You either die as Dwight Schrute, or live long enough to become that guy who never got over the fact that he’s really only ever been good at being various shades of Dwight Schrute but for some reason is mad at everyone else about it.

Recently found out my wife had no idea the live action Popeye movie existed. This was wild to me because it was played on broadcast tv constantly when i was a kid. But then I remembered that in spite of that I’ve actually never seen it because, even as a child, I couldn’t understand why one would.

I tell ya what; it is a strange and alienating time to not be much of a sports fan.

"So what's your take?" "I ain't afraid of no rolley coasters!"

When people are like “name your dream project” and it’s just like 5 dudes from different rock bands… Lame. Overdone. Uninspired. I want someone to introduce Ariana Grande to Diamanda Galas. Someone hook Cher up with El-P. Get Britney on the next Bungle record. Where’s the BTS / John Zorn collab?

Interior. Coffee Shop. The Plumber: yeah idk man i’ve been doing this for 20 years but this job is like nothing i’ve ever encountered before. i’m stumped. Friend: *quizzically* Have you tried plunging it? Plumber: *look of determined recognition directly at camera*

When did every other procedural show turn into a bunch of conversations with tertiary characters reminding the protagonist the very basic rules of their own job?

this goofy ass trend of people being like “you don’t dislike [mediocre thing] someone just told you that you should” is kind of grating. If it makes you feel better to believe your taste is universal for some reason have at it, but you’re not going to gaslight the whole world into being basic.

A fascinating phenomenon unique to this incredibly dumb era is credentialed YouTube reactors (vocal coach, bass teacher etc) having to pretend that, say, Rob Zombie is virtually indistinguishable from Pavarotti actually, so’s not to displease the dumbest whale in their Patreon subscriptions.

Pixar’s Dancer in the Dark

Hallmark Presents Requiem for a Dream

Evil Ep5: two likable medical experts co-sign “excited delirium” a condition invented to justify police state violence against marginalized people And in the B plot we go out of our way to show the team’s dedication to skepticism, leading further credence to the copaganda bullshit. digging it less

Getting into Evil (the show, not the hobby) and I’m kinda digging it but had a big ol LOL in the middle of ep1. The whole “Wernicke’s Area is dormant during sleep therefore you can’t read in dreams” thing was invented by Paul Dini for Batman TAS. Just a deus ex onboarded by an entire generation.

since we all know the Rebel Yell as the sound women make when Billy Idol has sex with them, it’s odd as shit that confederates used to do it on their way into battle. the only conclusion we can reach is that confederate soldiers had foreseen the arrival of Billy Idol and were super psyched about it

Genuinely wondering what my responsibility/capability is too. Like should I hound his YT comments like a psycho? Do I make response videos? Do I have some duty to not go back to forgetting about his narcissistic abusive ass? We’re not even in the same country ffs. idk. fuck him at any rate.

recently found out my estranged brother is a Temu quality new age grifter now and knowing what i know about him (destroyed my childhood with violence, multiple credible SA & DV accusations, pretty directly drove our mom to suicide etc) it’s given me a wider perspective on the rest of his ilk.

Good morning especially to all who have found a tasteful way to combine their Beltane and May Day revelries into a single constructive act.

Am I out of my mind or is the opening sample from The Cure’s Burn (bird sounds etc) taken from the movie Rawhead Rex? I’m finding nothing on this but I’m goddamn near convinced.

Tbh between the Butthole Surfers, GWAR, King Missile, Busdriver, Atmosphere, MIRV, Parliament/Funkadelic, Saul Williams and Foreign Beggars, my brain is rotten with “insane” lyrics. “I am the Unibomber. Making bombs out of toothpicks and glue, I put’em in a box and I send’em to you.”

Surely, on occasion at least, one must allow for the possibility of *some* diggity.

In the future people will have AI throw molotov cocktails at Sam Altman’s house for them.

They spent a decade complaining about safe spaces and then made a robot to give you compliments and tell you your mp3 of farting noises is Brian Eno

in a stunning victory, Donald Trump has forced the Iranian government to profit tens of billions of dollars a year against their will

It should be 100% legal for every person in the US to try.

Like I don’t even really make visual art. Sam Kieth is in my music. He’s in my fucking TTRPG campaigns. The Maxx is in everything cool I’ve done since I was 12.

