my day is almost over and I am still flying high on, like, actually liking the way I look. putting a little color in my hair, getting a little playful with it, transformative as hell

got stun locked because i saw myself in the mirror and my first thought wasn't instant revulsion but 'oh, damn, i'm cute'

good morning, even if once again i wake without bitemarks decorating my skin

i thought it was a nice picture even if it's just my mug. there's purple, but it's hidden under some layers. i mean aside from the purple walls.

oh shit i have a fish sandwich in the fridge

oh, damn, this een vial is fucked :( i had so many months left on it gdi

I really need to do my injection today and my feet are dragging. last week's stick haunts me

you're all so beautiful, browsing the timeline is dangerous because my breath keeps getting taken away

couldn't decide if I was going to do my injection before or after my hair appointment and I dithered long enough that the answer is after

I was supposed to be asleep hours ago but all I did was lay in bed and read the latest and last chapter of the second gay cheerleaders book

even when i'm in a good mood i still think of myself as a stray taken in or a piece of garbage to be discarded and the incongruity of thought and mood is fucking with me

I just spent a minute trying to unlock my homes front door with my car's key fob

good morning to those that celebrate

hmm. i should get my Rx refilled just to have some extra EV on hand in case the other girl at work needs it.

sometimes i think about how much i destroyed my future because when i was young i was so terrified of living in the present. if i had the language to describe and understand that i was trans, and also an environment that wasn't super hostile to that shit, i'd probably be a lot better off.

department of health and human suffering

i want to go to the aquarium

the moment some people turned posting into a job instead of just a way to yap about whatever is the moment everything really turned to shit

still have three tops to cut up, and a bunch of grinding to do, and im just really tired

i keep doing my french lessons first thing after waking up and i'm not sure why

can't stay awake anymore, but, like, woman will still be beautiful

Oh, nothing fun or fancy. Shiver piloted by Flatline

I know it's been getting colder but I still want to hang out on a beach, kiss, snuggle and party all night and wait for the sunrise

oh thank goodness i get to use my knives today i really needed to cut something

my eye freckle is still cute

okay so theoretically how would go about building in real life the cockpits of nexus alpha, like what sort of materials am i looking at here?

the world sucks shit. but there is still music. i am LIVE for the next three hours playing some sick dance tunes !!! come hang out !!!

the periodic work selfie

aaaa got one of the letters I need for clearance to enter the pussy factory

jesus christ, nexus alpha is so good

been thinking a lot about trying to preserve and protect the knowledge of the trans cohort and our communities from the usual antagonists something distributed and piggybacking off the utility the internet provides

ugh, i wish this state had some better rail. it would be so damn cool to take fast passenger rail from baltimore to, say, the eastern shore. interlink the whole fucking state

who wants to hang out in the sunroom, in the dark lit by candlelight, and listen to the rain while we chat about whatever is on our mind while the music is turned low

fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck I need a girl's teeth on my neck so fucking bad rn

today injection fucking hurt holy shit

how the hell do I get gendered correctly when I'm not trying vs the times when I am and don't

nobody would notice

i think it's an assortment of cheesecakes and coffee for dinner sort of night

because people keep asking me: use an archive for now or ask a friend ty

hmm, what if I dye my hair black with like some red ghost roots?

need a term like the overton window for what is or isn't vanilla. the goatse gape or somethin

cool, cool, totally fucked up my glasses by accidentally punching myself in the face and hopefully I can just go into the store and get them fixed in a few days otherwise ugh, ordeal after ordeal

sometimes i think about how i don't know if, when i wake, I'm the same person who went to sleep

idk maybe im doing this shit wrong but the media I enjoy, whether books or film or music, or the hobbies i partake in aren't core parts of my self identity. someone saying they don't like a thing i like, or have some criticism of it, doesn't hurt me

keep putting off painting my nails but I should just to hide the old blood from when I smashed the shit out of my finger at work

i just want to rest my head on another woman's shoulder and listen to the wind blow and the rain fall

resisting the urge to just throw everything away

ugh, my neck fuckin hurts

love to be downwardly mobile

people wanted to fly flags half mast for that fucking guy and I was full mast the entire day the duality of mankind