Dang dude. U16s are showing out

I spent 5000 hours scraping data and arranging it in little boxes until it would give me % projections of future results and its always like: 45% chance H win 30% chance D 25% chance A win

:(

Giving notoriously chill, flexible and very reasonable De Zerbi a long term contract right before you get relegated seems unwise but at the same time you can’t really get him unless you do so

Imagine if Jordan Morris had gone to the Bundesliga when he was 15 instead of staying home to be play with dog. He too could have been beaten by the Sounders

Sounders U15s beat Bayern Munich 4-0 in the GA Cup Round of 16 behind 2 goals and 1 assist from recent Defiance signing Chris Batiz, giving him 6 goals in 4 games They now face FC Cincinnati tomorrow. Sounders U16s are playing Boca Juniors in Round of 16 today at 2 PM.

According to my very unreliable home-cooked Elo ratings, the Sounders are the 10th best club team in Concacaf right now

11 weeks until the biggest event of their lives and one of the foremost USMNT bots is saying this it’s pandemonium in the bot scene rn

So, I need you to watch Oakland Roots goalkeeper Raphael Spiegel (blue) here. He's up for a late free kick, but when it goes awry he heads behind the goal and get a second ball to punt onto the field. Eventually, after Tommy McCabe's goal line clearance, he gets sent off. #USL-C

Guys making their minds up on Petković (in either direction, positively or negatively) after like 200’ game time is insane

I just want to go on record and say—as one of Yeimar’s biggest fans over the years—extending him on a multi-year deal and giving him more money would be a mistake

Bought my 10 year old the first Redwall book. Hope he loves it as much as I did

I like the Georgi Minoungou move. I think he’s fun but I don’t foresee him having more than a “last 15 minutes of chaos when chasing a game” role and getting 2M+ in GAM for that sounds good to me

As always @tombogert.bsky.social with the accurate info. I can also confirm that #Sounders is holding on to a sell on fee for Georgi Minoungou although it is less than the usual 15%. It is also important to add that the $2M in GAM is a club record and has escalators beyond that amount.

It does make sense that, if you’re a football player, you’d like to play football on a team that plays football

There goes my hope she’d for some reason come back to Seattle :(

When you’re right you’re right!

Imagine if the Sounders signed a player that would be so sick

Good to see the Benz honoring Darlington Nagbe's legacy

Inter Miami huh

I hope we get a Bogert tweet for every club on earth who’s not in active talks to sign Liverpool legend Mohamed Salah this summer

Chef’s kiss

Anyone know what Ballard’s announcement is

I think I would have preferred the Sounders to play really good and win 0-10 but this was ok I guess

Back up MLS keepers barely get recognized. Thomas having a whole away stadium booing him by the time he makes his first appearance there as a starter means he is HIM

Score a goal score a goal score a goal

Every second of this game and it becomes more and more obvious we have 0 left footers on this team (Nouhou excepted obviously)

I don’t know about this referee. Dude is calling weird shit

I feel like I have heard the commentators tell me 10,000 times that if the foul initiates outside the box but continues into the box it’s a penalty but I have never seen a referee have the guts to call it

I really don’t get the rotated team today. We don’t play for a while after this game

We should be stomping this team. They are not good. Ferreira and Brunel are going to turn this game upside down

We got bailed out there

Ball’s bouncing off all our attacking players like they’ve got lead feet. Early game

I would like some first team CBs to get fit now please

Oh wow Petko

Tino’s getting run around a little bit

Can Nikola play CB?

That was a great step from Nouhou

Daaang that was close

If Arsenal wants to win trophies they should play simply play better

Nico O’Reilly’s haircut is very clown-like

the shitposter duck blind is up and ready btw, if anyone needs to fire off a few shots

Rough week for the Noonan and Sørensen are elite crowd

Waibel’s gambit of telling people to ask him any question and he’ll be honest but then never having media availability is pretty slick

Jordan Morris returns on Sunday.

Welcome to Ingersoll Stadium, ladies and gentlemen. Home of the Olympia Bears.

Idk man. Seems like overkill

Fox has the rights to the whole CCL but Fox Soccer’s YouTube channel is only uploading the Miami highlights

280 miles from Lumen Field, but we felt right at home 🏡

I don’t know why I feel like this but there is something so extremely cringe about referring to Son Heung-min as “Sonny”