Fox News would do an hour long feature on this bot generated headline

the only difference between milk and cheese is that you’ll never hear someone say “oh yeah cheese me daddy”

a few weeks ago tiff says. why tf he look like an infant. too babby.

it is friday once again yall, thank you for being here (esp if yr an undead solidarity acct 🫡 ) valeska suratt, from minneapolis. it wouldn’t surprise me if i’d posted this before but don’t care, didn’t ask + i can’t check + it’s a ripper + L + screamo

Flashback Friday to this 4 song banger I made with Vanessa (La Luna) and Tom (Hundreds of AU, Saetia etc). This would end up being the first part of what I consider a trilogy of projects each with a different incredible vocalist middlemanrecords.bandcamp.com/album/never-...

smoking the shit that made simon garfunkel

[solidarity w our banned girlies!] it is friday once again yall, thank you for being here (esp if yr an undead solidarity acct 🫡 ) valeska suratt, from minneapolis. it wouldn’t surprise me if i’d posted this before but don’t care, didn’t ask + i can’t check + it’s a ripper + L + screamo

it is friday once again yall, thank you for being here (esp if yr an undead solidarity acct 🫡 ) valeska suratt, from minneapolis. it wouldn’t surprise me if i’d posted this before but don’t care, didn’t ask + i can’t check + it’s a ripper + L + screamo

🗣️ this shit is bazinga b 👏 a 👏 z 👏 i 👏 n 👏 g 👏 a 👏

there should be screamo cock in ME

okay yeah i need mental help

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let solid snake put his liquid in me

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let steve carell hit why tf he suddenly lookin so fine in his old age what’s going on with me

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let liu kang watch

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let baraka hit

i’m not ashamed to say i only found out like a year ago that they’re saying “toasty!” in mortal kombat thought them bitches were sayin whoopsie

i wouldn’t be ashamed to say “yeaaaaah i was looking at filth on company time again and i clicked like from my business account, whoopsie”

i’m not ashamed to say i’ve done a Real Big Screamo once or twice in my life

i’m not ashamed to say joseph gordon-levitt in Brick (2005) can frickin get it

i’m not ashamed to say meowwwwww

i’m not ashamed to say i have a perky set of bazingas

i’m not ashamed to say i can fit a carton of almond milk in my ass and crush it like a beer can

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let gwyndolin show me that reversal ring

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let philip jay my fry

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let zoidberg hit

i’m not ashamed to say that i’d let cthulhu hit

i’m not ashamed to say i can rewind a cassette with my wiengler

i’m not ashamed to say my wiener fits through the little hole in a vinyl record

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let bruce my willis

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let jeff go jurassic in my park

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let a dwarf gimli a good time

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let sauron put a ring on it

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let elijah give me wood

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let willard stiles hit

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let jenova hit

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let father gascoigne hit

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let the iron giant hit

i’m not ashamed to say i’d let bill nye hit

remember when jk rowling was liking fully illegal porn on his official account

*some bullshit no one cares about* edit: thanks for hole, kind stranger! edit2: electric boogaloo: wow, 100 updoots!

it’s screamo’clock somewhere

imagine finding out that dude liked your p*rn though and then finding out he s*spended and b*nned a buncha twannies cause he can’t contend with his internal shame

sometimes i’ll have tiff read back to me all of my posts of the day like a bedtime story so let’s just say they’ve burnt my bookshelf the library of asterandria, if you will

rmbr whn 4rr0n r0d3r1ck5 w4s lk1ng b4rly lg41 p0rn frm h1s 0ff1c14l 4cc0unt?

Yer remember when Arry Rodgericks be likin' naught but booty from his official hook, and that booty be the risqué kind, savvy?

uwu ♡ wemember when bwuesky head of twust and safety -.- a-aawon wodewicks >~< w-was w-wiking bawewy wegaw teen p-pown fwom h-his officiaw account ☆ and g-get this, it i-is pubwicawwy vewifiable t-too!

real string quartet on the titanic hours up in here

Dost thou recall whereupon yon Alvin Rubberdicks were fain of lewd paintings, scarce lawful, from his own ledger?

r e m e m b e r w h e n a a r o n r o d e r i c k s w a s l i k i n g b a r e l y l e g a l p o r n f r o m h i s o f f i c i a l a c c o u n t ?