Hearing the news of Sam Kieth and thinking of the line in that old Monster Magnet song “I was thinking how the world should’ve cried on the day Jack Kirby died…” like there’s just some people that shouldn’t be as much of an industry secret as they are, whose influence far surpasses their “success”.

We have lost an amazing legend. R.I.P. Sam Kieth. www.cbr.com/sam-kieth-th...

The domestic policy is an excellent example of a bitter impotent old fascist’s screaming death gasps but the foreign policy reminds us that unfortunately America’s most famous Monday morning quarterback just woke up one morning on the 50 yard line with a ball in his hand.

Not to be too much of a bummer but Kristi Noem for sure killed a whole horse this weekend, right? Like it would be wild if she didn’t.

The first person to try rebranding gay porn to MAN PORN will make billions off of these freaks.

And to clarify for once I am not that dipshit. I think it’s very strange and stupid to use an outlet to branch a wire, let alone one at face height obscured by closet hardware. But bizarre rogue electrical work is just one of the problems you tolerate if you want to own a home as a poor.🤷🏼‍♂️

I’ve spent literal weeks running to the breakers in my basement and junction box in my attic trying to figure out what happened to the electric in my bathroom only to find out I had forgotten about an outlet some maniac dipshit installed BEHIND the medicine cabinet because he was out of wire nuts.

No electricity, wi-fi, water, or sewer. Just dozens of formerly rich assholes cut off from everything they’ve ever known plus every few weeks a 30-something lady shows up in small boat with a sniper rifle and an insatiable desire to explode kneecaps. Until there’s no one left.

They should all be loaded onto the Lolita Express and taken back to the now deserted island where all the infrastructure has been capped and it’s surrounded by a blockade so nothing else gets in or out. Former victims can apply for hunting licenses if they like, otherwise it’s just good riddance.

Linux is autistic, Windows is neurotypical, and Mac is dark triad shit. You know it in your heart to be true.

Theres something about WINE creating this whole fake Windows world for the stupid little baby programs that can’t handle Linux that makes me respect it more. It feels like an extension of the autistic urge to flaunt mainstream “ethics” as an expression of your own real and better ethics.

The best thing about buying an 80 year old house is that it sits right in that space of too old to be considered new and not old enough to be considered cost prohibitively charming. What I could really do without is 3 different eras of impressively bad wiring ideas not being a landlord’s problem.

So this snow can really go fuck itself, huh?

okay but has it occurred to anyone that we might not actually need Vince Vaughn to show up in goddamn everything?

liberal walking into the car dealership: i want the second shittiest car you have. i will buy it for literally any price

I need folks to understand this. The idea that local police forces will intervene at scale against ICE is a utopian fantasy totally disconnected from how policing has always worked

"Fight against being ass" is a message that more people need to receive, tbh

D&D GM: ...as the villagers perish, the lich hits you all for 75 damage. What do you do? Mage: Fireball. Max level Barbarian: Channel my rage into my axe! HERE I GO! Archer: Overcharged arrows. Called shots. Eyes. Cleric: Turn undead. Let's send him to HELL. Chuck Schumer: I cast "Stern Letter"

Just got gassed pretty good at the labor union anti-ICE protest in Portland. Massive march, 5-10k strong. Vibes were very much liberal rather than radical. Lots of kids and older folks. They gassed the whole crowd as soon as it marched on ICE, in broad daylight.

Ah yes, letting the secret police just do night raids surely fixes the problem

statistically speaking several hundred thousand people turned 11 on 11/11/11 and, due to our knowledge of the world over the ensuing years, we can say with a fair amount of mathematical certainty that was probably the best day of most of their lives.

Rewatching The Strain (for no reason) and, aside from my nuclear hatred of Zack, I am once again struck by del Toro and Hogan’s extremely prescient grasp of the neoliberal mindset and its inherent reliance on eugenic ideals to perpetuate itself on its journey to fascism.

just thinking about this again. no reason.

If you’re a member of the press and your subject is a podcaster or some other bullshit artist pseudo-expert, ask yourself if “dilettante” would be a better descriptor. It’s a minor distinction perhaps but one that I suspect would have swift and severe impact across much of the griftosphere.