Just gonna hang out with this freak instead of going to work today

Call her 'Bury Weiss' the way she buried that story

I haven't been on an airplane in like 12 years and now I'm going to Florida, god's pisshole.

hit me with your book recommendations and i'll see if they're at the library tomorrow

It's that time of the year again

*Not really getting it, but wanting to feel included*: "uh, yeah, my pronouns are I/me"

what are some other good movies to falsely remember Sinbad starring in

i wonder when they'll start announcing horny games on the game awards

did anything interesting happen at the game awards or did i make the right choice in not watching and doing something else

Annihilation

do not let santa into your home without a warrant

Santa Claus is a symbol of the encroaching police state

AI can't make art because the computer is not tormented by neither eros nor thanatos

who is the worse video games writer, ken levine or neil druckmann

jelqer's trick

its a bad essay even if you excuse the offensive statements for some reason

working on a formulation for carbonated salad dressing

genAI tech seems like its in the back third of a ponzi scheme

Give me admin privileges on your discord server

easy trick to talking with a new zealand accent: just say everything with one single vowel sound

you'll feel better after you take a shit

thank god there was shit in the epstein emails that we can make jokes about

Goon. Die. Repeat.

i think its really funny when someone calls it "porno"

for more great observations and witticisms, follow me on bisky dot org

if the blue jays win the world series they should bring back the expos

so what did jesus do with his gold, anyways

If I run for office I pledge to publish my full nude body to prove I don't have any nazi tattoos

Ghost story idea: a 3d printer that prints bones, like real ones, from a human, also they're kind of slimy

These 'raw milk' yokels make me wanna start pasteurizing all my beverages at home. Water, iced tea, Dr. Pepper, urine, apple juice, energy drinks, frozen margaritas and even coffee. You can never be too careful.

whats the elon musk dickrider population like these days?

It turns out the muppets were a terrible influence on our society, because pigs will see a frog and instinctually move to abuse it

Don't tell me what days I'm allowed to post stuff

In these trying times, we often need to hear words to give us the power to continue on, and I believe it would benefit us all to remember the following words of strength and conviction: The S-blade has a hackblood charge.

quick while the government is shut down let’s all switch to metric

well now i know why my bid to purchase electronic arts was rejected

how long until game devs start mimicking the AI style in order to make fun of it

They're going to eliminate autism and then act surprised when nothing works in a few generations

Help Im getting raptored

happy equinox btw *casts a peace and tranquility spell upon you*

a dad who is driving his family down the interstate at 80 mph when suddenly he's the only one to get raptured

not to be all 'you reap what you sow' about it but damn can't really feel bad about a dude killed by the machine he spent his life championing

Don't forget this promise from April. I'm sure it won't be the dumbass answer we're all expecting. share.google/x0XiZULfPip0...

you can tell the Dungeon Crawler Carl series is 'woke' because there are no british characters in it

We can no longer say "a grand jury would indict a ham sandwich"

if someone is writing a biography about you and you're still alive then you're a real mess. ordinarily, someone would wait until you're definitely done doing stuff before bothering to write it all down, and if they give that up that means people need to figure your shit out right now.

visiting the Regional Museum of Aura Farming

My publicist has advised me NOT to say "Yes! I AM Cuomophobic" publically and that I should destroy 30,000 t-shirts that have already been printed