A thing that I think is good is when a human creates a piece of art

There's something therapeutic about watching a massive castle dissolve into dust

This shit is GAS white boy

So down bad, I don't even want to dispel the curses she's cast on me

Every time I squeeze this thing my ribs hurt

Drinking the extra strength potion, she will hear from me tonight

This is the best Halloween I've had in 5 years, and all I did was take a super long road trip, drink energy drinks and got my hair braided

I'm getting ads for witches to blow my dick smooth off

Currently seeking political asylum at ihop

Texting and flying a dragon

I love hearing about my homies premonitions

I ate a triangle the other day

An adventuring party tried to talk down the prices on my wares. I hit them all with power word torment and put them through a thousand lifetimes of agony

Been staring at the sky for the past 3 days. I don't think she fucks with me like that anymore

Just paid a bard to write a song about me striking someone with lightning

I think I'm going to frolic tonight

I once again find myself in at least 2 morally complex scenarios, one which may have legal ramifications

Chilling in the whip with an orc and some sort of creature, the vibes are immaculate

Charlatan, why are you hating from outside the club? You can't even gain entry

Sorry for not being around, moving into a new spire is emotionally draining

My homonculus gets so excited for his slop rations

Back from the club, demanding yogurt

Fucking wasted in the club communicating in bird calls

Woke up to a party of adventurers trying to pick the lock on my door. It was never locked

I am preparing to move into a new spire. It is quite exhausting

I think one of my favorite parts of being an adult is just being able to take a bite out of a loaf of French bread

I can tell the beast doesn't want me to go back to my spire, I wish I could make her understand that I need to

Might fuck around and feel worthless

The ancient one is sleeping in today, im making breakfast for the beast and an omelet for me

The ancient one likes to antagonize reckless drivers, it is really funny

Hanging out with the ancient one today, dude wanted to get subway

Yeah, im dabbling in necromancy, nothing too crazy though

A wizard does not respond to threats

I woke up late today and I had to rush out of my tower

I've never had a pizzeria fuck up this bad, dumbass sent me just olives

I keep a wand in the glove box, right next to some room temperature potions

Sometimes I forget that it's ok to take up space

Who up dueling in the parking lot?

Who up pondering

I'm going to start a beef with a theocracy

I'm not meant for a seditary life, hiding away in my spire. I must get up to some bullshit

See, I do this. My personal favorite is making the cursed individual think that all clouds are dragons for a 30 seconds once a month randomly

This week, I will be delving into maddness. Hopefully, it'll be fun

The ever watchful hound

Gonna hit the stanky leg in a fae circle this weekend

I love bringing golems to life and watching them run off to cause chaos

Magic is incredible

I'm trying to keep a cursed tree from growing back, it's incredibly time consuming

A giant vat of eyeballs that look at you as you walk by

I think I've been on too many adventures. My social battery is completely empty