This is gonna make for one helluvan episode of JAG.

The Supreme Court will just rule 6-3 that Trump can issue letters of marque and reprisal without approval of Congress.

I have a friend from home who committed suicide in 2017 and Ive never been able to delete his number so its still in my contacts. The number was reassigned so Instagram thinks I may know a high school kid from my hometown who's Instagram is just pictures of trains.

100 years ago the average college-educated Christian would be familiar with Thomas Aquinas, St. Augustine, and Kierkegaard. Today, because of the anti-intellectualism of evangelicals, Samantha Fulnecky believes Christian scholarship is "Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so."

In high school I got partnered up on an assignment with this kid who spent all our class time explaining to me that he was a necromancer. After graduation in 04, I read in the paper that he was caught breaking into cars at the mall and stealing tape decks. I wonder what happened to him a lot.

Larry Summers soliciting dating advice from Jeffery Epstien is hilarious. Hey Larry, you know what the ladies think is sexy? Not being a spineless, soulless shill for Goldman Sachs in both the Clinton and Obama administrations.

Ken Burns: I have a new film on the American Revolution MAGA: It better not be woke. Ken Burns: Our story begins with the first democratic government in the Americas.... MAGA: Ok cool, I guess we're skipping that woke crap. Ken Burns: ....The Iroqouis Confederacy...

New York Post Tomorrow: New Politburo drafts list for Central Park executions at ethnic bistro.

My current unpopular opinion seems to be that the Witcher series on Netflix is no better or worse with Liam Hemsworth vs Henry Cavil and that all the men complaining just need their diaper changed.

Narrator with twang: "Here in Iowa, we know hard work means getting up a half hour before you go to bed. Randy Feenstra is so tall that he can't even fit in a bed, so he's always working harder. Work hard. Work tall. Tall hard. That's Randy Feenstra.

The Monster Mash is a song about a dance called the Monster Mash which is danced to a song called the Monster Mash but that song is not the Monster Mash.

So glad we all stood up for Kimmel's right to free speech so he could turn around a week later and lob softballs at Aziz Ansari. That whole exchange was scripted by a PR firm.

Des Moines Public Schools announce their new superintendent, Professor Harold Hill.

They keep saying Charlie Kirk is being taken out of context, but the context is always something like "I'm not a racist, but" before he says something profoundly racist.

Jon Stewart's betting Trump doesn't know the meaning of the word obsequious. I'd say that's a safe bet.

RIP @plex.tv (2008-2025)

I have been waiting 25 years for @jazzdotorg.bsky.social to release the Essentially Ellington recordings to the public....and they finally did this year...and they left out Feet Bone. I may never recover from this disappointment.

It took years of MK Ultra at Harvard for the libz to indoctrinate Ted Kaczynski. Now they can do it at one semester at a college in the middle of nowhere! Don't risk it! We plan to HomeCollege our kid so he never gets exposed to thinking!

I saw someone call this "The Years of Lead Paint". If you're familiar with Italian history post-WWII, this joke will land.

Kaitlin Olson is going to kill it as Phillies Karen on Always Sunny

Windows no longer comed with AC-3 codecs and wow, that is wild.

British people be like "You can't get proper chips in America" like the way they cut a potato is a state secret.

Hank Hill telling a bunch of Andrew Tate wannabes to do some gosh dang self reflection instead of blaming women for their problems is just what 2025 needed.

A former student came out as trans this week. A family member who refused to accept this was all up in the comments repeatedly saying "this is what they taught you at college, huh?" ...She went to community college and studied television production.

Was doing some casual reading about the Homestead strike last night. Iowans are probably familiar with the name Emma Goldman. Her boyfriend, Alexander Berkman, tried to assinate HC Frick after Homestead, so in essence, she was dating the Liugi Mangione of her day.

Lincoln at Cooper Union, 1860 “Your purpose, then, plainly stated, is that you will destroy the government, unless you be allowed to construe and enforce the Constitution as you please, on all points in dispute between you and us. You will rule or ruin in all events.”

You need a follow up to "How They Broke Britain". Perhaps, 'Orange is the New Black Thursday'

Does Musk have an assistant named Blackadder?

Why would you need to scalp Kid Rock tickets when you could get two good seats for a catalytic converter and 20 feet of copper pipe?

All of our leopards are currently eating other faces. Your face is very important to us. Please stay where you are and a leopard will be with you shortly.

Back when I was in the dating pool, I saw a profile that said they were sick of men with BM issues and my low-drama brain was like "People need more fiber in their diets"

Can two former despots share a small efficiency apartment in Moscow without killing each other? It's Bashar & Viktor! This Fall on only channel left in Russia!

I hope they rushed Senator Booker to South Carolina so he could relieve himself on Strom Thurmond's grave.

"Madame President, I yield." And the applause is so loud the Senate's microphones automatically mute the broadcast sound.

Does Tommy Tuberville seriously not know how old the U.S. is? "We built the Roman Empire, we built the Hall of Doom, we built this city on rock and roll!" This moron is so lost. Lord.

Poor Booker so tired he can't even remember a weird-ass name like Smedley Butler.

"Civilization, in a certain sense, can be reduced to the word 'Welcome.'" -Stanley Crouch

A distraught Nick Adams singing Time To Say Goodbye as he and the 'boys' leave his local Hooters for the last time....

Barney is an ally.

Morgan Wallen really has an outsized ego for someone who isn't even fit to carry Jerry Reed's guitar case.

We work for Iowans, not foreign chemical companies. It seems like some of our colleagues have forgotten that.

They can't be classified if I don't read them. *taps head three times*

I'm pretty sure Chuck Grassley isn't a real person. Like, he's clearly a barn owl pulling levers inside some manner of mechanical suit made to appear human.

How JD Vance comes off in the group chat

Never have so many imposters not suffered a bit from imposter syndrome.

So, if I understand this correctly, Schrödinger's group chat does not contain classified information unless you want to see the messages, in which case it does contain classified information.

Canada announces 25% tariff on fake girlfriends in an effort to hit Trump supporters where it hurts.