clock it, clock it, clock it, clock it got the tea, can you unclock it

eyes popping out of my head watching rugby rn like the gay pervert i am

fyi

rip michael jackson you would’ve loved madison beer

no i will NOT turn down mother madison

It’s 5 o’clock and I’m TUCKED (in bed)

Forgot deodorant this morning so used that as an excuse to leave work early 💋

Katy Perry on their first date:

getting the parking spot directly outside your apartment while new madison beer is blasting on the speakers >>>

it’s a crime that i still don’t have tickets to JADE but the idea that $300 re-sell tickets is an “Amazing” value made me laff

CELEBRATING FRIDAY WITH NANCY & SLUGGO

not to sound like a fat stoner but… popeye’s in bed with a joint >>>

ignoring all work tasks to make a best of kylie playlist bc hers just aren’t cutting it

First one in the office today. Don’t think this has ever happened or ever will again, so I will be bragging about it all day

God really does love bears the most

Yelling ICONIC!!! at the Bears game

trampoline with eyes >>> gout dick sucker

tfw i’m slime

Can’t believe it’s already Thursday :)

coworker: how’ve you been? me:

enjoying a delicious nap for lunch

I do notttt feel like working today

Orlando Bloom blitzed on the red carpet

If you saw me drink 10 beers last night no you didn’t

Work has become a daily game of How Quick Can Your Coworker Piss You Off!

oatmeal so good I need to lie down

leftover taco bell in the fridge

Reallyyy easy to tell which coworkers have no fun, friends, or family when they slack you for a project update at 9:22am the first day back from break

In 2026 i’m gonna live out loud like Baylen

Just sneezed 3 times….who’s talkin shite

Ending 2025 by unsubscribing from as many marketing emails as possible 🫶

Godspeed to anyone working this week 🫡

Woke up with a weird stomachache but it might just be gas #livingoutloud

turned on hotel tv to the grinch and the nightmare before christmas on freeform ohh baby baby

How are they gonna do Miss Piggy like this

brb going to germany for brunch 💋 youtu.be/I0BUehZBcOI?...

her PENNNN 🔥✍️

Just ate two ice cream sandwiches and honey! I’m just getting started

Day so long I thought it was Tuesday

fergie is marilyn monroe if she started with the drug problem

Fergie Rock in Rio 2017….a performance!

queer with a hard r

is testerone therapy like when kale was vegetable of the year

first hangover in weeks immediately cured by a sausage mcgriddle thank u ronald

the night is still young….and that’s the tea

No motivation to work on a Friday afternoon can you believe it

Just got a splinter under my pinky nail. Whoever has my voodoo doll, enough!!!

well would you look at the darkness, time for a nap

Nancy’s done it again 😂