this is musty. put it back.

"an album for cop wives" has me short-circuiting 💀💀

if you sneeze in these seats you can hear God say "bless you"

if you think i'm watching Rams-Niners OT???? your drugs are locked IN.

Bey reentering her titty era is gonna heal a lot of people.

i think the Great Replacement theory is long overdue and should in fact be accelerated in every way possible.

what if we get to heaven and the decor is ugly??? can i paint some shit if i put down a deposit??

now if i speak.....

right message, WRONG example because Ticketmaster could charge me both kidneys for a Beyoncé concert and i'ma just have to die in that fifth row, idk idk idk.

rest, queen. and Nymphia Wind, when I fucking catch you....

my heroes have all fallen. this is the worst year in recorded history.

wayyyyy too many people getting baptized by white men rn. gotta be a recession indicator.

my team is no longer on psychedelics. what a relief it is.

*enter Zac Robinson standing over the kitchen sink crying into a backwood because he knew rent was due today meme here*

that drive was kinda giving belt to ass, idk idk idk

we need to name a Waffle House plate after Xavier Watts *immediately*

Pitts redzone touchdown????? everybody need to play the lottery today.

if i am your sky crush you might wanna sit down for this one....

we really do not say "pussass hoe" enough as a community anymore. when did we lose our fabric????

hell yeah. that's a vocal, Maury. it didn't win that Oscar for nothing.

me, to the plastic bag when the Indian delivery arrives:

BITCH I SAID:

i need dinner inspo. hit me with your best shot.

living long enough to watch the presumed next-up dynasty franchise turn into ass soufflé???? literally nothing is more satisfying. my nipples are diamonds rn.

me & my homies, not giving a fuck:

me, haunting Raheem Morris in his dreams:

now where all these Iggles fans come from?????

watching ppl talk shit about my friend all weekend has been a very difficult exercise in restraint. because a least seven of y’all have almost gotten crashed tf out on just because.

LMAOOO. shut out *and* blown out, ending it with abother turnover. the Falcons and the Saints both need to be ejected into open space.

Kirk throwing like he’s in a church parking lot

Zac AND Raheem need to be held up by their ankles until the change falls out of their pockets.

Desmond Ridder with two black parents needs to snap tf out of it. im not doing this all season without a healthy dose of self-harm to take the edge off.

about to extract all of my teeth & put them in a coffee grinder. brb.

been a while since I’ve seen a game this well roundedly bad. honestly didn’t know we still had it in us.

HORRIBLE team. horrible coaching. horrible culture. i can’t wait to spit at their feet next Sunday.

time to update some resumes in Flowery Branch

LMAOO im screaming. I hate this team.

offense playing like they just met each other during the national anthem. pls end my life.

that slide pissed me tfo

this game is grotesque. i might start howling at halftime just to feel something.

tell Koo we were just playing. make him a pot roast if you have to!

my football team is on CRACK????????

one was for the bourbon babes, the other was for the cocaine chicas. we love an effective multipurpose event, free Deena and Curtis i am SORRY.

me, playing Thugga and Nudy back to back after wiping the crust from my eyes:

i have no idea what Shaky Feet is, but pleaseeeeeee get these pink toes out of my city! why are they at all the ✊🏿 spots????? even the afterhours????

our society started fraying at the edges as soon as they took Fruitopia out of the schools. i’m ready to provide an entire thesis if necessary.