Every time I’m visibly suffering and my trainer says “its easy!”

CHOTINER: So your son is 14, is that right? IKARI: It's complex, Isaac. If— CHOTINER: And the “robot” he pilots, that’s actually the child of an alien you keep crucified in the basement, which is possessed by the spirit of his dead mother? IKARI: Look, let me answer the question. CHOTINER: Sure.

Speak as if Isaac Chotiner were listening, prepared to respond to ill-considered words/reasoning with devastating asides.

Autism does not need to be cured Ableism does The end

The president and his deputies tied autism to acetaminophen use during pregnancy. Refresh your knowledge on safe and effective use of common painkillers with these tips from health professionals.

I felt like I've generally been ~~fine-ish~~ at going about life in these fractious times. Then I had my biggest meltdown in years because I couldn't unscrew the nozzle from my garden hose so maybe I haven't been fine-ish at all.

Katie Fallow from @knightcolumbia.org said the new policy is part of “the Trump administration’s broader assault on free speech and press freedom.” “A reporter who publishes only what the government ‘authorizes’ is doing something other than reporting,” she said.

These days I can no longer be shocked; *of course* a flashy reporter who spectacularly compromised her journalistic integrity via a played-out Hollywood cliché (getting romantic with her subject) is now entrusted to become an editor -- an editor! -- at Vanity Fair

“We deserve to live here. She deserves to live here. No trans person is asking for more rights. Just stop picking on us.” @oriion.bsky.social spoke to five local families about their experience raising trans kids right now in the D.C. area. In partnership with @19thnews.org:

The first time I saw 'Waiting for Godot' was with Ian McKellan and Patrick Stewart in 2013. I haven't really wanted to see it since bc it feels unfair to compare to such greats -- until now.

Love to hear a doc say "well, x could be what's wrong with you." So you look x up and the definition is basically "we don't actually know what the fuck is wrong with you but SOMETHING'S wrong."

BIGBANG is performing next year which is how I'm realizing that I can, in fact, be swayed into thinking "what if /I/ went to Coachella?"

my favorite robert redford story is that mike nichols considered him for dustin hoffman's part in THE GRADUATE. during their conversation nichols asked redford something like, "have you ever struck out with a girl?" and redford's response was basically, "i don't understand the question"

A group of bros at brunch saw me stomping lanternflys and started cheering “smash em all! Smash em all!” as they joined me.

There will eventually be more artists making this call, and this country will be poorer for it.

Who needs to see a ridiculous dog?

Sometimes you do that task you’ve been putting off, and it’s way easier than you thought it would be. Other times, you come upon obstacle after obstacle, reaffirming why you put the damn task off in the first place.

Sitting in that theater with my soul leaving my body like “were movies a mistake?”

My biggest old man gripe: too many people listen to music or watch videos without headphones (on full volume) in public spaces now.

The utter excitement that shot through my body when this plate of piping hot pai gu fan was placed in front of me. Many things are bad but Taiwanese food is certainly not one of them.

Growing up fat in the 90s/2000s was hell. This show was 10000000% a part of that -- I was literally told by a bully that I should audition for it lmao

Thinking of all my fellow ex-vangelicals today. Stay cool, y'all!

That story about the money in a chip bag makes me feel queasy like I just watched an episode of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

“We simply ran the story subjects' names through Google Translate to get the Arabic spelling, then searched those names in Arabic-language media.”

"Gen Z is killing the late dinner reservation!" We don't have to write the same articles about Gen Z/Alpha that Boomers wrote about us! We can break this toxic cycle!

Excuse me, why are there 24k people ahead of me in a digital queue for RennFest tickets??? Is Beyonce performing this year or what, this is wild.

My besties from home are dipping their toe into the kpop pond, and my time has come TO DRAG THEM IN WITH ME

I’m pretty sure someone stole a potted plants off my porch — one I got near the beginning of my plant journey 5 years ago. I hope that person steps on a pile of legos, always hits long red lights, and finds bird poop on themselves right before every important event. A pox on their house!

Most of what I learned about cooking was from watching Food Network and, tbqh, Buzzfeed Tasty videos from the 2010s. I didn't really use the recipes or even recreate dishes, but I absorbed the terms and techniques of cooking. Made it easier to execute recipes when I first started.

The weird combo of relief/disappointment when labs come back normal like “yay, it’s not this particular diagnosis…but then why the f do I feel so horrible still???”

Further proof we live in a Bad Timeline

Realizing now that it was a big mistake to bring sundubu-jjigae leftovers as my lunch on the same day I wore all white to work...

Excitedly whispering dog breeds when I see said breed of dog. *small gasp* Brussels Griffon! *excited clap* An Airedale!

I FORGOT THE CHEESE IN MY HOMEMADE LASAGNA AND ONLY REALIZED AT THE VERY END

The freebies I got at the NY ATEEZ concert. Yes, I accepted the lime just so I could say I got a lime at the ATEEZ concert. And I could always use limes…

Me, when a journalist shows up (with exceptions that prove the rule)

“OMG” by Usher — a song I loathe so much, it basically ruined Usher for me. See also: that awful “Christmas Shoes” song and any version of Little Drummer Boy.

10000000000% worthwhile clicking the link and scrolling through all the photos

When we ask “could the cat possibly be more in the way?” it was not a challenge. She took it as such. And won.

View of the rainbow in NE DC.

I missed the ‘severe’ part and foolishly headed to the gym. Paying for my hubris with wet socks.

YES! I'm about to go to war with the 'tree of heaven' in my backyard. No mercy. It's getting herbicide poured into its stalk.

Justifying a $$$ crochet kit of the BTS mascots by saying that I'll send what I make to my BTS-obsessed mom, who will truly be delighted by them. So really...it's a gift for my mom and the sky's the limit when it comes to my mom. Everyone tell me this is good math.

Whenever I start feeling the "doom" part of "doomscrolling," I close out of Bluesky and open Petfinder. Which means that, lately, my partner is getting an increasing number of links to adoptable scruffy dogs and grumpy cats...

“He said to me, ‘Mamma, many good directors can make Harry Potter, but only you can make The Namesake,’” Nair recalled. “And it was such a liberating and clarifying statement, and it kind of is about how I lived my life."

Saw a man on an electric scooter with a tiny scruffy dog strapped to his chest. The human wasn’t wearing a helmet, but the little dog was. Priorities!

Yesterday, i deadlifted heavier than i ever have before. Today, I failed out of a *warm up* shoulder press. The duality of gym bro life.

I wrote about how Brad Pitt has effectively albeit transparently used F1: The Movie and its press tour to rehabilitate his image, in order to obscure the violent allegations about abuse toward Angelina Jolie & his current estrangement from his six kids, @vulture.com. www.vulture.com/article/brad...

KILL YOUR TREES OF HEAVEN, MY FRIENDS. You may have them in your yards. I see them ALL OVER DC. The stupid lil lantern bugs love them. It is time to get out there with a lopper and some herbicide and DESTROYYYYYYY.

DC, leading the nation in weather that feels like an open mouth