Me on the Australian Today Show: jasonklamm.com/today-extra-...

And for the record, yes, the laugh will be a slow burn, so you horny little freaks won't be getting it until at LEAST season 2.

I just had the dumbest idea ever. I'm putting it out there because I think I deserve this. I want to play the Cryptkeeper in a prequel series. Pretty sure that asshole was a Vaudevillian who moonlighted in death. People come by the cemetery and he tells jokes and stories as they're trying to mourn.

As an update, this is also going in #FerrisBuellerYoureMyHero

If you live in Australia and saw me on Australia's Today Extra, say hi! Also, I'd love to see how insane I looked. Also, was that 90 seconds or five minutes? #livetv #ferrisbuelleryouremyhero #ferrisbuellersdayoff #writing #author #nonfiction

Someone is driving 200 MPH down the freeway daily and killing people in the process. Do you: A: Put up more guardrails so they can keep killing people B: Yell sternly from the other side of the freeway C: Throw down a spike strip If you're in the A or B group, you're part of the problem.

Take action now and sign onto @everylibrary.bsky.social's petition here: action.everylibrary.org/hr_7661

In other news, Armie Hammer's nom de plume is "Sandee LaMotte."

Is there anything sadder than a beyond-grown-ass man calling his podcast "Club Rand*m?" I'm aware he's also a giant piece of shit, but come on, that's like me calling my podcast "6-7 Skibidi Dab House."

Sorry Bruce, but the Bat Cave is more like-

It's not often you get press while in the middle of research, but I got to go to last year's Detroit Auto Show and sat in a screen-used "Ferrari" from #FerrisBuellersDayOff. www.detroitnews.com/picture-gall...

Dateline: 1945. Franklin Delano Roosevelt absolutely trounces the Axis powers when he tells the papers, "Hitler? More like Shitler." The war was won and FDR didn't die till he was 99, going on to be known as "The Man Who Stopped Hitler with a Sick-ass Dunk." "Tell me I'm a memelord."

Thanks to Entertainment Weekly for covering #ferrisbuelleryouremyhero again! ew.com/who-was-the-...

Good going library. Good lookin' out. #library

News used to be better

If you missed me on @wgnradio.bsky.social with Wendy Snyder over the weekend, here's a link to the episode. My segment starts at 54:00. wgnradio.com/sunday-morni... #ferrisbuellersdayoff #author #writing #chicago #nonfiction #ferrisbueller

I'm on @wgnradio.bsky.social right now talking about #ferrisbuelleryouremyhero. Give it a listen! #ferrisbuellersdayoff #writing #nonfiction #comedy #radio Listen here: player.amperwave.net/3614

I know it can only be 11 people at a time, but I kinda wanna do an author event on Animal Crossing. I also have an amazing Little Free Library in my neighborhood that I've wanted to do an author event at since I first saw it. #author #booktour #ferrisbuellersdayoff

Cheers to @people.com 🕶️ people.com/jon-cryer-al... @jasonklamm.com

Jon Cryer was so much fun to speak with and we also talked way too long about "Thank you Andre, I'll have the veal piccata."

Quick, someone get Mad TV back on the air so I can pitch Blanka Patch.

Will is the best!

A little sclusie from Entertainment Weekly. Kind of unreal. ew.com/new-book-rev... #ferrisbuellersdayoff #ferrisbuelleryouremyhero #writing #author

New whomst just dropped.

My one-man show will start with me looking up from my menial pretend task and yelling, "Oh fuck! How'd you get in here?!" and I'll spend an hour trying to convince the audience to leave.

I had a great time chatting with Jeff Milo on the @ferndalelibrary.bsky.social podcast about #ferrisbuelleryouremyhero and quite a bit about my last book, too. He asked some of the best questions I've ever been asked, he's a culture lover, and it was a good conversation, too. djch.xyz/jkferndalepod

Here's a thing again. I need to get myself a camera that isn't my phone or as heavy as my Canon.

POV: You're Jerry Lewis and you can't remember the title to Spielberg's "The Fabelmans."

Hey, look at that! Publisher's Weekly likes "Ferris Bueller...You're My Hero." Fun! You can pre-order anywhere books are sold. Info at comedybooks.net. #ferrisbueller #nonfiction #author #writing

djch.xyz/covatdpl A little piece on donating my vinyl comedy collection to the Detroit Public Library. #comedyonvinyl #dpl #comedy #records

They each have a face that says "my cum tastes of ozone and I'm okay with that."

T-minus how many days till Elon announces he's hired a team of scientists to invent a camel-shrinking ray?

"Hi. I'm admitting that I don't experience the one thing that supposedly separates humans from animals. It should be no surprise that I'm a billionaire."

Everyone do me a favor and support this MST3K Lego Ideas pitch by clicking the thumbs up! Let's get it made! beta.ideas.lego.com/product-idea...

Trying to get a dedicated camera for my author tour this spring and summer. Looking for additional sponsors, but I also have this list. #author #booktour #ferrisbuellersdayoff #ferrisbuelleryouremyhero You can also go to Comedybooks.net to pre-order "Ferris Bueller: You're My Hero."

There's a non-zero chance Softhead McGoo saw a memo and thought it said "TRANS DEVELOPING NUKES" and was like "oh the twitter boys are gonna love this."

Accepting my pansexuality helped cowabungize me, giving me a new perspective on the patriarchy and my role in it. I need to see this sort of thing on CNN toot sweet.

Gonna start saying "cowabungized" because radicalized is too loaded.

I only recently realized what "C Suite" means because why would that ever come up and it's funny/sad every time I realize that these people absolutely *love* being properly labeled and filed away like that because it gives them a perceived purpose and meaning. You sound like a software bundle, dude.

We asked people around the world to rate the morality and ethics of others in their country. The U.S. is the only place we surveyed where more adults describe the morality and ethics of others living in the country as bad than good. See our full morality report here: www.pewresearch.org/...

Importantly... Did you know they seal cans of worms with cork?

It’s opening night of AND THEN THERE WERE NONE at @lyricartsanoka.bsky.social That’s me as Dr. Armstrong below! Watch our trailer on YouTube and join us for the original thriller murder-mystery from Agatha Christie! 🎭👏🖤 Grateful to be back at LA with this talented cast & crew. #MNTheatre

Here is something dumb I made to celebrate. www.redbubble.com/shop/ap/1780... #ferrisbuelleryouremyhero #fontjoke #ferrisbueller #book #writing #author

Here is something dumb I made to celebrate. www.redbubble.com/shop/ap/1780...

Probably unrelated. encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/a...

This is... a little late. @pulmyears.bsky.social was a generous, funny, and kind guest on @danandjay.com and I should have released this episode LITERAL MONTHS AGO. My sincerest apologies to Paul, who wrote the brilliant "John Candy: A Life in Comedy." He was a damned delight to have on the show.

The Cameron Frye quote from #ferrisbuellersdayoff that I carry with me. On my glasses. My purple glasses. djch.xyz/ferris to pre-order 'Ferris Bueller...You're My Hero.'

Thanks to IndieWire for running this excerpt! #ferrisbuelleryouremyhero #ferrisbueller #johnhughes #movies #books #author #writing