So who wants to carpool to Austin 👉🏻👈🏻

Oh my god??

Now why did 28 years later make me cry 😭 goddamn zombie movie got me in my feelings

🎂 It's #ScienceSocks 6th anniversary! 🥳 Celebrate with me by raising money for #STEM! 🤑 For the next 48h I will donate: * 20% of sales on sciencesocks.co#ScienceSocks👈 * $1 per repost Get a head start on #holiday shopping 😎 Please like, repost and let's party🕺💃 🔭🐡🧪🎨#bsnm

happy 1 year 🥳

This is Carl. He was just woken up from a nap. Hopes for your sake the house is on fire. 12/10 (IG: grumpus.steve.carl)

God bless my new job for having Fridays off

Dick Cheney dies, Zohran Mamdani wins, a beaver moon shines in the sky… I just know the Etsy witches have been busy.

Night one of attempting to readjust my sleep schedule to night shift hours

Hey y’all I finally got a new job 🎉 it’s been.. a while since I worked nights so if anyone has a sure fire way to stay awake until I adjust 💀

Me: why is my acid reflux so bad Also me: has eaten spicy chicken nuggets for dinner every day for the past week

Happy Birthday Claire Elizabeth Beauchamp Fraser 🤎 The Queen of Outlander. The best female character ever 👑

Every time I walk to the park and forget my turtle snacks I feel like such a disgrace

(snorting a line of love and appreciation for my friends) oh fuck now that's the good shit

Going to be crying over baby Claire for the next 3-5 business days

this was just *chefs kiss*

😂

Great now I have to actually do my job today

Wake up babe new seaside just dropped!!

What are the chances my new grey hairs will revert back to normal once I leave the stress of this job 💀

Just a little reminder 🩷🩷

I feel like maybe today isn’t the day we should be playing party in the usa on the radio but that’s just me 💀

Who wants to chip in on another etsy witch with me

My grandfather used to say: “Wasps get mean in autumn because they know their time is nearly done.” Certain people are like that, too…

Keep in mind that....

It’s finally gorgeous open the window weather (87° instead of 97°)

We are living in a dystopian hellscape.. I finally got an interview and it’s not even with a person it’s an AI bot 🫩

@jenniferrose.bsky.social happy birthday 🥳

Damn pick a season already we can’t keep going back and forth

Is this even legal for a job application…

I absolutely need this bumper sticker but not where I live 💀

This Cave of Giant Crystals (selenite) is located 980ft underground in Naica, Mexico.

Wish I could do the same

A bald eagle going into defense mode when she spots a predator circling her nest.

People (me) who frequently buy international snacks are suffering rn 🥲 the orange fuck is ruining everything

Apparently learning about the Civil Rights movement is "inappropriate." www.upworthy.com/parents-comp...

Grocery total went from $173 to $54 with my coupons. Feeling like I won the lottery rn 😎

Ate an entire milka bar in one sitting and kind of regretting life rn

this guy has just. not stopped trying to get my number. and now he’s throwing a fit about it.

Haven’t eaten today, didn’t sleep, blood pressure 160/90 were doing great gang

[writing the constitution] Benjamin Franklin: Write down "no dumb fucks as president" Alexander Hamilton: Stop saying that Benjamin Franklin: I'm tellin' you. You're gonna regret not writing that down

Finding out my dad got drunk and is being charged with murder wasn’t on my bingo card for today but here we are 🤪 I really couldn’t just have normal parents could I

My banana tree had a baby 🌴

read him for FILTH🫰🏽

Haven’t watched the episode yet because i value my sleep too much but judging by the reactions i should skip the last few minutes…

Bought a watermelon from some guy on the side of the road and I just know it’s about to be the best watermelon I’ve ever had