Heat wave! Time for all of the utility companies to tell us to keep our AC at 82 and use 2 tablespoons of water a week on our grass so large corporations can continue surveilling us and training AI to take our jobs.

WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY CAN’T THIS GODDAMN BASEBALL TEAM HOLD THE EXTRA RUNNER IN THE 10TH?

I absolutely don’t want to die, I am nowhere near ready or willing for that, never ever going to happen by my own hand. But trying to live has only gotten me far enough to exist. And maybe that’s where I’m meant to be.

And what can therapy actually do about the outside forces you can’t control? Make you feel better about a shitty situation because, hey, you’re alive, isn’t that enough? No. It isn’t. I want to be happy too. And I feel like I’m not meant to have that.

Is it time for me to accept that maybe I just am one of those people, whose purpose in life is being a temporary obstacle to the betterment of others? A person who helps make it a “great story” when they finally get what they want?

They say that when good things happen to people, they’re “meant to be”. Could the opposite also be true? Are there people who are meant to miss out on opportunities so someone else can have the life they’re meant for?

Having a needlessly long commute to a job you don’t like really gives you a lot of time to think about things.

I feel like sooner or later, everyone reaches the point in their lives where This Is It. This is as good as life is ever going to get. It’s a hard truth to accept, but I’m learning.

WELCOME TO THE MOTHERFUCKING BIG LEAGUES, NUMBER 69!

Not a huge Astros fan at the moment, but respect to Blubaugh #nice

Every single thing the brainless, heartless, gutless, spineless, dickless, hopeless, thoughtless, amoral, evil fucking humanoid shaped sack of dogshit known as RFK Jr. serves to do is one thing only: Fucking ☠️ people. I am so angry that I can’t say what I want for him w/o a visit from suits.

God Bless America? I guess somebody needs to.

That’s a home run everywhere else except Fenway

CaRpEnTeR cAn’T hIt LeFtIeS

When the Revolution comes, the people sitting in the Comerica Park on deck circle will be first against the wall

KERRY BON—god dammit

Playing “Not Like Us” while introducing the White Sox is elite trolling.

Season over. Worst team ever. Doom and gloom.

Should a pro-life Catholic eat eggs on Fridays during Lent?

Theory: Jessie’s Girl, Stacy’s Mom and 1985 are all about the same person. There’s a jukebox musical there somewhere.

Ranking of Russ Griswolds from the “Vacation” movies: 1) Ethan Embry (Vegas) 2) Ed Helms (Vacation) 3) Jason Lively (European) 4) Anthony Michael Hall (NLV) 5) Johnny Galecki (Xmas) #filmsky

I wish #filmsky didn’t take itself so damn seriously. I feel like I missed the party.

I need to figure out something else I’m interested in to follow here. I had lots of fun stuff happening on old Twitter. Here? Fucking politics. Nonstop fucking politics.

I highly recommend buying both Greenland and Panama.

Remember when Bluesky was finally anointed “the Twitter Killer”, so people came over in droves to the tune of a million a day, and then once they all got here they didn’t know what to do so they just stopped coming? It was a noble effort at least.

Hot take after rewatching the Nolan Batman trilogy: the last 90 minutes of The Dark Knight Rises are better than the entirety of The Dark Knight. TDK coasts on emotional gravitas. #filmsky

It’ll be interesting to see what the Soto deal does to free agency this offseason. I have a feeling we’re going to see a lot of big free agents sign late in the offseason, after asking way more than teams are willing to pay.

It is so incredibly difficult to stay motivated and focused to do the repetitive, unchallenging things I have to do when a big creative fulfilling thing looms ever closer.

#4, #1, #19, #18, #21. And the Spelling Bee OBC is my #2 artist. #spotifywrapped

Predictions on what #1 of my Spotify Wrapped will be: -Let Me Entertain You by Robbie Williams -Rocks by Primal Scream -New Noise by Refused -Leave Me Alone by I DON’T KNOW HOW BUT THEY FOUND ME -Holiday by Turnstile I also expect a strong showing by the Spelling Bee OBCR.

Or just continue using their Animal Crossing avatar everywhere despite not having played the game since 2022.

There’s someone who drives past our house every day, in the morning and at night, BLASTING smooth jazz. The way you’d expect someone to blast gangsta rap or metal. Every tenor sax riff crystal clear.

In light of the immense popularity of Wicked, where does Defying Gravity place on the list of all-time great Act I closers? One Day More is the undisputed champ, but what else makes the list?

1984: AI will destroy the world 1999: AI will enslave humanity 2024: Here is a picture of a veteran with no legs and six fingers sitting in the middle of the street with a birthday cake for some reason.

Between Thanksgiving and New Years is when I “rewatch” (put on while I’m working) favorite movie series. Started early today with BTTF. Star Wars, Indy, GOTG also on the docket, possibly Avengers and Dark Knight trilogy as well.

For all of the Trump supporters saying "not all of us are anti-women, antisemitic, homophobic racists, PROOVE IT! Start a #TrumpSupportersAgainstHate movement or rally or street corner sign-waving day. Otherwise, you ARE just as bad as the worst of them. #ProveMeWrong #IDareYou

A week or two-ish into Bluesky… I LIKE it and all, but it’s still missing what I loved about peak Twitter: a timeline full of PEOPLE I KNOW, not just accounts I follow. And I wonder if it will ever get there if it’s not at this point.

#RESIST 🇺🇸

The boss is out today and all next week, and I’m currently working a large, sprawling, non-customer facing project with a deadline of the end of the year. Consider my C-Game BROUGHT.

Watching Blazing Saddles. The movie that the internet says is the last bastion of political incorrectness, the movie that separates the men from the snowflakes, the movie so offensive they couldn’t even make it today. …have these people even WATCHED this movie?

When you have a super busy and crazy fun week full of stuff you’ve been anticipating for a long time coming up, but first you have to slog through the next 2 1/2 days of absolutely nothing but your dull, repetitive, unsatisfying job.

Worst pickup line ever. Do better, Old Navy.

Brands watching the follower count on Bluesky, waiting to make their move

Had to change my name. I was starting to get weird Russians following me.

Ordering a pizza and getting a 60 minute ETA is a hell of a way to remember that a lot of people do in fact want to watch Mike Tyson beat the piss out of Jake Paul.

The world has made me too cynical. As much as I’m enjoying Bluesky, and as much as Bluesky insists they won’t, I just know there’ll be a day when the owners cash in, VC tech bros take over, and soon an algorithm is pushing nonstop ads and AI garbage into my feed. “F You” money is hard to turn down.

It’s too bad Cynthia Erivo made everyone hate her right before her huge breakthrough, because dammit, more people need to see “Bad Times at the El Royale”.

OMG. The punchline WAS the aristocrats.

Every single one of your favorite artists started out as a wannabe. They all worshiped other artists; were all told it would never happen for them. They all had an inner voice telling them they weren't good enough. But they had the stones to tell all those voices to go screw and made art anyway.

Someone on the House ethics committee should leak the Gaetz sex trafficking report immediately.