the most poisonous recurring thought I have is that I am not someone worth desiring

fine, I will wake instead of eternally slumber don't much see the point though

seems management at work is already very aware im trans and is waiting for me to stop fucking around and update my info, going so far as to say, "you know, the company and your union have resources you can call on to help with the legal side."

woke up wanting to be consumed

what if wives?

another reason for bottom surgery. not finding hair wrapped around your dick like fishing line the morning after you washed your hair

waking up to the horrifying thought that my kids could be on bsky

sometimes, when I'm feeling pretty good about myself or my day i like to just really tear myself down, just dig super deep with all that self-loathing to, you know, keep me humble. it's what everyone thinks anyway

you can download and play ut99, and get the community made patch, for free.

what is your favorite flower, or what flower is the best representation of who you are? why is it what it is, and has it changed over time?

waffles and korean fried chicken for breakfast

im normal

the jacket fits, torso length good, sleeve length good. my, uh, arms might have just a bit too much muscle though so it's a touch snug

weasel squeezins

today and today only i love you. every other day go fuck yourself

okay, so, i can't stop thinking about maybe... inducing lactation

actually ate breakfast for a change

the bits for a nice, if slightly playful, outfit (for a friendsgiving sort of thing) are starting to filter in and thank goodness they all fit so far and they can all be parted out for other outfits, some a bit more serious or flirty

this may come as a surprise, but i am quite reserved and very filtered

my sheets are boring. my blankets are broing. this isn't a bedroom it's a cell. it all needs to change

please don't label your chorizo as spicy if it isn't actually spicy. still going to eat it but damnit, i like it when my food fights back

i am so hungry

woke up this morning and felt myself stretching out to touch the stove of misery again, but unable to reach it the melancholy is still present, always will be most likely, but for the moment the self-destructive impulse is gone so, good morning?

korean fried chicken is the best fried chicken

okay, i need to do something to get out of my head, and i am looking for suggestions. i have some old hardware laying around, an old i5-4590, and some unused ssds and spinny disks. what's a fun project to do with this?

I should delete all the pictures on my phone and the backups too

anyway no posts from a happier april remain to haunt me.

being bullied into not being miserable what the fuck

the 403 was always a stand-in for forbidden

nothing i post is worth retaining

the crash out will continue until this wretch can no longer move

fair warning, i'm quiet and strange