@queerarmorer.bsky.social : "You aren't the Yamcha of the house, you're the Krillin." Me: "So just as useless, but more capable of motivating others?" QA: "I take offense to that; he tanked Cell for like five minutes!"

This will only make sense to nerds like me, but have you ever had one of those days when you feel like the Yamcha of your household? 😭

Happy Friday!!

@queerarmorer.bsky.social described me as having "dancer's legs and a bruiser build." So, basically I'm a JoJo protagonist. 😁

Please help my found family and I get out of our nightmare and into a proper home.

My girlfriend just uninstalled Twitter and she's happier than I've seen her in weeks. I'm thinking I should ditch it too. I literally just use it to look up smut and there's so many better options for that.

Punky Monkey #1: "The Leopards Won't Eat MY Face!"

🎯‼️ #WeAreNotTheSame #CharlieKirk

The closest you will ever come to firing a real life Doom-style Super Shotgun.

When the Left in-fights, we hold 3-day long elections on how to codify our stance on violence in Gaza. When the Right in-fights, a white supremacist Christian nationalist puts a neck wound in a trans-misogynistic and racist propagandist. #WeAreNotTheSame

‘IGNORANUS’ I’m not really sure if this new word is an adjective or a noun. When I read its definition, a specific individual immediately came to mind. Made me laugh, despite its supposed ‘rude’ tone. Besides, we all know one and/or have one. :-)}

The irony that Charlie Kirk dropped out of college only to be dropped in a college is not lost on me.

No, I'm quite over the "don't dance on people's graves" phase of my life, thank you. I'm in my "let's empty your diva cup on Charlie Kirk's headstone" era now.

Charlie Kirk died as he lived... ... A pain in the neck.

I don't know what pisses me off more; that the custodian on overnights propositioned me last night or that he was only interested in me because I'm trans and he's "totally not gay, I promise." 🤢 We aren't going to talk about his foot fetish because that's hardly the worst thing in his record.

I saw Wonder Showzen for the first time last night. There was a solid 12 minutes where I was laughing so hard that no sound was coming out. 🤣

Apple cider > pumpkin spice Fucking fight me, bitch. 🥊

Let's be real, folks would eat this up in the 2020's if it got a She-Ra style rewrite. Maybe slip some subtle environmental messages in there.

What is it about men that wear a T-shirt and ball cap with a blazer and dress slacks that make me want to beat them in the face with an aluminum bat? #IrrationalHate or #ValidCrashout?

Question for tobacco smokers: why do you have names for cigarettes other than what they're actually called? I get people all night asking for "Marlboro Lights" when they really mean the Gold Pack. Explain this shaboingery immediately.

If you're wondering why I'm flooding y'all with unrelated posts, these are the thoughts I have when I finish my work early but have to stand at the register for another 3+ hours with nothing but the voices in my head to keep me company. #ThirdShiftLife

Being the token #Xenial of a group of nerds is wild. I share nostalgia with them all the time only to bring up something related that they were never around to have context for. Imagine having a back-and-forth about Transformers lore only to be hit with, "what the hell is Beast Wars?" #Hag

I live in a country where I had to transfer my ENTIRE savings account to my checking account because my insurance didn't cover a life saving surgery that keeps me from DROWNING IN MY OWN BILE. It is LITERALLY too expensive to be sick in America. #AmericaWasNeverGreat #FuckAmerica #Healthcare

It's not just me, right? My new lighter totally has #SapphicEnergy, does it not?

"Behind Blue Eyes" by The Who is one of those pieces of media that's a certified classic, but also a CRIMSON red flag if someone likes it too much. Like, my sibling in Slaanesh; you do realize that song is literally the villain throwing a tantrum about being a "misunderstood genius," right?

Apparently, I've unintentionally trained @queerarmorer.bsky.social to hear the unique sound of my shoes and rush out to hug me before I leave for work and I think that's adorable. 🥰

I love how Giuliani can go straight from screaming "Decency! Family Values!" at GOP fundraisers to picking up a hooker on the side of the road and crashing his car as a result. If the cops weren't corrupt pigs there'd be genuinely WILD tox screen results going around but this ain't that universe.

Fun fact: Erythrism is a condition where animals produce red or pink pigmentation normally not found in their species. And so, since all big cats are panthers, you could call this Golden Tiger a "Pink Panther."

A vape that doubles as a retro gaming console... HOW IS THIS NOT BEING CALLED OUT FOR MARKETING TO CHILDREN? 🤬 #vplay #tobaccofree

I remember this guy from a therapy group a decade ago. He had a book he carried with him full of phone numbers crossed out; all of his friends dead to that apathy. That book was his closest thing to seeing them again. You owe it to all who have died to keep going. Queer survival is revolutionary.

Horrifying thought I keep having today: In this generation, 35 years old is considered a queer elder because there was a plague that the government decided to let eugenically decimate the queer population and now 35 is considered old. I want to cry but I am focusing on letting it radicalize me.

This is one of my favorite chicken recipes - Lemon Pepper Wet. And this is the best it's ever been. The secret is garlic powder.

You were today years old when you realized that "hakuna matata" was the original "no fucks given."

"I'm gonna go light some incense, smoke a roach, and go to bed; if any of you need a cuddle buddy, you know where to find me." #QotD

Always 💖 Don't make me tap the sign

Seriously, what did we ever fucking do to you to spiteful, little shits?

Dear entitled customers, If you're too impatient to wait for me to count your change, I'm not stopping you to tell you that an extra five got stuck in there because you were in too much of a hurry and I'm keeping it as compensation for your rudeness Be respectful, be patient. Thank you.

@mimcubus.bsky.social It should actually be easy to play Mim in DnD. Just make a Tiefling Archfey Warlock whose patron sends them out to collect dreams and fantasies. Designed in Hero Forge. #Mimages

#QuoteOfTheDay: "Part of the fun of being in a queer poly relationship is thirst posting with friends."

TRUMP WANTS A 3RD TERM! The last time Americans voted for a Democratic Socialist as President, they elected him 4 times in a row. Franklin D Roosevelt (FDR) = Emergency Banking Act, FDIC, New Deal, Social Security, NRLA, minimum wage, 40 hour work week, Allied Coalition, the 2nd New Deal... F-TRUMP!

IMPEACH WALZ, HEGSETH, GABBARD Trump downplayed texting of sensitive plans for a military strike against Houthis this month to…a journalist, saying it was “the only glitch in two months” of his administration.(PBS) Trump: ”I don't think he (Waltz) should apologize. I think he's doing his best.”(Fox)

Carlin understood the cruelty and dishonesty of our country better than any of us.

“I WANT YOU TO STOP BEING AFRAID: of other Americans of other religions of other classes of other nations of speaking out. YOU'RE AMERICANS. ACT LIKE IT! If you don't get it, ask an American who does."

The fact that I'm the only person at my job that isn't a chain smoker or an alcoholic in spite of a family history of addictive personalities says a lot about my character and makes me feel powerful AF.

Told a customer that insults and verbally abused me weekly that I wasn't going to serve him. He told me that he hoped that I burned in my car and declared victory as he ran away like a coward. Is this the country y'all voted for? Misogynistic rednecks too scared to stand their ground?

If you're AMAB wearing suspenders and you AREN'T nonbinary or a butch transbian, I'm gonna assume you enjoy the smell of cow shit a bit too much. #MyToxicTrait

The fact that she's that good looking and been on HRT for only half as long as me feels disrespectful. 🤣💜

People in my area, particularly older people, clearly never heard the phrase, "fewer words, greater impact," and it shows.

Cartoons voiced by real animals (Episode 2): Fox