In the novel I'm reading now the protagonist's mother has two cats. Their names are Da Pang and Er Pang, which roughly translate to "Big Fatty" and "Second Fatty". I just thought people should know about this.

I'm the worst kinda sick: the kind where I feel miserable, but I have so much work I still have to do it because I'm not actually actively dying right now.

Mascots aren't supposed to feel like they're introduced to you half way through a gripping family drama TV series.

Extremely curious about Carolyn (buffalo nuggets). What kind of nugget crimes did she commit?

I know I'm painting castles in the sky here, but I desperately want to live in a world where Google is constantly sued for the garbage it's AI puts out.

Work ethic is doing your best to make an excellent proposal that you hope will get shot down, because actually implementing it would be more work for you and you alone.

Manalan Mailla by Finnish ethno-pop artist Vilma Jää is out wherever you find music. Inspired by the Ingrian ensemble runolaulu tradition, you first heard it in our Paranatural Manhattan trailer! Enjoy Zoe's Mixtape! #CONTROLResonant https://open.spotify.com/album/7Hu1bOBWCQw3LklaKFwX3q

This is accurate advertising! 🤣🐅 #HeMan #MastersOfTheUniverse #BattleCat #Kitten #CatManChris

Currently hovering between "I'm glad to have job still" and "OMG WHY IS THERE SO MUCH WORK?!!".

Really not looking forward to going to work next week. We had a temp here that was supposed to take care of the itinerary for a visiting media person and now the temp is gone and the itinerary still has gaping holes in it and I'm going to have to patch them all up.

The big supermarket was offering me a sale on some weird series of chips all rather dubiously named after a nationality of some sort. Got me a bag of "Aztec Fire" sweet potato chips and they were very good, but was infinitely more amused by the "Nordic" flavor, which was literally just salt lol.

Good news: my job is secure for at least three more months. Bad news: New supervisor asks me what I think of AI, then proceeds to go on about how much she loves it.

Why the fuck is Tony Blair still allowed to give his opinion on anything?

Early meeting today, got up at 6 am. Took a shower. Dried my hair. Got dressed. Checked my calendar. Meeting is tomorrow. ...Going back to bed.

I'm catching up on my feed again, so for all my mutuals sorry in advance about your notifications.

Driving behind the HORSE SOLUTIONS HORSES van. My intuition says they might be transporting horses.

I wish I could read and sleep at the same time.

If a treat has the name of a fruit or a berry in it it should be good for you and have no calories but alas, the world isn't just.

Today is the slowest day in the history of days.

Anyone wanna cover for me so I don't have to go to work tomorrow? I've slept so badly these last few days I feel like I need a week to recover.

I'm glad Finland didn't win Eurovision. It's a rightful egg in the face for everyone here going "Oh, but we HAVE to take part to stop Israel winning!". Such BS, this was all about Finnish desperation for recognition and the pathetic need for attention again. We should have boycotted with others.

First properly cold and moist day of early summer, something that I definitely didn't miss during winter.

Someone left us snippy feedback because they were unable to get to our website through a link that was on SOMEONE ELSE'S WEBSITE. "Very embarrassing for you" okay smartass, explain to me how I'm supposed to know a 5 year old page somewhere on the internet has our link wrong, let alone fix it.

SOMEHOW has eaten my tub of salted caramel ice cream from the freezer and nobody is confessing, they're just trying to gaslight me into thinking it wasn't there in the first place! THIS WILL NOT STAND. THAT WAS PREMIUM PRICE ICE CREAM! IN THIS ECONOMY!! Does anyone have Columbo's number?

It's the year of our Lord 2026 and with horror I come to the realization that my dad still doesn't get how bookmarks work in his browser.

Being properly middle aged and bonding with my mother over how terrible the goo they make you drink before a colonoscopy tastes.

For the coolest kid in class.

This isn't the only dad joke I did, but I liked this one enough to enshrine it. www.twitch.tv/fdejeuner/cl...

Whoever keeps fucking up the global distribution chain of my hormone meds is rising up on my Enemies list like a rocket.

It's May, so it's time to play everyone's favorite game: "Is it the flu or just my allergies?"

I just read in the news that there's some guy going to court accused of growing cannabis "with greater than normal expertise", so with that logic he'd have gotten off easier if he'd been a really shitty drug dealer. "We only allow skunk weed here, get out with your quality produce!"

YouTube joins the Michael propaganda unit by showing me the trailer and having their auto subs try to convince me that the lyrics to Billie Jean go "Jesus is my love".

My improvement suggestion for Polymarket is that they SHOULD allow betting on human lives, but only on the lives of people who use Polymarket. Get on it people, I wanna see the odds for Donald Jr being gunned down by mobsters vs him choking to death while eating a napkin he thought was a waffle!

In case you're wondering why I normally don't watch sad movies, I just brought myself to tears with the plot of an opera I imagined and that doesn't actually exist.

Not gonna call this an "extremely basic bitch" selection even though it is, but Max Muncy might want to talk to his girl about her choice of a song all about how buying stuff with her friends is preferable to being with a guy.

I have charted out a new Asian restaurant near my work place, which gives me lots of new lunch options yay. Adopting a new Asian restaurant always takes me some time, mostly due my allergies, but also cause I have to figure out if they're doing authentic spice levels or Finnish spice levels.

Love to have a horrible nightmare because it's too cold in my room and my body is starting to send out distress signals.

Me trying to conjugate "the services which you provide" in Finnish: "Tarjoamammiamme...tarjoaminiamimme...tarjoaminamme...FUCK THIS 'your stuff' there!"

I've made a new culinary discovery I need to share: bread cheese goes really well with spicy rice dishes! Try it if you're in the rare segment of people who enjoys AND has access to both bread cheese and spicy rice dishes.

Looks like Russ should not have informed his personal assistant that they're fired just before telling them to organize his notes for this TV appearance.

I'm gonna have a fight with my biological clock if it doesn't stop waking me up at 5 am ON SUNDAYS!!

Everyone keep your fingers crossed for me because my niece has the flu and I super can't get sick now because I'm supposed to be hosting an important training for the software we use at work on Monday. If I get sick we have to cancel the whole thing and that will be such a hassle.

So Chrome has this issue where if you have automatic translation on it will sometimes try to translate sites that are ALREADY in Finnish into Finnish and I want to push the person who caused that off a cliff because it has made trouble shooting customer issues with our database SO MUCH HARDER.

Cats in chaos! Anarchic new drawings by Léo Forest 🐱 www.thisiscolossal.com/2026/04/leo-...

I should be entitled to special arrangements at my place of work due to my chronic "forgot to attach the file I meant to send with my email".

Would not live in this house, but would 100% use it as a location for my 1995 FMV mystery video game.

In one year at my current job I've gone from "I don't know how anything works" to "I'm the only one who knows how this works" and I honestly don't know who's gonna take care of all this stuff if they decide not to renew my contract.

There's an international cat show in town this weekend and I'm torn, because as I principle I'm against selective breeding and the whole concept of "pure breeds" being put on display and judged against some arbitrary criteria, but on the other hand caaaaaats. SO MANY CATS.