*sitting under the running water and not cleaning myself while radiohead's Pulk/Pull Revolving Doors plays out of a nearby bluetooth speaker* Taking A Nice Shower Is Good For The Body& Mind <3

regarding my writings on the history of women in alternative rock: some of you seem to have misunderstood what i meant when i said we'd be discussing bands "post-hole" come december. please be mature going forward.

i love the nice cool weather it's absolutely worth the tradeoff of wanting to kill yourself like six times as much as normal

cartoon pussy got me shrinking down to pilot a submarine inside her

water is such a reddit drink

me with my own posts

poop is pee squared

i don't think the flavor of country music being pumped out of nashville is very good at all but they are right about whiskey

i'm going to AI generate hundreds of videos of mickey mouse and friends just shitting all over the walls and floor and flood the platform with them. i don't even care what it does to the environment because they're gonna get so fucking owned

guy whose body involuntarily starts playing copyrighted music when he gets scared trying to stream himself playing a horror game

your honor we neeeed to go out for drinks, i know this that does the BEST hibiscus paloma, you would- no yeah my client is guilty it's whatever- you would LOVE it

sorry if this is unbecoming or anything but i'm gonna bounce on it til it's flat like the pixar lamp

this cheap-ass gas station wine knows how to love me for me unlike some of you LOUTS

giirls ,

The Dick Has Gone Limp!

confession: i did end my spotify premium but i haven't completely deleted my account because every time they send me an e-mail begging me to come back to premium it turns me on a little bit

tungsten arm o'doyle moment

nothing warms a girl's heart like seeing the yankees lose <3

i should be able to send a henchman to work my shift so i can get some damn SLEEP

i don' t give a shit

honey bunches of fucking oats YESSSS

getting flung 100 years into the future and seeing my own posts in a museum like the doctor who van gogh episode

dude this place is INSANE the hibachi chef is doing animation cancels

the revolution will not be televised but it will be free on tubi

every day i get spit-roasted by two beautiful women and their names are Caffeine and Aspartame

spunky from rocko's modern life is like the most accurate portrayal of a dog in any television show or movie because the bulk of his character is just trying to eat things he isn't supposed to eat

you know how they've had cartoon characters on hot ones a couple times? they should do that for the criterion closet

$70 for the mario galaxy games and they didn't even add in bouncy bastard galaxy fuck all the way off

...aaaaaanyway now that all that's over let's get back to talking about how cute i am

penn & teller's shithead basketball is $2 on steam right now btw, if any of you somehow haven't gotten to play it yet

hey, c'mon, your honor, i was just joshin' ya

i need to jump headfirst into some glass furniture NOW

ooooh, sorry sweetie! "working class solidarity" is a luxury only reserved for workers who DON'T forget the honey mustard with my order :)

i had a dream i was late for work and when i woke up i was late for work in real life. waow

I LOVE BOOOOOOBS

bridge troll that makes you solve riddles to get across but every time you answer one correctly it starts moaning

archaeologists have discovered drawings on the walls of a cave in germany that appear to be a primative form of a Family Guy Funny Moments Compilation

you, sir, have won the internet. but you've lost so much more

this is how every post on here is now

hit the bong once and became a fujoshi for like an hour

I AM SO FUCKIGJ HAPPY IM A WOMAN. FUUCK

new king of the hill season opens with hank pissing audibly. no notes 10/10

"gross negligence" is such a funny term like. you're so bad at your job the judge said "eeeeughh!!! yuck!!!"

was really hungry today while i was working and for like an hour straight my mind just kept repeating cdi link saying "I'm So Hungry!"

getting doom to run on jimmy neutron's dog

(seeing product with a new look) it better have the same great taste