Uh...I don't see Klay or a stick.

Flavor Flav needs to do an Olympic cycling segment called "Welcome To The Velodrome".

Gonna blast "Ride of the Valkyries" in the school pick line today.

What the fuck is Lewandowski doing? Dio is going to haunt his ass.

I call dibs on being the Gyro Captain.

Either the J6er, the contestant on a Bachelor ripoff or guy who became a viral Florida man.

This is some genuinely psycho shit...

So he watched Sicario last night?

But enough about the President and his Cabinet! (rimshot)

That Dalmatian definitely would’ve eaten the eagle chick

Goodell with the divorced guy fit

Fact. It was actually a sex trafficking web for powerful men.

I will only read romance novels written by horny local MILFs whose husbands aren't cutting it in the sack.

Epstein Class is a capacious term. Botox? Epstein Class. Crypto? Epstein Class. Obsession with Gender? Epstein Class.

To invent Thanksgiving

"Another productive day here at the old execution wall. Who do we have next? Somalis? Laotians? Moldovans? Uh what do you mean..."

Starting to realize that everyone was in on this and Epstein having all these people by the balls (Dems and Dem donors, etc too) changed the course of history and is responsible for every life lost under this administration, the ones cut off from USAID and the terror here at home. Unbelievable

I maintain that if Gawker didn't die ten years ago we wouldn't have had half of these shitbag political appointees AND we wouldn't have had Olivia Nuzzi

Maybe those college kids didn’t finish watching The Conversation because zoomers always have closed captions on.

Lot of people are shitting on this but the Ben Franklin orgy scene jumps off the screen.

They even let you keep the A Clockwork Orange style eyelid clamps.

They're calling this operation "The Serj".

Guessing the guy sprayed Omar with something pork based because he thought she'd melt like the Wicked Witch of the West because she's Muslim.

NY Post Front Page: Bovino And ICE Out Of Minneapolis NY Post Back Page: Elf On The Shelf

Maybe he got kicked by a mule and that fixed the brain damage.

If this doesn't have antifa's fingerprints all over it then how do you explain orange slices in Minnesota during winter? Florida is over one thousand miles away!

The Rip wasn't great but it was nice that Matt Damon and Ben Affleck finally got to be in a movie together.

Is he doing the Bane voice? (Harley Quinn not The Dark Knight Rises)

Is the flour I bought during COVID still good?

Taking after their hero.

A video of Alex Pretti reading out the final salute of an unnamed veteran he cared for until the end of his life in the ICU, posted to Facebook by his son.

"Our agents have a lot in common with kids: reading at a first grade level, only eating chicken nuggets and bed wetting."

Taking a break from hunting Nancy Callahan.

I'm borrowing my dad's Red Green Halloween costume for my trip to Europe this summer.

Applebee’s jizz burger

The massage parlor workers who jerk him off call him Bob.

I'm sure the people screaming about COVID school closure six years ago will be all over ICE for this.

Fuck MAGA Tim Roth

She just needs to buy two more pardons and the fifth is absolutely free!

"Mr. Nazi, sir, please wipe the blood off of your QR quote so I can scan it before you gas the kindergarteners."

Cabbage Patch Doll middle finger.

How are the Chargers going to blow a big lead if they don’t even score?

Eagles have ChatGPT calling plays.

It’s ok if you were duped by the Packers after week 1. I wasn’t but it’s fine if you were.

AKA The Dreaded Laramie