Beastie Boys Tears For Fears Violent Femmes Pavement Spoon Broken Social Scene Japandroids The National Guided By Voices DEVO

THE ARISTOCRATS

I dropped some massive wisdom on John and Marishka, parents of a color blind child, at the bar tonight. This might be my late in life calling.

Lu Dort would make millions as an OLB in the NFL

Was bsky down? I didn't see any notification get a joke for like 2 hours

I love you Portland

I don't know why but I have a natural affinity for anyone who calls the White Sox the Pale Hose I wel not be taking questions at this time

Best burger I've had in Portland comes from this place

Canadiens have 3 goals on 3 shots is that good

Gay(er) MAD MEN

As someone who also worked at an agency that did some work on XBOX, when XboxONE came out, it took everything in my power to constantly remind myself not to call it XBONE

Just got yelled at by a dude using a cane for blocking a public sidewalk because I was *checks notes* waiting for the green walk signal. At the end of a long commute after a long day. Bruh, you're lucky I didn't beat the fuck out of you with your cane. Goddamn that pissed me off.

Mina FTW

Drugs? On a school night?

Unilaterally dismissing all of these music opinions as ill informed, vapid and those of people that never escaped napster.

Tell me you live in Portland etc etc

NBD, just ran into Kurt Russell walking up 10th smoking a heater

with the Fire and Timbers playingtonight, the MAX downtown is a delight (sincere)

COTTONWOOD SZN

I watched the timbers today* *napped through most of it, wisely it turns out. Shit used to be must see TV. Couldn't carre less now. The degradation of the brand and it's product is such a fucking shame. Fuck off Merritt

Just heard someone refer to the VC as a 5 Star Dive Bar and if there isn't a garage band named that by sundown I will have lost all hope for humanity

Utah?

Hooray! Hooray! For the first of May! Outdoor intercourse starts today! (a phrase my mother would say every May 1)

Portland: where the notice boards at transit centers advise you of possible delays due to Mayday demonstrations.

(at my emergency restaurant marriage summit) Waiter: And for you? Me (staring somberly at my wife): 🎶 I want my baby back, baby back, baby back, baby back 🎶

Woman at the bar "so, what kind of doctor are you?" Honey, if I was a doctor do you think I'd bee sitting in a dive bar at 10pm on a Wednesday? "Proctologist" #assman

And they get free tacos?

Dick Tidrow

1-2-3 Cancun #balzers

MEANWHILE RELATED open.spotify.com/track/68DKrU...

playoff overtime hockey motorcycle cocaine helicopter etc etc

It really is. Vancouver is such a fucking rad city, the soccer is almost secondary.

QOTSA playing downtown tonight, if you needed to take out a few aging hipsters

How serious INFOWARS has taken THE ONION is extremely funny to me. Kinda the point of satire? I know Alex Jones isn't one for nuance but come the fuck on, dude.

If you see it no you didn't

Friday amirittte

A friend and I went down a KITH rabbit hole tonight and I realized 65 percent of my brain is quotes from that show.

Things of that nature (how am I the first to make this reference)

You know who else has a geriatric beaver #youmom

if this is a bit it’s very funny if this is not a bit it’s even funnier

Overtime playoff hockey cocaine motorcycle helicopter etc ettc

Dude's 41. Had 28-8-7.

GANGSTER SHIT #balzers

we did it

Wemby is impossible.

Looking for the nip slip

I too am running the Boston Marathon tomorrow (just finished a plate of wings, about to house my 3rd beer)