas station a week later

Have we been specifically instructed to not pay $4 per gallon for gas in the work trucks- wait, actually, let me read that email again

I hope people noticed the play on words with the floss thread

And now we wait (try and fall asleep)

A (floss) thread on dentistry and flossing because my Neurodivergent ass had a conversation about it earlier and can’t stop thinking about it:

I learned I have Friday off, which means tomorrow is local apparent Friday, which means I am absolutely closing out the Gay Dance Hall

Hey, does anyone live in the Tampa/St. Petersburg, Florida area Asking for a friend

The shirts were a gift from our parents, so it makes sense that we even have matching shirts

MY SISTER AND I ARE WEARING THE SAME SHIRT AAHHH!!! (This is good)

Having a Family Meeting over Zoom because apparently not a single member of my immediate family (only unexpected pair is my parents) is in the same household at the moment

My friend: *Sends me a Partiful invite for their birthday party with "Time and Location TBD"* Me: Absolutely, I will be there

“Bro, you’re so chopped” “Wait- that’s an insult- oh, like the hit FoodNetwork TV show, where you get- I get it now” “What, no”

Um, actually, I refuse to deep dive anything in which my friends show interest, not because I don’t want to know but because I want them to be able to info-dump about the thing and I know that I would have no self control if I also did a deep dive

I’ve just been introduced to the McGangbang, which is where you put a Hot & Spicy Chicken Sandwich between the patties of a McDouble..

*Sees a part of the ground where the dirt dried up and cracked into little plates* Let me tell you something about a place called the Shattered Plains

*Goes to send my friend a photo of my new duvet/duvet cover* *Realizes I took a bajillion photos of my coworker slaying in front of some poison ivy (they’re.. immune?)*

I imagine, in times like this, @bagmilk.swifties.social watching the timeline with a rolled up newspaper just waiting for me to post so they can beat me over the head with it

Exactly, in this, the year of [J-name]

Apparently I die because “[my] music taste is awful. Somewhere, sometime down the line, someone has enough.” To which my only response is nuh uh, it’ll be because I ragebait my coworker who used to tour with Richie Ramone

Starting a new thing, and it may be a little late for some of y’all, but you can always catch it next week It’s called “Text-an-Ex Tuesday” So here’s the premise- *gets grabbed by the throat by their friend like Homer grabs Bart*