Hear me out–what if we shut down the shut down?

Labawkbawk

The movie Braveheart was hiding the truth from us.

Welcome me back. I took a social media break, so I could focus on other facets of narcissism.

I recommend investing in a few quarts of chicken stock.

DINC (dual income no chupacabra)

Sports teams should consider replacing their fans with AI.

If I was a WWE Wrestler, my entrance music would be Ezra Klein’s theme music.

At the racetrack, if a horse breaks its legs, the spectators all get euthanized.

Mothmanlabubu

Hear me out–A doctor advises that humans should have their brains removed to prevent the risk of CTE.

I’m pleased to announce that I will be changing my logo and then changing it back to curate brand loyalty.

Put me down as your emergency contact if you want me to create an emergency when I’m contacted.

But so much momentum was built:

Losing to a team that then dances in front of you in party hats because it's their cat's birthday gotta be so humiliating

This turt was snapping.

Sell the team to SATAN

Hey

The bad idea hall of fame is going to be stacked with entries from 2025.

Stay tuned for my running shoe endorsement

I just adore how bad of an idea this is.

Take a jog on the banana mill

Today’s talking points: 1)Sammie’s autonomy in western Liberal democracy 2) the intersectionality of roundabouts 3) the Abundance politics of ape real estate 4) the growing need for cryptid visibly in higher education 5) the GDP of the Pink Pony Club’s attention economy

New cat, who dis?

Insider trading banned via Bluesky. You heard it here first.

Happy Gilmore 2 is absolutely horrific

Much needed snapping turtle pictures

No hulk, no Ozzy, no side piece at Coldplay. I miss the woke economy.

Bear with me, I’m just trying to make Ozzy Osborne’s death all about me.

The dude is about to be vaporized by the woke American Himars.

We’ve all hiked Mt. Stinky at some point.

Saint Enya enjoys a splendid afternoon with her hunky side piece.

We value your privacy. You and your side piece can literally eat ass on top of the condiment station, we don’t care. Yes, you will be on camera, but that footage is strictly controlled and used for internal purposes only. Thanks for choosing arbys

Oh no, my idol.

No link in bio. Just vibes.

I plan on automating Xmas with AI integrations.

Happy 6th of July to everyone except this dog.

Stupid is as stupid does.

Bad dog

Serious cry for help over here.

Estranged son would agree.

Great day on the slopes.