they’re all ready!!

I would MUCH RATHER have you read my writing than take $7 a month from you. If $7 is not an option, or even if you feel it’s not worth it, I STILL want you to be able to access my work. So, let me know, send me the email address that you want subscribed, and I’ll set that up, no questions asked.

🪜 open.substack.com/pub/pariscam...

Hot 26 + 2 - Sweat, Surrender, and the Slow Burn of Becoming open.substack.com/pub/pariscam...

New journal entry up on my substack 🙏❤️‍🔥 open.substack.com/pub/pariscam...

Not posting on any Meta entities today in support of the blackout. Throwing TikTok in there too, cause it’s honestly equivalent. If I can get it completed, might have an essay later for Substack subscribers, but in a nice flow — don’t buy things, if you’re not working, stay home & clean yr house 🖤

I don’t understand what’s happening or why it’s so cold

That new “contraception begins at erection” act proposed in Ohio is very Elle Woods coded

There comes a point in every tattoo heal where I’m like “ok that’s good enough, the rest could honestly fall out, I just want to stop itching”

new way to wake up in the morning!!

Can’t wait 🙏❤️

“You’ve been a bad, bad, very naughty girl!” *cracks whip* *makes you eat butter cookies*

Insane to me that I’m the only one in this house willing to eat the butter cookies we have (in bulk) in the cabinet

Today’s personal mission is to find a perfect working condition, electric, vintage typewriter for under $50… and I really think I can make it happen.

An evening read? open.substack.com/pub/pariscam...

What do u mean u guys are getting russian manicures every week? HOW? HOWWWW?

Officially a week vape free, but you never know

my bad

My wife was showing my 4yr old a video that's like 25 years old, she looked at a bag of chips in the video and asked my wife "you got any more?"

My day was stolen from me, the nap literally TOOK IT AWAY. I woke up, and cried about it. I AM STILL UPSET.

Do you guys think I should put this on my Subaru?

We should call these "flutters" bcuz the butterfly and not "tweets"/"posts"/etc

Wild to me that Apple had the audacity to default optimized charging for the MACBOOK? My computer just "decided" it was "for the best" to wait to charge it's battery 'til 8am, for "it's health" -- does it also want a fucking back rub and for me to wipe it??? Yes, I know I can turn it off, but pls

Driving Isn’t Ladylike open.substack.com/pub/pariscam...

nugget looked beautiful today everyone say hi nugget ur so pretty nugget

Birds. Birds? Yeah. Birds. open.substack.com/pub/pariscam...

Several years back, I made a video on how Grimes (allegedly) used reddit to detail her (allegedly) abusive relationship with Elon Musk - that video has been circulating again, ever since the inauguration, so I’m also posting the link here — www.tiktok.com/t/ZP8Fng9ak/

my nugget has been microwaved, everyone say welcome home nugget 🥹

"Sure, the powers that be and have always been created a cultural sensation to maintain an already existing culture of fear and oppression. And sure, in some ways it has bitten them in the ass. But has it really? Because does it matter who keeps the culture alive?" substack.com/home/post/p-...

Is it the Fig Newtons? Is that what's ruining my stomach? Tell me, I can take it.

There's 500 of you here from TikTok (I'm assuming) - can we do some intros so I can follow people back? What are you into, what do you post about, do you create a thing, are you on Substack? I like long walks on the beach, and I hate cops.

If there's gonna be a Wikipedia page about me, can we at least add a photo that isn't of my grandmother's dang house?

I’d be furious.

bruh help me

It’s -6° in Chicago with a “feels like” of -18°. We are down to our last roll of toilet paper, and I had to microwave my coffee twice.

I don’t know if I’ll survive the next 48 hours

I like it when my wife does the floor stretchy frog thing

The banning/unbanning/now state social media-ness of TikTok was straight up gaslighting on a national level. It was obvious, it was malicious, and you should not only be suspicious, but straight up pissed at any creator on there who is unironically embracing the app's return.

Form meets function

Ketamine is a hell of a drug.

how’s the gig goin’ now, carrie? #inauguration

is this the only place on the internet now that is not at least low-key if not officially US gov regulated?