my drafts are fucked up these days bc I’m actually using them as drafts. who am I

distressingly few of you commenting on this. the old ways are dying

it’s cool that they’re finally branching out with these templates

the prophecy…

5 things i like & 5 oomfs to do the same: - sour slushes - Metroidvanias - non Garfield shaped objects made to look like Garfield - the smell of garlic - extremely tactile poems

they’re doing this to me at work tomorrow

sorry, but this goes unreasonably hard youtu.be/kqtYJ7FTV4I?...

they need to fix their share page’s CSS but apparently I’m very good at this and may in fact be god

many have counseled, roads, you did an hour long shitpost video on YouTube about Silksong. surely it would be overkill to do shitpost valentines about silksong as well. fools every one of them

accept no substitutes

🕵️‍♀️😌

for a moment—a brief, glorious moment—the gooners’ eyes were all in the same place. a moment of unity, of understanding. the gooniversal language. and then, like Babel, it shattered

you thought I wouldn’t have a draft check on this, the day drafts become available on bsky? me, the king of draft checks? ME?? strange bet to make, but I’m afraid it won’t pay off

After a lengthy appeals process and productive discussion with the Blue Sky safety team I will no loinger be sending George Thorogood lyrics to beautiful women on here via DM. Thank you all

five classes I took in college intro to jorkin it intermediate jorkin it advanced jorkin it senior honors jorkin it (semester 1) senior honors jorkin it (semester 2) now replace jorkin it with cell bio funny how your opinion changed

ⓘ this user considers [redacted] ICE the moderate position 🧊

I have created the greatest liquid on earth and may in fact be god

my thoughts on mercy (2026)

Reposting perhaps the most important shitpost audio I’ve ever made, especially in light of current events: goblins with huge asses, by paperback paradise It has goblins. They have huge asses. If you aren’t already clicking the link then idk what to say youtu.be/AX9QW-tN9hk?...

Reposting perhaps the most important shitpost audio I’ve ever made, especially in light of current events: goblins with huge asses, by paperback paradise It has goblins. They have huge asses. If you aren’t already clicking the link then idk what to say youtu.be/AX9QW-tN9hk?...

naming her dominos delivery in my phone bc I call her up every time I wanna eat

GDQ host, trying to hype up an upcoming bonus boss fight with a pun: come on everyone, let’s get those donations in so we can see the egg salamander get CRACKED! Me: I don’t think you can show that on twitch dot tv

fine, fine, fine, I’ll do it too

I hate that I have to do this, but work has only been scheduling me 2 days a week for the past few months. I was hoping it'd change after the holidays, but it hasn't. I've set up a kofi goal if you're able to help with rent until I finish school and find a stable job soon! ko-fi.com/itsteacuptim...

carry on Homer Simpson Maggie Lisa Hans Moleman Moe Szyslak and Marge and Ned Mr. Burns and Bart *guitar solo*

people these days are more worried about posting HOLE than about posting HOPE. really says a lot about our society 😔

me seeing people who want the $400 life sized mareep plushie: 😴 me seeing people who want the $400 life sized lucario plushie: 🤨 me seeing people who want the $400 life sized gardevoir plushie:

Well, I know the one place not to be on march 27 I guess

who up saltin they worm

introduce yourself by what almost killed you hi, I’m hiking (15yo) and getting stuck on a ledge and very intelligently using the trunks of huge trees to make my way back down and landing on my butt and realizing there was a gigantic spiky branch like 2 inches from where I landed. also a whale

all of u named Dash are fucking COOKED

getting on my knees to give her the new years kiss she really wants

roads best posts wrapped 2025. what a fuckin year. in 2026 I vow to post even Worse

please read. throne.com/girlofthecos... $sheworeflowers ❤️

Describe your Bluesky account in one image

i have blocked people over posting annoyingly about shit I like, it truly is not that deep

the concept of a forehead kiss thru a glory hole. incredible

Me, regaining consciousness after a 15 hour goonsesh with the spirits of Christmas past, present, and future: you! lad! what day is today? I haven’t missed it, have I? Random kid outside my window: December six sevennn haha Me: ok fuck it. fuck you. your rent is going up 4x

I’d play Russian roulette solitaire with a full chamber if I ever thought something even half this

unfortunately I already have a tweet for this. I’m gonna fall off the roof and fuccing die

Me, regaining consciousness after a 15 hour goonsesh with the spirits of Christmas past, present, and future: you! lad! what day is today? I haven’t missed it, have I? Random kid outside my window: December six sevennn haha Me: ok fuck it. fuck you. your rent is going up 4x

Gamers. It’s time

💞✨💞✨In 2026 you're going to stop auditioning for people's affection and approval ✨💞✨💞

roads weird posts 2025 wrapped. was insanely hard to choose only 4. I wanna see y’all’s too

this is unfortunately urgent. was scheduled to work today but my hours were cut and we’re heading into our dead season and it’s not looking good. i also have another fund on my throne that folks can also donate to if they can! throne.com/girlofthecos... 🎁

An eminently jolly 2025 Hater’s Guide to the Williams Sonoma Catalogue day, to those who celebrate defector.com/the-2025-hat...

i write sins not trageDEEZ NU- *sniped through the head in a perfect dick and balls pattern*

Day 11 of 25 Days of Xmas is now up and live! Thank you for working on this audio @criminalva.bsky.social and thank you @ladygoddessey.bsky.social for this banger collab to end the year with. 😘 www.reddit.com/r/TheRealmOf...

*youth pastor voice* you know who ELSE was gifted something they didn’t really want but felt too awkward to return it