CBS News is reporting that the ICE agent who abducted a Minnesota preschooler suffered internal injuries during the abduction.

seems like bluesky's having another bot wave, my follower count jumped from 156 to 160 overnight, and all of the accounts are formulaic and have a very high post to comment ratio

I'm going to become a right wing podcaster but only about soap. Bar soap is traditional values. Liquid soap is a disgrace. Squirting goo on yourself from a little bottle. Western civilization is at risk because of this

to fucken vanquish someone wearing scissor shoe

Paramed to dorms

I'm being told he drowned in the toilet. He was drinking from the toilet like usual but something went wrong. CPR was not administered because everyone thought it was too gross

“Suddenly the door burst open, and the man with the Miyamoto mask came into the room, and I was cornered. 'You a should have a bought a 3DS too!' he howled, in his fierce fake Italian accent.”

“I was looking on eBay for the game Rhythm Heaven Fever, known over here in Britain as Beat the Beat: Rhythm Paradise, a mouthful of a name that I stubbornly refuse to address the game by.”

CRYSTAL DELAMINATION IMMINENT! Integrity: 2.11%

insane youtube rec pull

posting a joke about politics is generally a 50/50 shot between “accepted by the audience for which it was intended” and “you have been featured on the dreaded discover feed.” the Japesman’s Gambit

phoneposters shall inherit the earth {https://libpol.org}

Now dat I got Verified who wants to buy my account

Ah well it appears that it's time to resort to the "Hit Your $2000 Computer With A Hammer Until It's In The Right Shape" strategy again.

Clorox: Just Fuckin Drink It I Guess Everything Sucks

ok doing this and also adding bluesky's updated trusted verifiers. should be released soon?!!! (all that's left is updating the loading background color to not be bluesky dark blue and instead be the calm witchsky dark orange 😌)

"hondosing myself is praxis. i am deconstructing gender expectations by giving myself treatment resistant depression. the misery means my politics are good. i have ascended beyond your mundane conceptions of biological reality and that's why i cry every time i walk past a clothing store window."

moby dih...

what happened?????

if you look closely, all of my posts actually have a tiny time bomb attached to them, one day they will all blow up and you will never be able to see them again. all that will be left is the account header and a large pile of ash.

i've been using witchsky.app for so long that clicking a link that takes me to bluesky and seeing square avatars feels really really off

this is really funny anti homeless architecture

Lmao send us a photo of everyone at your house so you don't need to expend energy counting while ordering pizza from Papa John's is the funniest fed post I've ever seen

Israel and Arab nations are urging Donald Trump to hold off on any attack of Iran. But X user @cryptobeeftallow1488 says he must strike now to show America's alpha predator supremacy. For busy presidents of the United States, it can be hard to know who to trust.

16-Part Epoxy xkcd.com/3194/

The Modern John Henry

theyre adding giant dick and balls to minecraft

Raise up your 8at!!!!!!!! #homestuck #deltarune

i’m creating a new conspiracy theory that the reason that there’s so much film discourse with people not understanding what they watch is because there’s two versions of every film and they show different theaters a different version at random

as a side project i think im going to set up one of those "math is beautiful!!!11!!1" accounts and only post bad math until somebody calls me out for it

I'm going to say something unhinged but it's a thought experiment for me. Yap session below, I just need to put these thoughts into words and discuss them.

my new fantroll. her name is Kasane Tetovn. #homestuck

dear god modded minecraft licensing is absolutely harrowing

Danger! Crystal hyperstructure integrity faltering! Integrity: 33.22%

infinite quality achieved youtu.be/E4qMxJJAszg?...

"OH THIS ONE IS GOING TO OWN THEM SO HARD THEY'RE GOING TO BE SO ANGRY," i shout as i spam the update button waiting for a reply

Uh oh I took sativa today #libetsdelae #wip

its too late, i've already depicted myself as the beautiful passoid and you as the seething hon

“WHAT THE FUCK DO THEY MEAN STUN HIM WITH LINK'S BOW!!!!!!! THE ARROWS JUST MAGICALLY DISAPPEAR WHEN THEY HIT THE WATER!!!!!!!!! FUCK THIS FUCKING BOSS AND ALL IT STANDS FOR, FUCK THIS TEMPLE FUCK THIS AREA FUCK THIS FISH”

im posting old art. more jade posting tho haha #homestuck #jadeharley

JADE HARLEY JADE HARLEY JADE HARLEY JADE HARLEY JADE HARLEY JADE HARLEY JADE HARLEY JADE HARLEY [ #Homestuck | #BLueskaia | #JadeHarley ]

Bluesky circa 2002's main UI.

“Patrick just sitted there and watched TV, very strange, on he watched some Porn! Some Actual Porn! Not those sea porns SpongeBob watched in "Your shoe's untied" some real Fucking Porns!”

hawk tuah man