Struggling for TV at the minute. Chewing through anything positive or fluffy we can find but WADING through so much high octane scary action conspiracy stuff to get there. Honestly, studios? Read the fucking room. If I want nothing but chaos I'll watch the news.

Well I may not be any more successful this year BUT I truly believe that what I write is getting dumber so at least I know I haven't peaked.

We need a new digital right - to be left the fuck alone. By adverts, work stuff, and just endlessly trying to tell us we're broken in some way and need fixing. All that stuff is there when we want to look at it but it would be nice to not be bombarded with shit from the moment we wake up.

What a fucking day.

Well this sounds brilliant.

I hate how quiet my house is now. I block it out most of the time, I listen to music, I make sure something is making noise, but then when my wife is asleep and it's just me, then I'm alone with silence, absence, and a house full of ghosts. I hate it here. I would burn it down if I could.

Recently several friends have come up with some weird, fucked-up idea and then decided to let mw know they thought of me as an ideal person to turn it into a story. Should I be proud of that?

I'm not saying the rattling window on this bus is loud but it sounds like two giant hornets fighting in a skip using high-powdered dildoes as light sabres.

Got to love the number of "talk to a professional if you're depressed" and "report domestic abuse" ads and emails I keep getting sent. Have you ever fucking TRIED to do any of those things? "Ah, you're high risk, so you need to self-refer to St Wagnall's and wait six months. Good luck! Don't die!

This is just to say I have taken Those plums Out of the icebox And climbed in Fuck yes

Star Trek DS9 lore. Gul Dukat had a secret identical twin. Dup Likat.

You can draw a through line between Standing Rock, Stop Cop City, the Palestine encampment student protests, and the results of the Prairieland case. And then still have Dems asking why there aren't more protests...

I think I've reached that point where I'm so badly in need of a holiday / extended sick leave that I don't think there's any powering through it. Shit.

Need to find a local writing community but it's HARD. Cornwall has an amazing arts community but I need to find one where my big weird butt fits in... I don't MIND being the odd one out but it would be nice not to be for once without travelling hundreds of miles to do so.

The next PM needs to hit the ground RUNNING. They have to do something big, quickly deployed, and undeniably of benefit to a LOT of people. Starmer's premiership has been like an unenthusiastic hand job, or ten minutes of labial nudging followed by a stern, vaguely accusatory, "why didn't you cum?"

Well I don't envy Andy Burnham the job he's going for but there are really only a few ways to fund what the country needs, and all will face massive opposition from certain well-funded corners. Reversing Brexit. Tax avoidance by huge firms. Going after the fucking billionaires.

It's the hope that gets you. I had a little hope for today. A tiny, stupid hope that I shouldn't have allowed myself that was never going to come to anything. And it didn't. Of course. But when things are out of your control and what you want isn't yours to claim, what else can you do, but hope?

Me internet mate's got a new book coming out, and between you and me I reckon it'll be a kraken read... (Great pun. And for free??? Fuck yeah, that's value.)

I hope you remember me today. I hope somewhere under the anger and confusion an ember of me remains, even just a glimmer in the dark that has never quite gone out. A spark. A hint of doubt about the things you've been told. A mote of light onto a future with me in it. I will always love you.

Hiding on Blue Sky for the weekend because it lets me block all references to Father's Day. I wish FB and others allowed you this level of control over what you see, allowing you to prioritise your wellbeing over whatever they're trying to sell today.

Do you ever wish you could just start it all over from scratch? Pick your life up and drop it somewhere else? Change almost everything about how things are and live a completely different existence?

You've got to admire people like Royal Huddleston Burpee. Invents an exercise that has immortalised his name, benefitted the human race by improving the health of countless people, and is hated by absolutely fucking millions of us. Good work sir and fuck you.

Watching Monarch: Legacy Of Monsters, and loving Joe Tippet as Tim right now. I don't know what it is about a nerdy desk-bound guy in his forties who proves to be brave and more than a bit badass once he's needed to be. Not like I'm at my desk, in my forties, and... um... *Whistles*

Definitely recommend following Gary Delaney if you're not already. High on my list of comics I'd love to see but know I'd be seeing without my beloved.

Fight sport idea to prove ultimate manliness. BOLLOCK CONKERS.

