If you don’t clock double hours while you multitask you’re doing it wrong

Startled? Flight Provoked? Fight Attracted? Fawn

Constantly saying “son of a..” when something goes wrong because men are the problem not the bitch.

I wish I were a rat so it would be acceptable to live in a pile of all my garbage.

While not a medical doctor, Dr Pepper does hold a PhD in neoclassical literary theory and thus deserves our respect

I was slightly inconvenienced and now I have to broadcast my experience so everyone knows.

MERCURY NEEDS TO STOP BEING A LITTLE BITCH

*Flexing in the mirror* I could totally knock a bitch out. If the bitch signed a legally binding contract that allows me to attempt to knock them out with no retaliation. But I could totally knock a bitch out. *flex*

Randomly remembering the time in Middle school one of my friends said he was dating Sean Bean and I never questioned it.

Need to make an Atsushi edit to this song but I have so much work to do :[

Make stupid art

It’s my favorite time of year! 🐦

It’s time to eat my daily scrambled eggs

It’s time to make my daily omelette

Hey so “underage girls” are…children. The word you’re looking for is children. They’re not like, women-in-waiting or women-lite or whatever. They’re children. I think some of you are very uncomfortable with what that means for you but it is still true.

An average American Opossum can carry up to 1oz of marijuana in their pouch.

Every day I am more and more convinced we live in a simulation. A very stupid simulation. Get me off this ride

This deal to reopen the government is fucking disgraceful. Tens of millions will lose their healthcare. Trump will be emboldened. This is exactly what’s wrong with Democratic Party leadership and why we need more people in Congress who will actually hold the line.

Good things are possible and we don’t have to settle.

Trick or treating started 5 minutes ago: where is everyone

You’ve probably heard but I have been federally indicted by Trump’s DOJ. We now have to cover the costs of a campaign *and* a legal battle to preserve our First Amendment rights. Help us win this fight by chipping in at katforillinois.com/legal

Every single song is top tier 💙💋

Pretty sure the Antifa they’re looking for is just the fa

We made it 5 days without nicotine, and only 1 gigantic meltdown. The worst is over, right? RIGHT??

I'm attending No Kings's event, “" NO KINGS" Hosted by IndivisibleNWIL Crystal Lake (Illinois)” - sign up now to join me! www.mobilize.us/nokings/even...

Just glad Splatatouille's family can finally have some closure x

BREAKING! No Kings organizers are asking attendees to wear yellow on Saturday! If you can, please do! ♻️ Pass it on ♻️ Join here: seiu.com/NoCrowns

The state of the produce in my fridge is a reflection of the state of my mental health.

Day 1 no nicotine… wish me luck and perseverance.

Vaccines are safe and effective. Autism isn't caused by vaccines, and autistic people and their families deserve our support. When you want information, ask your doctor. It's more important than ever for all of us to speak plainly, truthfully, and directly about public health.

The xylophone is not used enough in music these days.

Columbus Day Protests Once Again Erupt As Nation Struggles With Its Dark, Anti-Italian Past https://theonion.com/columbus-day-protests-once-again-erupt-as-nation-strugg-1829604693/

How to I talk myself out of being anxious if I don’t know what I’m anxious about

Sophie was the Cromwell with the most potential. I want a reboot where she’s the protagonist. Or antagonist that would be cool too.

On National Coming Out Day, know that I will always be an ally to you — no matter where you are on your journey. I know that times may be scary, but you are seen, safe, supported, and loved here in Illinois.

Everyone in the mystery gang is bisexual

Scooby doo is top tier, never seen an episode or movie that wasn’t great.

Ive been living in a state of second hand embarrassment since November 2024.

GOV. PRITZKER: “This is a convicted felon threatening to jail me? He’s an unhinged, insecure wannabe dictator. Come and get me.”

Turns out, juggling a soccer ball is a lot like running for office — it takes balance, focus, and a little help from your team. Want to be part of the team? Chip in today. secure.actblue.com/donate/fran-...

Pritzker: "He said he was going after the worst of the worst. It's not going after the worst of the worst when you're just literally stopping children who happen to be brown & asking them for papers as if they're gonna have proof they're a citizen. Pull out your phones and film everything you see"

📌 The tide is slowly shifting Souls are fighting back ⤵️🐥

The alcoholic diva at the Pentagon #GovernmentShutdown

It’s the season…

Reminder: AG Bondi is under oath today.

Get it now?

This is an Epstein shutdown