🎶 Tell your boyfriend if he says he's got beef That I'm a vegetarian and I ain't fucking scared of him 🎵🎤

My hushand is watching #membersonly on Netflix and it’s complete MAGA trash. These women wish they were real housewives. This girl is being bullied and getting hives because she is being bullied by these women but she’s taking it because she wants to be close to Trump and Musk. 🤮

Why am I still a judgmental bitch?

My husband currently sporting a mustache and looking like the dad from Inside Out. 😍😍😈

Them: we want to come over and visit today. Me: great- come over whenever. By the way, we have just gotten over being sick. Just wanted to let you know. Them: thanks- we don’t want to be exposed to anything right now. Let’s reschedule. Let people make their own health decisions.

2026 is about being more skanky on the internet.

I’d rather watch a show about Mindy navigating life in Paris because she is so much more interesting and talented than #emilyinparis

I need people to stop replying to my emails today. I’m just here this week creating a paper trail to prove that I’m here and deserve to get paid. I’m not trying to be productive or make anything happen this week.

I just want to scream in the rooftops about #heatedrivalry and how cute it is.

New glasses came in today.

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Holiday party for the local LGBT chamber! 🌈 With @tuesdayswithcory.bsky.social

I’ve never met a horse girl over the age of 18 who was mentally stable.

I wonder if Tesla makes you take a survey to make sure you qualify as an asshole before letting you buy a Cyber Truck.

And quite frankly I don’t really want a lot of people at Thanksgiving anyways, but I’m just doing my due diligence of inviting people to be **inclusive**

I’m hosting my first formal thanksgiving and getting people to RSVP is so annoying. I just asked people to please let me know if they’re coming and everyone is responding with “who’s all coming?” Girl, why does that matter? You either want to come to my dinner or not.

"behind every gay person there is a gayer, more evil gay person"

Kind of like how happy I am that my husband is making dinner for once.

I never know what to say on these type of platforms. Should I just micro blog about every inconvenience I face?

Copilot is not a program that makes my life any easier. It reminds me a lot of an employee that I had to put on a PIP because they don’t pay attention and never do anything correctly.

Chat GPT > Copilot

I am a manchild and have continuously used my college email exclusively up until today when they blocked my access to it. I am so upset because my digital life is connected to this email account.

The YouTube algorithm keeps showing me Minecraft videos and it makes me think that I should start playing Minecraft. My only hesitation is that I do not have time for a new obsession right now.

My Buddhist practice is going great, except for the part where I silently judge everyone who annoys me.

I have been fuming over a salad for three hours now. I am sure this is a sign that I’m insane.

I hate when the Greek yogurt gets watery in its container.

Yo, what time is the rapture?

I need to figure out how to take all this confidence and swagger I have at work and apply it to my personal life.

Using Co-Pilot for the first time at work. I must say- it has nothing on my boo, Chat GPT.

Back in my 20’s I would be able to cut weight like crazy. Nowadays, I have been eating healthy, cutting out alcohol, and lifting/running and guess how much weight I have lost: none. I’ve gained 2 lbs. 😭 remind me again why I decided to give up my dinner wine?

As an aspiring Buddhist I try not to be judgmental. People make it SO hard to not to be judgmental.

Post workout selfie.

While I do not consider myself an alcoholic, I do like to have a few glasses of wine with friends at social events. I also like a nice beer after mowing the grass. I’m locking in for the rest of the year to abstain from alcohol to meet my fitness goals. 139 days to go.

So many false starts but excited to finally lock in and meet my 2025 health goals.

I don’t know how anyone can take themselves seriously on LinkedIn.

This trend where people post their Venmo QR codes and ask for money for their birthdays is tacky af.

Good Morning.

I was sort of feeling down on myself lately because I feel like I have been doing the bare minimum in this new season of life. But then I realized that my bare minimum is a lot. And I should be proud of that.

Happy surprise day off to me!

I feel like I would be so much happier here on earth if I was an idiot. All these ignorant people seem so blissful in 2025 and I’m jealous.

Im 35 years old. I’ve been a manager for half of my career. Today I was told that I can no longer send emails without having my manager approve them first. The micromanagement is jarring.

Who wants to be Blue Sky friends?

I thought that I struggled with anxiety and depression, but it turns out that I just hate working.

The internet is trying to force this narrative that Katy Perry is going to space and I honestly do not give a single shit about it. Stop.

Feeling the urge to be a lot less responsible with the content I post on BlueSky.

I don’t think I’ll ever have a full night sleep again.

I guess I’ll share a secret. I’m doing another round of #75Hard and it’s day 4 and I already feel miserable. I thought the honeymoon phase would get me through the first two weeks. But nope.

I’m the worst blue sky user ever. I feel like I never have anything to say or share.

Either people don’t know the concept of planning ahead, or I may simply be an uptight American.

I’m so tired of the bait and switch of Airbnb. I’m only doing hotels moving forward.