Still wanna beat up whoever my brother says he's paying.

I felt like I was reading a poet who wanted to be a writer. He then wrote about his time in slam poetry and how much it still called to him. Something about that allowed my brain to receive his writing style with less resistant.

Between The World and Me was an interesting read. I felt guilty because honestly, I disliked most of my read of it. Right until the exact middle where he confirmed what my issue was.

See also; people too *busy* or with no interest in reading. You 40. Fuck you mean.

I've also developed a red flag around people that say the gym is their hobby, while having no other consistent hobbies. You are neither meeting, greeting, or working on that internal self.

Being in therapy, while asking them to go to therapy, and being told the gym is their therapy is like....ok cool cool cool. Talking to that lady is nothing like a Smith machine.

Few things have helped me course correct like understanding my relationship to dopamine.

So as I reach my limit of talking to humans again, I recognize how thankful I am to be equipped for the experiences life allows me to travel through. I updated my 2026 goals and have an idea of the man I want to grow into during this. Aight my babies I'm back to shutting up.

Threw my best friend a successful bachelors trip. Officiated a wedding. And as of my January checkup, no longer considered pre-diabetic (technically, came in at 5.9/6 😅)

Started salsa. Bachata. Jit. Finished 4 books (The Long Walk = best book w/ absolute worst ending.) Ran a 5k. Broke 13 minute miles (11:15-30 average.) Fell *DEEPLY* in love with my friends. Competed in competitive pokemon events. Got my Au/D diagnosis. Found 3in of dick I had stored away. 2025 man.

I spent so much time focusing on building healthy habits over last year it took until December to realize how bad the year was in key areas. Grief hit hard, randomly. Learning how to welcome the feelings and navigate them wasn't something I expected to do well. But I did.

I've got one remaining hurdle to clear and then this is a chapter that can be closed. Ashe. Amen. All that.

Objectively, 25 was one of the worst years I've gone through. But all considered, so many formative things happened I feel on the better side of a bad equation. My affirmation has been "I am thankful for *now*" and it's been a great centering tool.

The grandmother I've been focused on honoring on my altar has made clear requests for Pepsi and tobacco. The day I put Pepsi out for her, she brought clarity to a situation that evening.

January had some nasty hurdles that I still had to face as included in 2025 business. It went about as bad as expected, in a better way than I imagined though. Those required shutting up, and not making my problems a shared issue.

If I hadn't spent time in therapy, I would consider 2025 a year of massive loss. I'm thankful that I've been able to reframe it as a year of release. 2025 reconfigured me.

In the practice of keeping an ancestral altar, downloads have become so much clearer. 2025 did things to me that required stillness as the year closed. They told me to shut up, so I did.

@thegatesofmel.blacksky.app happiest of birthdays to you my baby 💕

Went to CVS to get meds and randomly got my CV19 and Flu booster. In the same arm. On a weekend I'm double dad duty. Before hosting DnD/TCG night from 6-11. Lol.

Married people be saying single things on here.

My turn to host TCG & D&D night tonight for the crew. Now to let the spirit of my mother guide this soap, bleach and hot water.

I TOTALLY wasn't gonna vote for the rapist, racist, felon until I found out a WOMAN was running and I said you know HWAT buddy....

At the hoochie Daddy party a woman said I looked like I lotion before I get dressed and I see exactly why that's something women notice.

It's crazy how exceptional their incompetent is.

They got rid of DEI policies just to show people of color how much worse at any job they can be than us.

eeeeYUCK. (Also, on brand for his "humankind" stance)

So he need to go home and learn to be a dad too. Crazy.

Aragorn I'll beat yo ass bro what?? 😭

All cuz one man decided to turn aim assist off for the day

Also. If they're serious about their donations they would do it without tax write offs.

It's 12:12. What the hell.

Bring Her Back is also another horror watch that was a bit unsettling. HBO i think.

It's also kinda legitimately scary. I watch a lot of thriller/horror and this really gets some stuff right very right. Admittedly, IT is the first book that *actually* scared me during the read.

One more chapter in Lord of The Rings then I'm done reading the series 🥺

415 sun looking like 745. Ew.

Giving me the finger and then running means you need a wet willy at 35 wit yo weak ass.

Guy randomly pulls in front of me getting to a red light, no blinker + DANGEROUSLY late. I honk. He pulls into the lane and just...sits. I honk again. He gives me the finger, which is cool. I go to pull up on him and he damn near SWINGS his car outta control from a ditch just to not be next to me😭

Man LMAO. How you got road rage but also soft??? Pick one 😭

Imagine having a 3sum and you make her BF pack his dick up and have a cry in the bathroom. Someone remind me at 4am to tell this story.

This is funny but actually.....

Are you a mechanic because you've changed your oil? Or can you just....do the thing without needing to be titled?

Like yes big bad scary polyam people but also the default?? Like we...can...see...y'all? MonoAm ills and woes are not any more admirable, my babies.

Polyam scorn doesn't raise the needle anymore because 90% of what we experience from *any* intimate horror story is based most likely rooted in monoamory.

If you meet someone and start dating and they tryna parent trap you RUN!!! They behind on CHISUP and need your account info.

The way my BM would EVISCERATE me for having a woman im dating have PARENTING EQUITY with OUR child???????? Courtney from Puritan???? Bitch LMAO

Is that a white? That's gotta be a white. Cuz ain't no way in my BLACK ASS life or family 😭😭😭

I am an adult in an intimate relationship with their parent. I am an adult who can extend thoughtfulness, kindness, and respect to a child. I am not that childs parent until that child and parent have that conversation with me where we communicate what that change in relationship looks like. Tf?

??? No, I am not. Someone I am dating has no obligation to my child outside of respect or kindness. I do not live with partners, blend finances, or require my partners to contribute to any rearing of my kid. ? What?

I don't need to parent anyone's kids but my own 1.5, and they already kicking my ass. I don't have no mo ass to kick.

I have a kid, so no. IME, I don't need parenting to overlap AT ALL during dating. Im always kind to children but I have zero bearing on your parenting.