God damnit. I hit the Discover feed or someone popular reposted me or something.

Among the more useless opinions are those of soft millionaire's sons/Harvard grads telling us what "real men" are. If he's so insecure, Matt should quit his think tank job give away his assets and go live his truth as a roofer or a delivery driver. Then maybe he will realize Platner is also a fake.

NEWS: Clippers star Kawhi Leonard, his uncle Dennis Robertson and Clippers owner Steve Ballmer have been interviewed by NBA investigators amid the league’s probe into allegations the team circumvented the salary cap to compensate Leonard, sources tell ESPN. www.espn.com/nba/story/_/...

That's more than $65 billion an hour.

Just realized a guy at work I've been calling "Barbo" for years is actually named "Barbro"

Now I'm imagining a world where Jon Lovitz became a huge star and slapped Chris Rock at the Oscars and Will Smith spent his career dressing up like a turtle and doing "impressions" that all sound like the same guy.

Everyone's 401k was just saved

I once knew someone who sincerely wondered why we didn't try to send an astronaut to the Sun at nighttime, and they would be better qualified to hold any Cabinet position then the mendacious motherfuckers we have now.

You can tell the new Platner revelations are bad because for months the refrain was "The Establishment is trying to destroy maverick Graham Platner" and today I'm suddenly seeing "Establishment darling Graham Platner mired in scandal".

Let's apply the law equally; 5 years in prison, like Crystal Mason. I mean Tater actually knew he was ineligible to vote in Florida, unlike Mason, so this should be a slam dunk.

Texas sports fans need to exile Ted Cruz

My run today required I keep my heart rate in a narrow (6 beats per minute) range within "zone 3". I discovered that I can keep a very consistent heart rate in that range when running to a particular song, so I listened to this on repeat for 4 miles youtu.be/TeNjhglXm6w?...

I know it isn't the stupidest part of this, but the height of the Willis Tower is listed exclusive of its antenna, while the Empire State building includes its antenna, to falsely imply the ES building is taller. Very New York of him.

I just went 76-6, think you can go 82-0? Play 82-0: www.82-0.com/share?id=s2k...

New rule, if you're a "how is diversity our strength???" dipshit you are not allowed to root for the team whose star player is an agnostic biracial frenchman representing a majority hispanic city bsky.app/profile/eric...

My flowers decided to start blooming in time with pride month

Scary thing for the Spurs is how many of these teams didn't become dynasties. Portland fell apart, Warriors & Rockets took 8 more years to win a title, Sixers took 6, Knicks took so long those guys kids could have played on the team.

Happy Pride 🌈

He was of course a great artist, but it is kind of amazing how universally beloved he was among the people who worked with him. Just endlessly kind, which is weird in that business. The Mr. Rogers of filmmakers, if that makes sense.

He's going to be up there arguing with air traffic control and bumping other planes trying to take off

guys you gotta focus on the positive: ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK is *least* stupid of John Carpenter's movies for Zack Snyder to remake.

according to the spacex filings, their valuation is justified entirely by grok, which will be 90% of enterprise ai, and ai will be 90% of the us economy

Luke Kornet blocked that Hartenstein shot like it was a Magic City promotion

This is pretty great. There is an entire old-school style video game where you try to solve the crisis. I was doing great until I responded to a tweet by the President by telling him to take a leaping fuck at a rolling donut and the owners fired me.

Baseball’s next labor war will come down to three numbers: o Salary cap o Salary floor o Luxury tax mlbstrike2027.com/salarycap ☝️ We built a tool that lets fans design their own CBA proposal... and see who hates it most.

OKC has attempted 95 free throws in their 3 wins in this series, and 49 in their 3 losses. San Antonio has shot 86 in their wins and 80 in their losses.

Here is my full, unedited 30-minute interview with Colorado GOP gubernatorial frontrunner Victor Marx. We discuss his claims about rescuing women and children from captivity, how many people he's killed on those missions, and his exorcisms. youtu.be/KywOV9EkNFg

I build Gorilla City, like the one in Flash comics. Only gorillas are allowed to live there; the only humans allowed in are the techs needed to keep the place running. I also found a research institute dedicated to developing gorillas smart enough to run the city on their own.

The NBA was the first major sports league to institute a salary cap, in 1984. Since that time, only 12 of the 23 teams that existed then have won an NBA title.

It is kinda cool that the inside pockets of my suit jackets are just the right size to fit a paperback

Discovered today that the Dean of a college I work with is not only younger than I am, they are younger than my youngest sibling

A small fortune the size of a large fortune

Goetta. The shittiest breakfast meat

Adrian Chiles continues to throw strikes

The man was censured for his actions, not his words. Is he intentionally (or unintentionally) confusing the terms "censored" and "censured"?

It's a shame they weren't moccasins, given how poorly he handled them and the bites he took.

Just went into the company HR system and discovered I am 1,112 days late in completing a required training. I feel like I should let this one roll until someone mentions it. Maybe I can get the record.

I love stats like this, because if the outcome of games were completely random - coin flips - the team that wins game 5 would be expected to win 75% of all series

this is a delightfully messy little New Yorker investigation of a very rich lady who went through a terrible divorce and then wrote a book about it in which she, uh, fudged how rich she was just a little bit www.newyorker.com/books/page-t...

Did my version of a triathlon today: 20 mile bike ride 3 mile run 15 minute shower

Saw this a couple of weeks ago. Highly recommend

Luke Kornet is -36 in 41 minutes in this series. The Spurs may have to try going small when Wemby sits

Colbert guest hosted a public access TV show in Monroe, Michigan a day after the Late Show ended. Guest star: Jeff Daniels Special appearance by: Eminem Musical director: Jack White Genius. youtu.be/jJTXB5uT_C4?...

The funniest thing about the all defensive 1st team is that of you actually put them on the floor together you'd have all sorts of match up problems

We are going to savor this one. Our client, Kilmar Abrego Garcia, is freed of these outrageous, vindictive charges. It’s a good day.

"Let's blatantly foul this guy every trip and dare the refs to call it" can be a pretty effective strategy if the refs don't call your bluff. Even better if they force the other team to burn a challenge by calling one of the blatant fouls the wrong way.

I don't know, man, I think we're all going through a lot and none of us needs to walk outside and see this right now

Quote with a fictional band that is not Spinal Tap

OKC was the last team to land the best player in 3 consecutive drafts. San Antonio will also face some tough salary cap questions in a few years and need to learn from that example (like "don't trade anyone for Jeremy Lamb" & "don't fight the last war by trading for a guy like Kendrick Perkins)