We're all gonna go back to working from home but not because of a virus this time. This time we will all work from home because no one will have the gas to get to work.

Alright pack it up, this one wins

Well I guess it's a good thing that this man Hassett hasn't been put in charge of the economy at the highest levels of government.

This only happened because he have refused to admit that graphics peaked with the never released Xbox one game Scalebound.

You're an idiot and you should feel bad about it

You typed this with your IP exposed and everything?

Damn I wonder what would make him say this? 🤔

"Everything didn't get better when Biden left office so it can't be his fault" is one of the most jingling keys takes I've witnessed in a long time.

I did NOT accept a bribe. The money fell off a truck and landed in my bank account fair and square

So last Friday was my 36th birthday and it was Friday the 13th. And I had expected at the start of this year to spend it with my family... 🧵

They make medicine for this my guy. It's called Haloperidol. Please ask your doctor about it.

If we just rename the Strait to "The Gay of Hormuz" we could have this whole mess wrapped up in like 3 margaritas

If you showed this to someone who spent the last 30 years in a bunker without internet they would assume this is a highly advanced cybernetic android. A being that's made to appear human, but has a difficult time pulling off the nuance of authentic life, because it's just cold hard machine inside.

I pointed out that some dork was posting AI generated titties and he was like "nuh uh look they're real!" And posted a picture of the same face with a completely different pair of tits and I was like "those are different areolas and nipples" and he blocked me. I hope he didn't send them any money 😅

Wow they're just completely mask off about it now huh

"If Democrats are so smart how come they lose so god damn always?"

When I don't know how to spell something I always blame the people that taught me. They should have tried harder, obviously it didn't work I'm still stupid you idiots

Hey I noticed you haven't denounced Emperor Palpatine's use of the Death Star to obliterate the sovereign planet of Alderaan, I can only assume this means you support the evil galactic empire and weapons of planetary annihilation.

1996: Mommy picks me up and tussles my hair and calls me the bestest boy 2026: Mommy no longer does this and I am sad Mommy has become villain

Can I get a hell yeah for Stone Cold Steve Austin day from all who celebrate

Sinners won some Oscars, but not ALL the Oscars. Here's why that's bad for them

I love this because by that logic 90% of The Avengers are Rabid zionists, except of course The Hulk.

I see this is going very well for you

If this Caroline bitch reposts me ONE MORE FUCKIN TIME

Your reading comprehension is so bad that YOU look like the bot in this scenario.

When did your obsession with hot toxic women begin?

There's a medicine called VYNDAMAX to treat something called ATTR-CM and apparently has "no known side effects" and I'm having the hardest time convincing myself that this isn't a simulation.

Logging on

The uncontacted tribes in the Amazon are accepting missionaries, should they not kill you and roast your flesh.

That's ok that you don't know how to define fascism because the rest of us still do. I'm sure the list of words you can't define is longer than the list of times you've showered this year.

Quick! What kinda scientist would be?

"People of Iran rise up against your government, take over your institutions and gather in large groups under open air so that we may kill you more cost effectively"

Not true but cool fantasy land you live in bro

I got a question for you fuckin nerds. Assuming he has unlimited prep time, How many batarangs can Batman fit in his ass?

love💖

Really feeling this one today "Hope you're somewhere with your brother" 🫂 Share your favorite MF DOOM/VIKTOR VAUGHN/MADVILLAIN track in the comments

I love when obviously ai generated comments get cut off for character limit.

Yeah that's what happened. 🙄 It's not that conservative groups faked polls that made her look way more popular than she actually was. It's not that she was bamboozled into giving up her house seat by a bunch of virgins on 4chan. Proof that everything can be a conspiracy if you don't know anything.

Never ask a woman her weight. Never ask a man his salary. Never ask a bombmaker why he is running, just try to catch up.

88% issue is a lil on the nose don't you think?

Trouble in the Suez...

Peter/President A man can only memorize so many p-words.

I'm completely ok with my posts getting 1-5 likes because I know with absolute certainty that THIS will never happen to me.

Who's job is it to stop you from posting dumb shit on the internet?

Ah yes very cool

You're just typing words with no real goal at this point. No more intelligent than the average LLM. I pity anyone who ever interacted with you.

It's so cool watching old movies long after they came out. Cuz like people had to wait a whole 2 years between Patriot Games and Clear And Present Danger to find out that Sally Ryan got a baby brother and I got to find out in 12 minutes

If someone lets their child die from a preventable disease due to their own hubris, it is morally correct– nay morally IMPERATIVE that you yell at them about being a terrible person. Sorry you lack the conviction to stand on the right side of history.

Every single reply you have in this thread gets a ratio. I'm starting to think you also lack consciousness, or at least basic self awareness.