Have to love the optics given the whole "drain the swamp" thing. Turning a landmark into a flag-shagger statement but ACTUALLY turning it into a stagnant pool would be a heavy-handed metaphor in fiction... Also funny that Big Oil's Bitch has turned it into a carbon sink by accident.

Monarch season 2... One gripe about rescuing Shaw from Axis Mundi. "We can't! Kong's going bananas!" Totes valid. But none of the experts said "we're on the side where time goes MUCH faster, give it a week for things to calm down. He won't have even hit the ground yet. He's safer than we are."

I think it's cute when people post "Brexit divided the nation" like Brexit sprung up from brand new evildoers rather than being born out of almost four decades of neoliberalism making sure the rich got perpetually richer and the poor stayed where they were and knew it was their fault.

Mayonnaise. I appreciate that there is "real" mayonnaise out there that has flavour etc but the vast, VAST majority of it is just this greasy, flavourless bread lube that's only there because people who make prepacked sandwiches can get it by the tanker much cheaper than butter or margarine.

Listening to High Potential while I'm working at it keeps throwing me that Kaitlin Olson sounds a lot like Julie Benz. Keep thinking she's guest starring. So far nope. Also, give Julie Benz more work. She be epic. Innit.

Just blocked "Father's Day" as a term on Bluesky. Will honour my lovely dad and then go into hiding. Fuck this year.

If you're the black sheep of the family, the weirdo, the one born with enough chaos for triplets, enjoy it. Don't become the reliable one any sooner than you must. If at all. Better that's someone with all the tools, & not a gremlin like us trying to MacGyver everything with two sticks and a spoon.

Watching "Over Your Dead Body" and I swear to God Samara Weaving is amazing in these comic but really fucking violent movies. For some reason the way she went "aaah fuckin' hell!" when Tod was about to run her into a beam absolutely cracked me up.

Watching the final season of Banshee and much as I want justice for Rebecca and the victims of the serial killers, I mostly want to go after the people who hurt Job.

The USA is doing sportswashing all wrong. The idea is you do a Russia or a Qatar and welcome everyone in, trying to appear super-cute so that people stop thinking about your appalling human rights violations and corruption. You're not meant to shine a light on it. Stupid country.

If Henry Cavill would like to make an absolute ride-or-die ally out of me he could do worse than encouraging GW to build an open world Inquisitor game. Of the Skyrim / Dragon Age / Mass Effect kind where you start out as a neophyte and can become as good or bad as you like. Twould rule.

I'm normally quite a cheerful drunk but this one time I tried a new drink and I couldn't stop arguing with people, even when I agreed with them. That's the last time I drink the Devil's advocaat.

I'm an employer. If your CV is written by an AI, it's going in the bin. The CV and how it is written IS A PART OF THE FUCKING INTERVIEW.

Considering spending father's day asleep this year. Drop in on my fantastic dad to drop off card and present, spend a little time, then go home and hide until work on Monday. FML.

Bernadette, Adam, and Tick.

This one stings. Loved him as Giles, his work on Rocky Horror, Nathan Wallace in Repo!, and loved to hate him as Rupert Mannion. Sometimes a lovely human is the perfect choice to play a perfect arsehole. Will share my favourite Anthony Head story below. Rest in peace. You were brilliant.

2 years and I'm still as funny now as I was then. This is not a brag.

Really disappointed in Andy Burnham for Labour leadership potential. We need someone who's a BIT radical. At least a bit. Not just a new manager who's far from perfect but the staff all just feel at least he's less of a useless cnut than the last one. Not exactly inspiring is it?

And this morning the Shed is a distant sailing ship, on the far horizon…

As AI has advanced both predictive text and auto-correct have gotten VASTLY worse.

I know where we go. Cable Street.

If Tucker Carlson was a stopped clock it'd read 23:61 at midnight.

Dieting is really hard right now. Not just because it's hard anyway, or because of stress eating, but because I spend a lot of time on the internet and it makes me want to bite things.

Finally trying Horizon: Zero Dawn. Rost: "They're not allowed to talk to us. We're outcasts." Aloy: "OK but do we HAVE to live in the valley of the cunts?"

Harambe implies the existence of Halalbe.