At this point, our best hope is to go full National Treasure and have Nicolas Cage steal the Epstein Files.

What's an evangelical's favorite basketball team? The Toronto Raptures. I'll show myself out......

Corporate lawyers preparing to sue the bejeezus out of the government over their Tylenol autism claims.

That “funeral” spectacle yesterday was the logical extension of decades of ostentatious mega churches and obscenely wealthy pastors preaching the most bastardized version of Jesus ever to most credulous congregations ever.

I guess every single member of the All Lives Matter and pro life crowds must be running late on their way to protest what ICE is perpetrating on a daily basis. It sure would be pretty hypocritical if they didn’t 🙄

This should be called what it actually is: a global coup by the world's most obscenely rich.

Conservatives view the constitution the same way they do the Bible. They pick and choose the parts they like and ignore the parts that don’t back up their agenda.

They hate transpeople but they're fine with Melania identifying as a coat and hat rack.

As this regime overreaches its power more and more, thinking of this gives me some hope......

I never expected America to be destroyed such absolute f*cking losers.

smart play would’ve been let Nexstar affiliates drop JKL alienate their customers then play hero offer free streaming ABC access to affected viewers as a 1st Amendment gesture while they negotiated & let things cool off. Instead Disney looks like enemy of free speech & nobody’s talking abt Nexstar.

The energy of the shooter's supposed texts is very much this......

Imagine explaining to the founding fathers that freedom of speech was ended by a reality TV show host based on people telling the truth about a bigoted walking set of gums.

Imagine your higher education being an Associate Degree in construction technology and speaking THIS condescendingly to someone who has a Ph.D in Microbiology?

I have to say, “Smart people don’t like me” is a pretty sick burn to your supporters.

“Smart people don’t like me” might be the first truthful thing Trump has said since being sworn in.

As everything we have built going back to FDR gets disassembled brick by brick, the @democrats.org are far too willing to be the Washington Generals to this regime’s Harlem Globetrotters.

If we had a functioning media, they would point out that what this regime constantly refers to as the "radical left" would be considered centrists or center left in the rest of the world's democracies.

It’s not lost on me that when I see video of people standing up to ICE, it’s almost always women that shame them into fleeing.

I can’t help but notice how there is no real mourning of Charlie Kirk on the right, just a seemingly endless stream of opportunism, hate towards their perceived enemies and angry rhetoric. There is no real love, care or friendship, just an alliance of political ideologues, craving power and money.

The anger over Charlie Kirk being quoted verbatim is just further proof that the right conflate freedom of speech with freedom from consequences of said speech

To be fair, you can't expect Trump to fly the flag at half mast for the victims of the Colorado school shooting because then you'd have to do it for all the school shootings. If you did that, then the flag would be at half mast 24/7/365.

Maybe it’s just a matter of semantics, but if the person who gets shot isn’t a politician, but rather an entertainer who conveys political views for their own personal financial gain, is it truly political violence?

So for all the Christians that are big on banning books because of the effects they can have on children, how come reading your religious books didn't have the effect of making you decent human beings?

The NFL can fuck ALL the way off with their "Por La Cultura" and other performative garbage when they're flooding the airwaves with ICE propaganda all day.

We've reached the point where the NRA is defending trans people's right to own guns in case you're wonder how utterly broken the timeline is.

For all you geniuses in Florida, you think all the home insurance companies pulling out of your state is bad? Wait until you see all the medical insurance companies fleeing your state rather than pay for all the kids with polio or whooping cough.

I am so grateful for @warren.senate.gov. Having to deal with an anti-science nutjob like RFK Jr and the rest of the unqualified charlatans in this regime has to be literal hell on Earth for her but nevertheless she persists.

No one won the Powerball again last night! What would you buy if you won? With a jackpot this high, I might try to buy a Supreme Court justice instead of just a Senator and a few Congressmen like I had originally planned.

Sure they’re late for this announcement but in this regime’s defense, reanimating a corpse takes time.

Imagine the media feeding frenzy that would have happened if President Biden seemingly vanished for days and the White House posted images of him that were quickly debunked as old photos and video?

Someone be sure to check the casket to make sure they’re not burying the Epstein files with him!

It would be peak Gen X if Trump dies and a millennial gets to be President before a single Gen X-er ever does.

I hope Travis and Taylor’s wedding registry includes releasing the Epstein files.

Doomscrolling......now with 25% more tangible doom!

So if Donald the Hutt’s executive order on flag burning is allowed to stand, that means future presidents can overrule existing Supreme Court rulings with their own executive orders. Good to know.

The first major newsroom that has the courage and financial backing to speak truth to power and not kowtow or sugarcoat all of the illegal and unconstitutional actions of this regime will be greatly rewarded both ratings and credibility-wise.

I know FIFA has already kissed the ring, but the clear fact is they cannot guarantee the safety of their fans and their competitors and should either cancel or move the 2026 World Cup. The IOC should already be making similar plans for the 2028 Olympics. This country is not safe for travel.

So where are the "good guys with guns" who we've been told are the only ones who can stop bad guys with guns, specifically the masked ones who won't identify themselves and are kidnapping people?

The people who are upset about the Cracker Barrel logo are the same ones who cried when the green M&M stopped wearing pumps.

I have to imagine that punching Stephen Miller would be even better than an amazing orgasm.

My current Follow suggestions on Instagram are nine drag queens and Jennifer Coolidge.

Call me old fashioned but I believe when negotiating a peace treaty, the country that was fucking invaded should be involved. #slavaukraini

Every day since January I've wondered, is this the emergency they were paging Dr. Beat for?

I know it’s popular but a Pink Pony Club sounds like a terrible sandwich. 🥪

Why does Billy Bob Thornton look like the Ghost of Pete Davidson future in that new T-Mobile ad?

People upset about Democratic states using gerrymandering need to remember Stellan Skarsgård's epic monologue in season 1 of Andor because we cannot fight with one hand tied behind our backs. "I’m condemned to use the tools of my enemy to defeat them. I burn my decency for someone else’s future."

So you're saying the government DOES have the authority to forgive student loan debt? I could have sworn the right were clutching their pearls about this very issue under the Biden administration?

We don't hate Chris Pratt because he's Christian. We hate Chris Pratt because we love "The House Bunny" and he screwed over Anna Faris.

For people and organizations bending the knee, kowtowing or obeying in advance to this illegal regime....... Japanese proverb: "If you get on the wrong train, get off at the next stop. The longer you stay on, the more expensive the return trip will be"