The best thing a lover can be is brave

1:30am cry about not having a dick while listening to Beyoncé to try and feel better #specificallythesongEgo

“You’re gonna need a rabies shot when I’m done with you”

Y’all mind if a weird freak girl remembers this is their one wild and precious life??

Escalators were not made in gods image, it is a stairway to heaven! NOT an escalator!

Today an old woman saw me walking with my lesbian boyfriend and gave us a full hand out the car window thumbs up, do we think she’s gay or just a passionate ally?

Bruce Springsteen and Snooki are the best Jersey has to offer

“You’re not just a pretty face, you’re also….a problem”

Not all angels are in heaven, for example I’m on my balcony

*blowing witch cig smoke all over your baby* don't worry it's natural

Gonna need a whole pot of tea and a witch cig on the balcony to calm down

I would give little Wayne a pass to say dyke but only 3 times in his life

Spent 2 hours building a nightstand so that the person I have a crush on could put their glasses down more conveniently

I have a crush which means I need to get put down

Doing my taxes next to Lu while they quit a job, we are getting shit done

So why is no one in your polycule fat?… Boring

One time I got my heart broke so bad that I started listening to healing frequencies

Femme like the moon not like a girl :)

Got called too pretty for the bottle depot today #trailerparkprincess

My mom wants me to get reiki and go on meds again

I know I was sexy and cool on my date because they guessed I’m a Scorpio

Just got such a good new journal….jizzing my pants rn

Y’all never seen a dyke and himbo be friends? Please

You’re in his DMs? I’m eating tofu off his biceps 🤷🏻‍♀️

Cancer full moon has me feeling big things and setting emotional boundaries

I have a bottle of non alc white wine and some organic body glitter made from seaweed, happy NYE!

My dream blunt rotation is all my ex bfs because I have some things to say

Ex bf from 6 years ago sent me an ig dm to let me know he had a piss based sex dream about me

If we fucked before I turned 25 then no we didn’t. “You ain’t fuck me, you fucked the old body” -Nicki Minaj

Continuing to be absolutely terrorized by local trans mascs

Sietara got me pregnant in value village

There are a couple zodiac signs that I do not wish to be loved by because I don’t like how y’all do it!

I’m sick and ovulating, I need to be put down.

Took an everything shower today, which for me means: -washing my hair -using a neti pot -conditioning my bush

I am at the library putting all the gay books on hold

When I say wtf I hope you know it’s what the freak

Notice how in cranes in the sky solange did not try -using two screens at once it away -over spending on Indian food it away -jerking off it away -cbd gummy it away And that’s why it didn’t work!

Lesbian sex is when you do it lizard style

Having to do my whole day in cowboy boots because my sneakers fell apart, feeling like a humiliation ritual

guy who gives every move on letterboxd a 5/5 because it's a miracle that we can capture stories on film and make the audience feel something

“I’m asking the original chat gpt, my autistic wife” - Sietara about me

What’s it called when you register someone having desire for you as a threat?

Sietara and I are in a straight marriage but we get gay with it as a treat

Explaining the NYC mayoral election using MLB terms to my roommate

TCMing my A&W order

Feeling heterosexual in this uber tonight

Gotta take a plan b after that strap

Breakup bolo tie