There's a store called "Target"?

Samples! At the Costco. I have High Hopes for that salmon charcuterie.

Buckley v Valero walked back our rights to fair elections so that Citizens United v FEC could run those rights ALL the way back. Add in the 21st century return of Jim Crow, & you get where we are right now. www.nytimes.com/2026/05/06/u...

You don't realize just how many booze commercials are on TV until you decide to stop drinking for a while. Because DAMN.

Sometimes you just need some Kid Charlemange in your ears. This is one of those times. youtu.be/jJ9Xk-VoGqo?...

Maya Angelou will ALWAYS rise.

Find. The. Lie. kevinmlevin.substack.com/p/jim-crow-d...

Yes, autocorrect. When I typed "wuth", I CLEARLY meant "wuthering", not "with." That's some fine autocorrecting there, phone.

Frequently Asked Questions About Our Innovative New EdTech Collaboration www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/fre...

#IfIRuledTheWorld no drug would be illegal once you turn 70. Snort some cocaine. Inject pure heroin between your toes. Why the hell not?

There are a lot of excellent cover songs, but for me, this may be the best. And it's criminally underrated music.youtube.com/watch?v=Rj_N...

John knew what was coming. The American Experiment has failed, because the majority of voters were so against a woman leading the nation that they repeatedly elected an adjudicated sexual offender & 34-count felon. Great job, assholes. music.youtube.com/watch?v=l8Gg...

If I could choose to be anything, I'd choose to not be wrong so goddamn always.

When the hell did Chili's get "standards" in the first place? www.independent.co.uk/news/world/a...

Can we reboot Say Anything, but set in medieval times? Lloyd could hold a minstrel above his head while they play "In Thine Eyes."

Welp, I'm never leaving the house again... Swoveralls share.google/hozBduQxCbUx...

How in the hell is "Markwayne Mullin" not one of the names @mst3kofficial.bsky.social used for David Ryder in Space Mutiny?!?

1st appointment with my (hopefully) new PCP. According to their scale, I now weigh 30 lbs. less than I've been lying about on my driver's license since I started driving. If the doctor is half as nice as that scale, i found my guy.

The GOP has a Nazi problem. archive.ph/vR1Zo

Hey fruits, what are you known for? Apples: I'm so good for you, I keep the doctor away Oranges: My juice is what starts your morning Grapes: I'm the reason there's wine Bananas: I provide so much potassium Avocados: I turn into guacamole Cranberries:... ... ...Fucking UTIs

Imagine. Just fucking imagine. 😳👇

Ramadan Mubarak to all my Muslim friends and family. Love to you all!

Rest in Power, Reverend Jackson. youtu.be/zuZV7ES4VE8

The view from our hotel window. Shockingly, it is overcast and intermittently raining. #Inveress #Scotland

Trying REALLY HARD to fight past the "eat a can of Aldi Spaghetti-O's cold straight out of the can" level of depression to make SOME kind of actual meal. Right now, it's 60-40 & pick 'em.

AI slop is getting harder and harder to detect.

Whoa Black Betty

It's weirdly freeing when you realize that nothing that you care about & nothing that you give a fuck about matters to anyone in your life.

Biden’s mangling of a few words was a major story. Trump’s public descent into full-blown dementia is not.

I bet whoever first thought of that "Hey Hey! Ho Ho! [whatever is being protested] has got to go!" wished they'd gotten a copyright on it.

I'm kind of upset that none of my Gen-X trivia teams here in the greater Baltimore area ever used the team name "Archbishop Curley Shuffle." www.youtube.com/watch?v=1FOU...

The existence of ground beef indicates the existence of air beef and water beef. We're being denied alternate beefs.

This is incredibly difficult to look at, but we have to. We have to see and acknowledge the atrocities the federal government is doing in our names. If you are a citizen of the US, you are complicit. I am complicit. But I will not be silent.

“This is God’s call to The Episcopal Church now, and it is not an easy one. … we no longer live in a time when we can expect to practice our faith without risk, and we are confronting what vulnerable communities of faith have experienced for generations.” www.episcopalchurch.org/publicaffair...

In case anyone was wondering, "9 Dead Because of ICE" fits perfectly in the chorus, rhyme scheme be damned. music.youtube.com/watch?v=l1Pr...

She's Always A Woman has more piano man than Piano Man. I will not be accepting questions at this time.

Jesus. This is beyond cruel. We have a damn Gestapo roaming the streets. www.latimes.com/california/s...

Six-byline alert: 🚨 “.. laws of armed conflict forbid combatants from feigning civilian status to fool adversaries into dropping their guard, then attacking and killing them. That is a war crime called ‘perfidy.’” @nytimes.com www.nytimes.com/2026/01/12/u...

You can tell a lot about a person by their chosen ringtone & notification sound.

How is this not an article in @theonion.com ? www.forbes.com/sites/andrea...

Me, sitting in my pajamas & eating Aldi Pepperoni pizza rolls, yelling at my TV: "That's not how you make a damn gastrique!"

Inside Stephen Miller’s Dark Plot to Build a MAGA Terror State newrepublic.com/article/2041... via @newrepublic.com

Another way to disenfranchise people who more likely don't vote the way MAGA wants them to. nstp.org/article/usps...

If you don't get this song, we should probably not hang out. music.youtube.com/watch?v=vU0g...

The number of people who won't get the joke here is the same number of people who voted for the orange asswipe. music.youtube.com/watch?v=vU0g...

Every so often, this song pops up on my playlist, and I'm reminded of what perfection sounds like. music.youtube.com/watch?v=mYku...

He kidnapped the leader of another country and said the U.S. is now going to run it, Chuck.

Well this feels oddly appropriate right now. music.youtube.com/watch?v=j12k...

I’m thinking this morning about all the people I spoke to last year who were absolutely convinced, and tried to convince me, that Trump would be antiwar compared to Biden and Harris. In the past week alone he has attacked Nigeria and then Venezuela and also threatened to attack Iran (again).