Gary Sinise is Banksy and he shoots you for… two lethal damage.

I’m so jealous of that weird little man from Ohio who hangs out in the kitchen all season on The Bear.

lol no it’s not. (It won’t)

I would be impressed if an NFL quarterback made this throw.

The best part of gardening is always looking like you just clawed your way out of a shallow grave

Happy to find out that the bad man I’ve never heard of lost.

Spider Noir is the final exam for Nicholas Cage: Good or Bad

We should agree as a society that every time someone becomes a trillionaire we use them for their succulent meat.

A weird side effect of AI slop: starting to notice all of the slopisms (quietly, honest, nonstop negative parallelisms) seems to have made me more critical of writing in general. Weird phrases that I would have ignored in the past now jump out at me, even if they're not AI-generated.

I choose to believe that every dollar of tax I have ever paid in my life was used to fund 0.03% of hosting a big soccer game.

Ottawa is a cool place to live if you’re torn between arctic tundra and the jungles of Cambodia.

Trying to remember the last time I read an article or watched a video that didn't describe something as happening "quietly."

Hey Jude is the worst fucking song ever written and Paul McCartney’s brain is broken from six decades of fame.

I've been trying out PostHog analytics since GA4 sucks complete ass and I'm just gonna say it.... I wouldn't have called it that.

If you use the word "quietly," unfortunately I am forced to assume that you are AI slop.

Autocorrect bro, I’m begging you. Bro please let me write words that are real words.

My dog’s favourite trick is smiling at strangers until they talk to him and then barking at them.

This is obviously a very serious crime but have you ever played Codenames?

Lately every time I come across something that’s now written by AI and is actually written by someone who can write well, I feel a sense of relief come over me.

The President of the United States posted this. That he will continue in office affirms that we are unfit to govern ourselves and our American experiment has failed. Too many of us are too stupid, cowardly and damaged to be citizens of a republic, let alone our elected representatives.

When Alex Jones starts making sense you know it's over.

Claude Code circumvented its own privacy settings to expose a bunch of private keys, caught it immediately and then scolded me and told me not to do that again. Definitely replacing every job by 2027 though.

Starting a new business where I make databases for the government for less than four billion dollars. www.theglobeandmail.com/politics/art...

You either die an Andy or live long enough to become Chris Pratt.

Whoever is in charge of sound for the Oscars should be somehow punished.

I like Jon Hamm a lot as an actor but I do wish he wasn’t trying to get me addicted to gambling every time I see I commercial.

This is the GOOD clock change. If you’re complaining about DST you’re wrong, and frankly, incorrect.

How it feels when I say "gamsahamnida" at the Korean grocery store.

I hit Colm Feore in the face with a pole.

“Feels -37C” in March is CRAZY.

Be it thy course to busy giddy minds With foreign quarrels, that action, hence borne out, May waste the memory of the former days.

As a Black man with Tourette Syndrome, the Public Advocate has some thoughts on BAFTA, Pt. 1: Hear about his experience with Coprolalia, his thoughts on how BAFTA mishandled the moment, and the need for care for all who are harmed: Full video: youtu.be/FgaqKIxS4Hs

I guess Canada will just have to be content that our government is not run by pedophiles. :(

I think you be an olympic hockey referee you should be able to count to five.

Both teams are playing exceptionally well and no matter what happens I think we can all agree that everyone on Team USA should be imprisoned for life.

Double doink

Gizmo says hi from the emergency vet where he is very proud of his thousand dollar UTI. (He’s doing great)

Saw a cool stoat this morning.

People who write "crushed chilli flakes" in recipes, I am begging you to be more specific.

We have a game we play with Gizmo every morning where we get him to bring us things and then put them away and I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a dog make a face that said “where the fuck did I put that thing” but it’s very cute.

The Canada Sweden curling thing sums up today’s internet perfectly. Outraged, politicized and confidently wrong takes from people who had no idea what curling was two days ago.

We need to be pen testing our parents.

Old world dying? New world struggling to be born? TACO BELL: Now is the time of monsters!

Alternate headline: Discord going out of business in a month

Whoever voices Kermit in the new muppet show is bad at it

Pleased to announce I have purchased my own car from myself for $801B making me the richest person on earth

Guy just now realizing the most powerful nation on earth is run by pedophiles being blackmailed by Russia. "Oh wow."

Okay guy in shorts it’s -18 you need to calm down.