This transition altered my brain chemistry when I was 17 and made me gay

Need to buy more slutty bike shorts so I can realize they look awful on me and I can never wear them again

New BG3 run is just 3 twinks and their girl frog

I love how even in a liberal’s wildest dreams they still want to share a little power with the fascists lmao

They just created a million Patton Oswalts

I’m sorry Trump giving Clinton the gluck gluck is too much like we’re jumping the shark here

Will we get a part 2 to the famous Die Young AMV

god I am fucking cooking what a dream

Yep, there it is lol

Being a Kojima simp means never going hungry

I think the only shocking development about these emails is how Epstein was borderline illiterate

Right now, Karoline Leavitt is being coached on how to say “ephebophilia” in the least creepy way possible.

Chat, is this it? (🤡)

My only takeaway is that there exist people who wait for, purchase, and play Gran Turismo games

This State of Play may be my last hope

Nvm he cooked here tbh

I’m finishing this garbage only because it’s doing wonders for my imposter syndrome lol

writing: editing:

The cold is such bullshit in Florida because everything revolves around having your tits out and you don’t even get snow

and fuck kim davis’ ugly ass

Hit a new PR on bench and added a new line to the routine 🤩

Calorically speaking what happened today can never happen again 😭

Oh right, that’s why I don’t drink liquor

ADTR they could never make me hate you no matter how ass you become

Please stop falling for the MTG is a new person con. Please.

Rest now sister. We have the kente. I'll see you in Wakanda.

Fellas, if your girl: -bed rots all day -heals herself by hurting you -carries a giant sword -has a nearly uncounterable spinning leap attack Then that’s not your girl. That’s Malenia, Blade of Miquella.

Obsessed with Mormon IG all they do is beg Christians to let them in the club

“Claim your FREE Crunchwrap supreme?”

Three sheets of paper taped to the wall in steakhouse menu font

Is anybody surprised Nikki is MAGA? She’s married to a pedophile lol

Mamdani: “We won because we insisted that no longer would politics be something that is done to us. Now, it is something that we do.”

Woke 2.0 is coming for its enemies.

How it feels to come back to work after bouncing on it on lunch break

It’s hard to find a suitable alternative to Spotify man these apps got me listening to Florence and the Device

Whoever said they were saving that bottle of champagne for Dick Cheney, have fun and be safe tonight 🫶🏼

Kingdom Hearts (2002)

This meeting could have been a gentle embrace

Finally painted my dnd mini. I think he’s neat!

Waited way too long to get into Invincible but now I get to binge it so we stay winning in the end

3 sets of wasting time in my mirror ✍️

we were supposed to leave an HOUR AGO

😭😭😭

Good enough lmao

Okay so I actually do have one straight guy friend but the only time we ever talk is on 9/11

Him: you better not be a cunty yet unnecessary logo update when I get home Me:

“Stop drinking Diet Coke!! It was tested on rats and they all DIED!!” What they did to the rats in that experiment: