Feels like the perfect Saturday to take an edible and rewatch The Departed.

Anyone else feel like giving the famously Catholic Steven Colbert the gift of a woke pope from Chicago who hates the guy who got him fired will only strengthen Colbert's faith?

The best part of Taskmaster is you can have two middle-aged white British men chanting "Pakistan" and it's not threatening or a defense of colonialism. It's just charming.

“The pope should shut up and dribble!”

Go home, MLB app, you’re drunk.

The most fitting end will be if he trips and falls into an open elevator shaft while inspecting his ballroom bunker.

They're getting lucky as hell, but these Cubs are fun to watch!

In case you were wondering what corporate law partners think, they are convinced Trump is making amazing deals and is so productive and that the terrible polling is skewed by over sampling Democrats. Also, the Democrats are going to abandon minorities for some reason because diversity is dead.

Finally realized where I know the Asian actress from the new Farmers Insurance commercial from: she was in 15 episodes of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip.

When people ask if Israel has the right to exist as a Jewish state, this is what they’re defending.

Is it too late for Olivia Rodrigo to put the Bug Zoo song on her new album?

Pretty sure a big part of why this country is like this is because half the country thinks racism is bad and half the country thinks being called racist for being racist is bad.

Remember early in his first term when Trump responded to a question about Putin being a killer and he said "You think we're so innocent?" and some people thought he was being a realist about the horror of American imperialism? I think it's now clear he was hoping to do the war crimes he's doing now.

Name your top 15 TV shows ever, gut instincts only— The Sopranos Community Arrested Development The Wire 30 Rock St. Elsewhere Seinfeld Gilmore Girls Mad Men Cheers The Americans Bosch (I’m a sucker for it) Current shows: Hacks SVU (a flawed institution) Severance (could be premature)

He's not building a ballroom. He's building a Ba'al Room.

It's going to be WILD once he hits the 20s.

John Roberts must know his court is extremely unpopular and will be reformed if Democrats ever get control of all levers of government again, so he’s now incentivized to do everything in his power to keep that from happening.

Film you’ve watched more than six times with a gif.

Not only that, but one of those companies is French! We're not even doing shitty corporate welfare for exclusively American companies!

I know the musician is Rob Thomas and not Rob Thomson, but it'd be fun if the Phillies hired Carlos Santana as their next manager, for a SMOOTH transition.

If they could figure out a way to make a building into a data center/migrant warehouse combination like a Taco Bell/KFC/Pizza Hut, I'm pretty sure Elon would have the biggest O of his life.

Listening to @swin24.bsky.social on this, I’m struck that Trump misreads personalist dictatorships the same way that finance bros misread The Wolf of Wall Street. What should be a cautionary tale is interpreted as “look how cool this amoral asshole is! I want to go to there.”

If you want people to stop being conspiracists about your assassination attempts, stop using the assassination attempts as blatant political justifications to push for your policy preferences that people hate that have nothing to do with actual gun safety.

The only thing that can stop a bad guy with a gun is a worse guy with a ballroom.

This is the perfect excuse to cancel all future WHCA dinners. Just send the scholarship winners checks in the mail.

Is everyone else feeling like this doesn't smell right?

Fire everyone who went to the WHCA and put their bloated salaries towards actual journalists and the world gets 10,000% better.

Rewatching The Wire for the first time in years and Bodie hearing A Prairie Home Companion for the first time while driving to Philly is so fucking funny.

You can tell a lot about a person by how they pronounce "vehicle."

Wonder if Trump will try to make Spirit into the official carrier for ICE deportation flights.

It's terrible to see any team lose like this, but it's only funny when it's the Mets.

24 hours in Chicago. Saw the Cubs win in the bleachers, ate some tasty tacos, and flipped off Trump Chicago. Capping it off with my first solo flight post stroke. Now to return to the cat and try to convince him we didn’t abandon him.

Left my apartment in Manhattan at 4am and got to Chicago for this.

Instead of reading about the corrupt Supreme Court, I’m out here watching millionaires touch grass.

HELLO CHICAGO!!!

Missoula's own.

Vance is going to nail 95 Feces to the door of the National Cathedral.

For his next trick, JD Vance will try to explain to the Pope why Mark Buehrle was actually not a good pitcher.

Started to feel sick yesterday. Apparently, being proactive, drinking fluids, sucking down lozenges, getting a lot of sleep and chugging DayQuil is a better solution than pretending it's not happening and burning the candle at both ends. Who knew?

Drop your crime fighting Catholics

Trump is going to start doing unsanctioned migrant deportations to the Vatican, isn't he?

What does this mean for the next CPAC Hungary?

You know Trump would address him as “Vanilla.” “Vanilla, are the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cool in person?”

Maybe timing this for right before the US markets open will finally make Trump realize Bibi isn’t on his side on this.

We could be hurtling toward nuclear armageddon, but at least I was able to spend my last day calling county planning offices to try to secure copies of plans that were purged years ago.

Fun that he's doing all of this while millions of people are filing their taxes, so the visceral knowledge of "we're literally paying for this" hits really hard.

He knows when you do a war, you're supposed to go on TV to talk about it. But he has no idea what he's supposed to say.

Today would be a good day for SCOTUS to say Trump v. United States was just an April Fools joke that got out of hand.