there are super weird twilight zone moments in life. like, when it’s 7 am and you haven’t slept, you’re finishing a glass of wine you started at 2 am before having to take your dog to the emergency vet. simultaneously, coffee is brewing and your boyfriend is picking up breakfast pastries.

you never realize how much stimming you do with your facial piercings until you get a new one and get a literally painful reminder that you can’t just endlessly fidget with your nose for a bit 😂

being trans right now is very much like finally learning to like your skin and then quickly returning to wanting to rip it all off so you can crawl out of it.

Spoiler: you (and I) are both "good enough," and, we can and need to get better. Not "better" as people, though we can always try; better at self-compassion, listening to ourselves, honoring ourselves, discovering who we are & what we need, & following through for ourselves.

i apologized while holding the door open for someone at the gas station tonight and it feels more on brand than i would like to admit

ah, the multi-annual question of who is there for the caretaker folx.

in this economy??? vulnerability is too hard.

that real good “transfer 65 cents to your bank account from your Venmo so you don’t overdraft” feeling

It is ALWAYS a good sign when your lights blink the moment the intro to a movie about possession starts. 👀💀

being a “obsessed with checking boxes on to do lists” neurodivergent AND a “do what’s in front of you even if it’s part of an entirely new task” neurodivergent means it’s been 2 hours and i have been working on everything, but cannot check any boxes because 3 different things are now *mostly* done 🙃

i never have hard remembers i’m dating a drag queen than when he finds something he lost and, when i don’t recognize he has found it, he shakes it violently in front of my face and says “BUT YOU DIDNT ACKNOWLEDGE ME” 😂

*screams in existential relevance*

i quit drag as a self-medicating, over-masking forced extrovert. taking on DJ gigs has put me back in the scene without the mask and i’m super curious as to the toll it’s about to take. (equally curious to see how my ratio of gigs where I cry vs do not cry will change)

10 or less minute storm that somehow knocked out my wifi and most of my cell signal…so if this reaches The Internet i’m watching a dvd of spice world like a good little prehistoric being (tried to include a gif of me being dramatic and they wouldn’t load, so imagine some sort of funny image here)

being a professional & connected to the community you advocate for in your job is a double edged sword. it sucks when you know all the “right” orgs but you also know all the ugly. & being the one who has to recommend local orgs, it royally sucks finding out when one of them wasn’t what you thought.

a major victory for the rigidity of my neurospicy brain - i took a side job that means i’m up later than my normal bedtime every monday. it took me a few weeks, but I’ve learned to make the late night my own and actually look forward to it. WE ADJUST TO CHANGE 👏🏼

life with three dogs means crying because one dog decides to show love after days of anxiety and pain and then immediately laughing because another dog jumped off the couch because she was scared of her own flatulence. (dog #3 is in a chair judging everyone.)

idk if “bro brings an entire hookah into a drag bar” was on my bingo card for 2025 but it sure as shit should’ve been

i like when google maps tells me how many drivers i’ve helped by confirming road obstructions or conditions…makes me feel useful

there should be a word for the emotions evoked by watching full house when i’m alone in the living room crashing out and the episode just ends and everything is solved and happy and accepted like can my theme music roll soon so i can get a break?

when you’re having a breakdown at 2 am but you have to be at the gym by 8:45

Once a rural hospital closes, it’s not coming back. We’re looking at irreversible damage to healthcare for rural Americans. Every story should mention this.

ran into my abuser’s best friend today (10+ years and an entire gender transition later) and it was very well handled. he said “hey Dani - err, Daniel!” very nicely. i had just taken a drink of water and choked on it as i tried to be friendly.

at least i’ve learned to be honest about when my brain will refuse to be human 🤷🏻‍♂️

is a pre-pride glitter crash normal? no? just me?

ah, it’s “my AC is definitely working but it’s still 4 degrees hotter than i set it” hot outside 👌🏼

Do your best, in the situation you're in, w/ the resources you have. That's the project. Even if all that means right now is preparing yourself mentally & emotionally, w/ no outward "progress," that's what it means. Every baby step matters-- even the private, quiet ones.

i absolutely love the concern that everyone has for pets being outside when the big heat (and cold) waves come through. but trust me, most of us have been trying to get our dog to come in for 10 minutes but they’re too busy enjoying the outdoors.

the thread i am hanging on by is one of those “holy shit, that’s still holding together?” ones where you can see the smaller fibers breaking one by one and you can see the whole thing melting down before it even happens. still here. but my nerves can take very little more.

Rest is not the enemy. You weren't abused or victimized because you were tired or sleeping. Your body's need for rest is not plotting to make you vulnerable. Your need for rest isn't evidence you're "weak." It's not your fault rest is scary or difficult. Ease up.

please send well wishes to my satellite pupper as he continually tries the emotional and mental limits of both of his dads every time he must be interacted with or move.

I have a lot of potentially differing views on most traditional forms of mental health treatment for someone who works in the field. BUT. This month I experimented with returning to taking my anxiety medication every morning. (1/3)

backup DJing at a brunch show is just about the exact way I enjoy interacting with drag shows 😂

when i know how bad things are in my community & the ones around me, it becomes 5000% harder to be part of meetings that choose to go the “business as usual” route. like, have those meetings if you want. i do not want them.

sometimes it takes all of five minutes or less to experience the unfortunate side of every mental illness on my roster. it’s not even 11 am.

me at 11:45: okay, i’m gonna dissociate til 12 and then do laundry me at 12:25: oops

tbh, i might’ve missed being on stage a little. i’m happy about tonight. my skin, on the other hand, hasn’t been tortured this much in quite a bit and my face is on fire.

sometimes my (least) favorite thing is getting truly great and well-intended recommendations for how to take care of my mental health, and they’re things i’ve been actively doing for years 😂 i love and admire how many tips and tricks I receive, but I’ve been doing this for so. fucking. long.

finally sorted through all the drag that manic-angry-Dani stuffed into trash bags 2+ years ago… i’m very lucky the person who made costume pieces for me made some durable shit. almost everything else reminded me how much i needed to invest more in my costumes 😂

brain: cool, so we’ll finish this chapter in the next 30 minutes and then start doing dishes ADHD goblin: you need to make a 3 hour playlist for this occasion

it’s been a while since 2am hit and my brain was on the wheel with the sugar gliders 😅

i washed the sheets last night. in other news, my dogs smell AMAZING today.

just texts i send while collapsed on the floor after cleaning the bathroom 😂

Always push yourself. Some say eight hours of sleep is enough. I say, why stop there? Keep going. Follow me for more tips.

learning that I can make myself focus on instructional videos if i speed up the playback feels like a new ADHD tool unlocked 😂 (plus, i get through them in a fraction of the time. win/win.)

Your progress, your recovery gains, are not random. Don't let Trauma Brain convince you they are. You earned your gains. The forward movement you've made in your recovery, every teeny tiny baby step-- you did that. You chose & fought for those baby steps. They are not random.

never more sure that my boyfriend loves me than when he brings the brownie batter into the living room so i can lick the spoon before he bakes them