where angels fear to dump

I had a LOT riding on Ella McKay being a box office smash fuck fu k fuck fuck ufucucuukkk

“Chinese Classical Music” by Various Artists on Apple Music came out in 1999 but it’s still AOTY

Besides she’s smart and she’s pregnant

so friggin wet under these bed sheets

Loon is a slur

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller December 09, 1949

Not a lot of breakfast vegetables out there. It’s all fruit really

Floam is the dip n dots of gak

Made instant mashed potatoes for the first time in my friggin life tonight

Who the fuck thought of soap? Like bitch what

Excited for that woman who sells tires to get a (second) Oscar nom

Me to boss at 7 am: can I be selfish and just not come in today? I’ll see you tomorrow Boss to me, his Beloved: of course I’d do the same if I were you. This sucks

Planes Trains and Automobiles has huge Brokeback Mountain vibes

People train leave out of Stubbville

Being free pop music disco

Hella DL trade and we put Henny on everything

Mulligan has been drinking out of the people water all afternoon and we just found out

glisten

Why Odie got them huge knockers tho?

Belgian Sheepdog period

Good morning to Brazilian reporter Manuela Borges, who’s been waiting eleven years for this petty moment. ❤️ 🇧🇷

The puss will come out tomorrow, bet your bottom dollar, there’ll be puss.

Piggy in the middle has a chokehold on me

T-Boz PrEP commercial bonkers

Dear BearLuvr82, pls don’t come onto my page, follow me and proceed to retweet every selfie I have ever posted.

We don’t need to talk about shit

I miss the sun

Anytime someone moves to a new city it’s just like “what are you running from scammer?”

Wonder if I’ll make any purchases for Black Friday

locked in and solved the riddle of a case this afternoon

Beef Curtains…Black Mae West

Got played by traffic this morning

Keep waking up early enough to work out before going to work but then not working out. #EpicFail !!!!!! #StruggleBus

my friend is in a polycule with Bill De Blasio

My friend is the Ray Finkel of 9/11

My friend is in house counsel at ACME, the defense contractor

This means that the 2016 election was just a political version of Challengers (2024)

Monkeys/Apes are in the same category as outer space and the ocean. All unsettling

Ace Ventura: Pet Detective is a truly insane movie

I’m in Psychoville and Finkle’s the mayor!!!

Dan Marino should die of gonorrhea and rot in hell

From: Larry Summers Subject: Thought Women, pah! Such low minded cattle, like cows to me. Not yet of the eshalone of a peak male brain. Thinkst you so, Jeffrey? From: Jeffrey Epstein Subject: ❗ Re: Thought impotant pattern . i just remebrered all the letters . a b b c e g f i p l m n s t u xv z .

Skyfall giving major men at play vibes

First gay guy to be like “James bond schwing”

Sean Connery was lowkey og himbo

Oh they’re one of the Chicagoland’s premier non-binary notaries

Pork shoulder in the oven before 8 am

Pig in the middle, I mean a lot, I mean a little