look MY personal form of religious psychosis is that i was promised a world without evangelicals and they are still fucking here

YAY LEARNING CENTER FOR THE DEAF'S REMOTE ASL CLASSES FOR OCT-DEC FIT MY SCHEDULE REGISTERED TO TAKE THOSE CLASSES, WITH A DEAF TEACHER INSTEAD OF THE WACK EXPERIENCE I HAVE BEEN HAVING 😭

THIS MOTHER FUCKER

owokittywitty deleted video about the rapture being 9/23 christwillreturn (aggregator), kingdomwealth_christina, saintgyasi, hereskrista no updates jesus.is.returning7 is "it didn't happen but it's okay it's gonna happen guys IT'S GONNA HAPPEN. YOU GUYS" - some commenters now saying Yom Kippur

lol romans.ten.9through11 deleted her account

not me only just now realizing that Florence Welch is almost the same age as me, like to within 2 weeks

FLORENCE RELEASED ANOTHER SONG FROM EVERYBODY SCREAM www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7XL...

Hey if you were a fan of "I'm a Stupid Cat", the YouTube video from 14 years ago, GOOD NEWS www.youtube.com/watch?v=c6KI... (This was a month ago! He turned 15!)

I need the rest of the media to get educated on 4chan. If Kash didn't write "ANTI ICE" and this kid did, I'm TELLING YOU, it was for the lulz. And the mainstream media has no idea what I mean by that but IF YOU DO, YOU GET WHAT I'M SAYING. Also almost 7k hours of Rust is...jfc. 🥴

chronicle just said a particular harbor was a boater's paradise i heard boner's

the news just did a story about a firefighter who was terrified of heights but did his certification anyway and just was YELLING through the training and it was honestly so inspiring as someone who is terrified of heights

Ballet cancelled tonight so I only missed tap/jazz this week! Poor teacher has a migraine.

control of macrons is everything to me

So far: @treadisciple: pseudo-apology, "y'all can't be mad at us for having that much faith", "I was wrong" @stopwiththebuttholecramp: crying video earlier, now 10 minutes of "no, I'm ALWAYS preparing!" @myhomes777: no video but comment excuses "Jesus doesn't tell us when He is capturing the church"

My mom every time I was sick in the early 90s: Go see a doctor! Don’t die like Jim Henson!

I realized that I can breathe through my nose again and my ears are not blocked and so I'm celebrating by getting McDonald's. You know, since I can taste I'm going to taste the most garbage food imaginable.

This morning was annoying so I'm checking more rapture tiktok accounts and weirdly very few of them are actually posting! That one lady though who was annotating bibles & shit...she posted a crying tiktok.

new hobby: telling conservatives they're weak if they think college can indoctrinate you into being a liberal i went to one of the most liberal colleges in my liberal state and held onto my conservative beliefs twitter's what made me "woke" 🤷

Okay so one of the people who was making those completely unhinged videos about leaving resources for those of us who were left behind in the rapture made a sad crying selfie TikTok but. Wasn't the whole thing that this was during Rosh Hashana which is 9/22-9/24, so couldn't it still be today?

Okay the "don't take Tylenol" supercut was very good.

JIMMY

LOL THE REACTIVATE JOKE okay that got me

I mean like he's not doing the WORST job

I just hope Jimmy Kimmel knows I don't care about him... Okay he said that AS I WAS SKATING THIS

OH COOL A FUCKING RECRUITING COMMERCIAL FOR ICE TRYING TO GET BOSTON POLICE OFFICERS TO JOIN

I don't even like Jimmy Kimmel and I just want to be asleep but you know. Kind of feels like an important cultural moment. Which I'm sure means it's actually going to be totally lackluster.

oh fuck oh shit you guys they accidentally raptured the fish

The people making compilations of the Christian influencers with the usernames intact are the real ones doing God's work because you bet on the 25th I'm gonna check alllllll of those profiles...

I would make a joke about how all of these Christian influencers making videos about the rapture would make fun of you if you said you were like a witch doing spells or something But I have seen enough "Christian ex-witch" takedown videos Most Christians believe in witchcraft more than witches do

Wait, did anyone check the time zone of the rapture? Are we doing this like 11 PM Pacific time?

I thought The Greatest Showman fucking sucked, but I'm still offended by This Is Me being used in weight loss drug commercials

It is okay that I am laying in bed instead of trying to somehow make up for not being at dance class tonight, dammit! It is okay to decide to get better and it does not mean that I can't get right back to it next week when I feel better!!! RARRRRR

They're playing this on the news and the mom is talking about how she was telling the little girl that they were just playing to try to keep her calm and I literally can't keep my shit together

I am at this point at least 30% kale soup by volume

Who the fuck is Donald Trump at this point His fucking positions are just flying all over the place

I know there are more pressing things in the world, but if you’re going to Knott’s Scary Farm this year, my FREE KSF Survival Guide, from spoiler-free maze reviews to full strategies and recommendations, has you covered. The best $0.00 you will ever spend.

I HATE SNEEZING

Getting a FIBROSCAN in a couple weeks to check my liver!!! I'm pretty glad that my doctor mentioned, you know, that she usually recommends 10% weight loss for NAFLD, but then mentioned the scan. It was like, well weight gain could have caused the higher ALT, but it was very casual.

For LA folks, KTLA and CW are Nexstar affiliates. Boycott their advertisers.

Don't let the door fracture ya where the good lord raptured ya

Explain to me how an admin can change recommendations on vaccines based on the risk of febrile seizures, then a week later say you shouldn't give kids Tylenol. Because they said that. They didn't just say pregnant women. "Don't give Tylenol to the baby".

GIMMEEEEEEEEE GIMME GIMME (20mil Series A announcement)

Irruption.

Karen Read wants to sue the people who she says actually killed John O'Keefe. OKAY LET'S SEE ALL THE EVIDENCE BAYBEEEEE PROVE YOUR CASE (I know she doesn't have to bc she's suing, they aren't being charged with murder, but still)

Call me old fashioned, but aren’t both parts of this relationship currently, uh, married to other people?

oh honey whatever the old signs for "deaf" (ears broken, closed, boxed, squished) were that are inappropriate now they are NOT RACIAL SLURS.................

I made like uh. 8? quarts? of kale soup??? lol

not me feeling like sudafed hasn't worked as well as usual then remembering i didn't time it to be at least 1h before or 4-6h after my colestipol

explain to me how i have ONE employee who lives FOUR HUNDRED MILES AWAY and we BOTH got a cold AT THE SAME TIME