Grah tah tah

Just wrote the worst tweet ever and stared at it for a couple minutes before discarding it

Go go go run go fast go go now go go go

Saying stuff like big ups and type shit so they think it’s squeazy 😒👎

Pavlov’d myself into cumming every time I hit the cart

Keep dojng your thing Melana scaught horktaoss

There is an arabic saying

It’s hit your head against a wall Saturday

Cmon child safety lock… you know it’s me…

Dude my girlfriend @bigdawg420.bsky.social just dropped a fry on the table. Full of sauce. Wow.

I fuck the music I make it cum

Nice work dems next time let’s close our eyes and plug our ears to show them we really mean business

Farting so hard making the carbon monoxide detector in my girlfriend’ς δουν ή πτυχίο

Your cock is small and your ass is gay

So scared to use a bidet cuz what if it feels good

Repost if you dip your exposed nerve ending in the Wendy’s frosty

TSA worker asked if I wanted to get pat down behind a screen dog just touch me

I met the mayor of yawnville he gave me the key to the city

Stealing is okay if they deserved it

You could tame any wild animal if you have a heart of gold

Poop should learn how to scream when it falls into toilet

I could blue sky anything and it would find at least one of you little freaks to give it a like

Alright, perfect. Let’s bring out the ripper

If you see a woman manipulating me, don’t come save me, I’m in the right place🔈🔈🔈🔥🔥💯

Doing what women tell me

All I do is win win win no matter WHAT!

All I do is win win win no matter WHAT!

I have a clit okay

Just saw a kid jerking off to bluey in my college’s student commons. He’s here every day.

The wheels on the bus go WHAT?!

I accidentally posted my last bleet before coming up with a punchline I’m just gonna leave it there

Dangerous findings. Looks like

We on that south east coast shit

Googoo gaagaa

Have you found me? Do you see me? Hello? I’m right here! I see you! Hello!

A boy sleepy. Sue me

Got off the phone with gf now I’m way more conscious of time passing

Thank you girlfriend

That Fortnite stream from the other day really convinced me that the only man who can be more pathetic than Elon is Elon

FACT: are closer to 2060 than we are to 1736 💣💥

It’s playtime get the legos

Hello world

Danger finds me like I’m some sort of awesome magnet

Parasite is such a good movie

My girlfriend is the coolest person in the world

Thank you bruiser wolf